


Sink Your Teeth Into Forever

by Ren_rum



Category: Black Veil Brides, Falling in Reverse
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Black Veil Brides Army, Human/Vampire Relationship, M/M, Male Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:48:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 48,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25731628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ren_rum/pseuds/Ren_rum
Summary: It's the tail end of 2010, Ronnie Radke is a free man at last. It's time to start a new life in Hollywood; with a new band and a new home, his life is finally back on track. There's just one minor difference, he's been dead for almost a year. A prison fight went wrong and life as he knew it would never be the same.Andy Six is ready to take over the world, with a year of touring under his belt, no one could stop him. Reckless and enjoying his newfound stardom, the thought of his own mortality was not something he entertained. Too fast for love and too wild to be tied down, danger excited him.A chance encounter with the ex-convict on Andy's 20th birthday would set them both on a course neither could stop.
Relationships: Andy Biersack/Ronnie Radke
Comments: 55
Kudos: 35





	1. Prologue

**Sink Your Teeth into Forever**

**Prologue**

_December 2010_

_Men were everywhere, all over each other, the guards watching helplessly as they ordered the prisoners to disperse or they would fire their weapons. It had all happened so quickly, two men arguing over an exchange gone wrong. Before the guards could intervene, a shank came out, the first man plunging it deep into the other man’s chest. Blood spilled out onto the stone floor, the site acting as a dog whistle to the rest of the men gathered. Yelling, cursing, more blood._

_Guards drew the weapons, a few banishing batons started to beat the men in orange jumpsuits. Ronnie hit the ground with a thud, the wind being temporarily knocked out of him as a man twice his size wrapped his hands around his throat. The singer fought to push the guy off him; he knew the man on top of him, he was notorious and not for good reason. Fang was what he called himself, in jail for three first degree murders._

_The twenty-seven-year-old was no match for the man’s almost inhuman strength. Fang’s eyes were wild, a burst of manic laughter escaping his lips as he strangled the man underneath him, slamming his head against the hard floor. Ronnie managed to grab the makeshift knife from his jumpsuit, jamming it into the side of Fang’s ribs._

_“You think that’s going to stop me, pretty boy?” He laughed, blood pouring out from the wound._

_The singer stabbed at Fang’s arm, desperate to get any amount of air into his lungs. Blood spurted from the wound, covering Ronnie’s face as the psychotic man laughed. He could taste the man’s blood in his mouth as his vision started to fade. The feeling of teeth sinking into his neck was the last thing he felt before darkness overtook him, his body too paralyzed from shock to scream. The rumors were true._

_\---_

Ronnie bolted up in bed, if he still had a heartbeat it would be racing, instead, there was an eerie stillness inside his ribcage. The sunlight seeping in through the narrow window of his cell burned his eyes as he tried to calm his breathing. He’d had the same dream every night for the past twelve months, sometimes waking up and feeling relief that it was all just a bad dream. It wasn’t until the gnawing hunger that never seemed to be satisfied reminded him the nightmare would never end.

The dark-haired man didn’t remember much else from that day, only the feeling of Fang’s teeth puncturing his flesh and how his grasp on consciousness had started to fade soon after. The next thing he knew, he was waking up in the infirmary; his entire body had felt like it was on fire, burning up from the inside. He swore his head was going to explode, everything seemed more intense. The lights were brighter, he could hear the heartbeats of every inmate laid up around him, and the smell of blood ignited an animalistic urge inside him.

At first, he thought it was some virus, the shakes, the nausea every time he tried to eat, the migraines when the sun shone down on the courtyard. The other possibility was too wild to imagine; that the rumors about Fang were true. No one knew his real name; he’d gotten the name Fang because of his victims. Three women found in the Las Vegas desert, completely drained of blood, two puncture marks on each of their necks.

Though the singer tried to deny the clear signs, including the mysterious lack of a pulse, he couldn’t deny the hunger for too long. It was the next prison fight that he tasted blood for the first time, only managing to stop himself moments before the man would have died. That had been his reality for the past few months.

Fang had been moved to a solitary confinement cell following the fight in the lunchroom, leaving Ronnie unable to even try to figure out what was happening to him. He’d pieced together parts of it, his friend Enrico had told him how the guards freaked out when they couldn’t find his pulse. ‘ _Man, they thought you were dead, then you come walking back in here without a scratch on you the next day’_

As it turned out he wasn’t Fang’s only victim, there were others, and they eventually found him. They filled him in on his new reality. He _had_ died, Fang had drained him completely. It seemed to be something about the blood, if you died with it in your body you came back. If you didn’t, you stayed dead. You could feed without turning someone or killing them, but it took practice. Slashing Fang’s arm, that’s what made the difference in his fate. He wasn’t sure if that was good or bad.

Still relatively new, the prospect of being undead made him uneasy. He still felt like himself, and with the exception of a slightly paler complexion, looked like himself too. Having to avoid the sunlight, feed and get used to his newly heightened senses to some adjusting, but things weren’t all bad. He was stronger, faster and essentially invincible to injury; qualities that made prison life much easier.

All that wouldn’t matter soon, after two and a half years of staring at the same concrete walls, he would be getting a much-needed change of scenery. Let’s see the music scene try to fuck with him now, he was coming for blood… literally. 

“Stand clear of the door!” a police officer yelled from the other side, the locks clicking as the metal door swung open.

Ronnie’s lips twisted up in a smile, his pearly white fangs barely hidden behind them. Today was the day; he was a free man.


	2. I'm Not A Vampire, But He Is

**Chapter One: I’m Not A Vampire, But He Is**

_December 26, 2010; Hollywood, CA_

The shot of whiskey burned the singer’s throat as he threw it back, the golden liquid gone in a second. One more year and he’d actually be legal, no more relying on fake IDs and other people. Of course, then it wouldn’t be fun anymore; fun only existed at the boundaries of the law. Until then he’d take pride in his rebellion.

Twenty-fucking-years. Two decades of determination and clawing his way to the top and he was finally tasting success. 2010 had whizzed by the young man, his life-changing rapidly when the band’s freshmen album hit the Top 40 charts. Four tours down, and another album on the way, no one could call him a nobody anymore. Well, they could if they wanted the shit beat out of them that was.

“Happy birthday, Six” Richard smiled, patting his friend on the shoulder. 

Andy returned the smile, taking a drink from his soda to wash the taste of whiskey from his mouth. The man had thrown him an elaborate party, complete with a KISS shaped cake and copious amounts of alcohol. It was a nice gesture; the raven-haired man had never had friends growing up, leaving birthdays a bit of a sore subject. Being born the day after Christmas didn’t make things any easier, what kid wanted their birthday overshadowed by the biggest holiday of the year?

The bitterness of the past aside, he appreciated finally having the experience of a real celebration. His friends, band, and fans had come together to make him feel like a king. It was only more proof that his former life in Ohio was behind him, he was on to bigger and better things. Full of passion, youth, and a little too much whiskey he was ready for it all.

The man sat back in the booth, taking in the sights in front of him. Most of the fans had left a little after midnight, only a few older ones sticking around for the real celebrations. People were drinking, chatting, and dancing around on the makeshift dance floor.

He deserved this. While fame had come fast, it wasn’t without effort. Living in his car for a month before finding Jake and moving in with him had been hell. Most days it was a fight between spending money on food and gas or another pack of cigarettes; it was no surprise which one he tended to pick. The singer had too much pride to beg for money or handouts, preferring instead to cut his teeth on the streets of Hollywood.

Touring the country in a van had been an experience, one he gladly never had to endure again. Playing shows in basements to a handful of people before driving hours to the next venue just to sleep in their van for a few hours, all of that had paid off. Sure, he still slept on a mattress in his bandmate’s spare room, but what was the point of spending money on an apartment when you lived life on the road?

Andy’s crystal blue eyes scanned the room, though technically not his birthday anymore, there was still celebrating to do. He relished in the perks his newfound stardom brought, one of which was all the excitement and indulgence life could offer. Already drunk and high off a few lines that only left one piece of the unholy rock trinity of sin left. He just needed to find a partner in crime.

Ronnie pushed the door to the bar open, raising an eyebrow at the plethora of black balloons, streamers, and homemade signs on the walls. It looked like Hot Topic and Party City had thrown up everywhere; beyond tacky if you asked him. As long as they were still serving liquor, he could care less.

The ex-convict made his way to the bar, flashing a brilliant white smile at the woman working behind it. Ever since that fateful day, it seemed like people went out of their way to please him like he had some type of supernatural charm. It was far from the worst of the changes. His eyes fell down to her neck which was adorned by a dainty silver necklace. _Fuck; not her._

“Thanks, love.” He spoke in a cool voice, taking the drink from her, disappointed that she wouldn’t be his next meal.

He thought he had most things figured out by the time they let him loose on the world, but over the past two weeks, he’d learned a lot. Apparently, the whole silver thing wasn’t some stupid cliché in all the books and movies; guess every creature had to have a kryptonite. Turns out bitches in expensive tennis bracelets and lockets were his. 

So, he couldn’t touch silver, and thanks to his lack of supervision outside of prison walls he couldn’t stay in Las Vegas. The first three days out had been a blood bath, by his count he’d murdered five people in the span of seventy-two hours. He had intended to leave them alive, dazed, and confused by the strange marks on their necks, but plans change.

Hollywood was a better fit for him and his new band anyways. Of course, it was far from a fresh start, he was pretty infamous in the music scene. His reputation wasn’t something he could shake, oh well.

“What happened here? A fucking birthday party or something?” The vampire asked, his eyes going back to the woman’s beautifully exposed neck.

“Oh, yeah… the kid over there in the back booth.” She replied, nodding to a darkened corner of the bar.

Ronnie looked over in the direction. A veil of long back hair obscured the boy’s face as he peered down at this phone, long pale fingers dancing across the screen. Dressed in a leather jacket and the tightest black leather leggings he looked like he had walked straight off the streets of Skid Row in the ’80s. His long thin legs were crossed underneath the table, a lit cigarette in between his plump red lips. He had Ronnie’s attention.

What was something so beautiful doing sitting alone? And on his birthday of all days.

The older man made his way towards the back of the bar, drink in hand. He had to get a better look, always important to size up your prey first.

Icy blue eyes shot up to meet his and something in them seemed familiar. Ronnie had met so many people in his life, although many of them were a blur thanks to the effects of drugs and alcohol. He’d met the boy before, somewhere, he wouldn’t forget a face so beautiful.

Andy smirked at the man standing in front of him, parting his lips as he exhaled from his cigarette. Although he tried his best to come off calm and unconcerned, inside his chest his heart was pounding. He’d recognized the man the second he came in, who wouldn’t recognize a guy like Ronnie Radke? The guy was a legend.

“Can I help you?” the younger man asked, tilting his head to the side.

Ronnie could hear the boy’s heart racing; he could see straight through the act. Based on the way he was dressed, the kid had to know who he was, probably had posters of him at home. The hunger was intensifying, focused intently on the leather-clad man in front of him.

“I heard it was your birthday, but yet, you’re sitting by yourself?” Ronnie smiled softly, noticing a sign with the name ‘Andy’ on it.

Andy. That name sounded familiar as well, but he still couldn’t recall why.

“Yeah… and you’re late to my party, Ronnie…” The way the older man’s name sounded in the boy’s sultry deep voice sent a shiver down his spine.

“So, you’re a fan?” Ronnie raised an eyebrow, taking a seat at the booth.

“I guess so… but the real question is, do you not remember me?” Andy asked, pouting playfully.

The older man studied the raved haired man, wracking his brain for where they had met before. A patch on his studded leather jacket was the trigger he needed; _Black Veil Brides_. He’d heard that band name before, years ago from a starry-eyed sixteen-year-old kid in Ohio.

“Ohio.” Ronnie chuckled, the memory of the show four years prior starting to come together.

It was with his old band, on one of their headlining tours. They had played a show near Cincinnati, and this kid with bright blue eyes and spikey black hair had somehow made it backstage. The older man didn’t remember much about the show, he was pretty strung out, but he did remember said kid telling him about how his band was going to be the biggest in the world.

Andy looked much different now that he wasn’t an awkward teenager anymore. Guess he had made his way out to Hollywood like he said he would.

“You do remember.” Andy smiled, stirring his drink with a straw, his pale cheeks flushed a light pink.

“Mm I do, and I have to say, I like the new look. It suits you.” Ronnie purred, wanting nothing more than to skip to the part of the night where his teeth would be buried in the boy’s neck.

The look in Andy’s eyes gave away what he wanted. And Ronnie had never wanted to please someone so much before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be longer, just trying to get something up <3


	3. The Lips of Evil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Violence, strong language, explicit sexual content

**Chapter Two: The Lips of Evil**

Ronnie ran his tongue over his fangs, watching lustfully as the younger man’s hips swayed with each step, leading them both through the bar towards the back exit. A simple invite to go smoke outside was the chance he needed to get away from all the people. God, he hoped he didn’t kill this one.

Andy glanced back at the older man before pushing the back door open and stepping out into the cool night air. The blue-eyed singer wondered how long it would take for the man to make a move on him. He clearly seemed interested, but then again there were very few times that Andy didn’t get his way. Most people found him hard to resist, something that definitely boosted his already inflated ego.

“So, did you get everything you wanted for your birthday?” Ronnie asked, leaning against the brick wall as he took a drag from his cigarette.

“Not everything.” The younger man shrugged, taking his place beside the other man.

Andy tilted his head back, blowing smoke into the night sky. Ronnie had to fight to keep control of himself at the sight of the boy’s beautiful pale flesh. No silver necklaces on him, just a black rosary. Thank god that part of the myth was bullshit.

“Oh yeah, and what would that be?” The older man swallowed hard; Andy’s scent was absolutely intoxicating.

The boy bit his lip ring, drawing attention to it. _Fuck, how did I not notice that_ Ronnie cursed himself? Well there was a chance it wasn’t really silver, a chance the older man was willing to take for such an extortionary payoff. How could he say no to what the kid was clearly offering?

Andy only laughed in response, the sound sealing his fate. Ronnie was hooked. After a year of feeding off sleazy inmates, this was something he couldn’t resist. If Andy tasted as good as he looked, the vampire wasn’t sure he’d be able to stop.

“You’re going to get yourself in trouble.” The older man growled in a seductive voice.

“Maybe trouble’s what I want…” 

Ronnie was done talking, he’d had enough waiting, he wanted more, and he wanted it now. He stepped in front of the boy, placing a hand on either side of his head; caging him. Andy’s heartbeat rung in his ears, but it wasn’t from fear, quite the opposite. The poor thing had no idea how much danger he was really in, how easily his life could come to an end. Here he was hoping for some drunken birthday hook up; _stupid human_.

Ronnie moved a hand to the boy’s neck, slowly and teasingly wrapping his fingers around it. He could feel the singer’s racing pulse and drove him insane. The older man tightened his grip, earning a soft moan from Andy. Of course, he would like to be choked…

Andy gasped as the man suddenly slammed him back against the brick in a move of dominance, tattooed fingers still wrapped around his throat. He felt himself get hard, turned on at the thought of being under the older man’s complete control. Did that make him fucked up?

“You’re a little whore, aren’t you?” Ronnie teased, brushing his thumb over the singer’s lips.

_Nope. Not really silver_. He was in the clear.

“I just know what I want,” Andy smirked, parting his lips and gently nipping at the man’s thumb.

Ronnie jerked the singer into him, wrapping one hand around his waist, the other grabbing a fist full of his silky black hair. Andy seemed to melt into him, his full lips begging to be kissed. The older man tugged on the boy’s hair roughly, tilting his head back before closing the gap between their lips.

Andy reached up, wrapping his arms around the older man and deepening the kiss. It was surprisingly slow and passionate, and it made his heart skip a beat. Who would have thought he’d be hooking up with Ronnie fucking Radke on his 20th birthday?

“Where do you want to do this?” the younger man whispered, kissing up the man’s jaw, his fingertips running up and down the man’s arms.

“Mm, my car’s just around the block.” _God this kid is stupid_ , Ronnie thought to himself, lacing his fingers with Andy’s and pulling him towards the alley.

Andy smiled, following the older man to his car. The singer never thought about the danger he could get himself in, never thought that the sleazy guys he went home with might have malicious intentions. He was young, attractive, and had the sex drive of a fucking rabbit. So, the thought of following a convicted felon down a dark alley didn’t bother him as much as it probably should have.

He climbed into the back seat of the car, biting at his thumb as Ronnie turned the car on, cranking the heat and the radio up. Andy slipped his leather jacket off, tossing it into the front seat.

The older man glanced back at the shirtless singer, he didn’t normally go for guys but fuck this one was pretty. His skin was flawless, and his body was breathtaking, it was a shame he was probably going to die.

Ronnie joined the boy in the back, there was barely enough room for the two of them, but he’d make it work. He certainly couldn’t have the kid screaming and risk being caught, so his car it was. There was no way he was going back to prison.

“God… you are just… stunning.” The older man mused, running a finger down the boy’s naked torso.

“Thanks, I’ve heard that before.” Andy purred, watching lustfully as Ronnie pulled his shirt off, his taunt muscles seeming to glow in the moonlight.

As much as the older man wanted to fuck the singer, he debated just going for his neck. The closeness of the car was pushing him to the edge of his self-control, it had been almost two days since the last time he fed, he was starving.

Andy’s thin fingers were at the man’s belt before he could make up his mind, skillfully unbuckling it and tossing it aside with the rest of their clothes. He wasn’t lying about knowing what he wanted. He watched as Andy unzipped his jeans, freeing his throbbing erection. Fuck, maybe he would get off first, why not?

“Jesus-” Ronnie cursed as he felt Andy’s lips around his cock; he didn’t know if the kid was any good at singing, but his tongue was definitely talented-

The older man brushed the boy’s hair out of his face, leaning his head back and enjoying the sensation. “Mm, come on love, all the way.”

He pushed the singer’s head down, forcing him to take his whole length. Andy gagged as the man’s cock hit the back of his throat. He tried to pull back, but Ronnie just pushed his head down farther. Andy submitted, moaning around the man’s cock and causing more expletives to slip from Ronnie’s lips.

Without warning Ronnie suddenly yanked him back by the hair, forcing him onto his stomach. His skintight pants pulled down to his ankles in a flash. A hand caressed his bare ass, sending a shiver down his spine.

Andy let out a yelp as the older man slapped his ass, the delicate skin turning hot and red. Ronnie grabbed a small bottle of lube from the center console before leaning down over the boy, placing kisses and nips up his back and neck. He could practically taste the blood running through Andy’s veins.

“So... fucking… perfect.” He whispered, popping the lid to the bottle and coating three of his fingers, no use causing the poor thing too much pain… at least not yet.

Andy moaned as the older man slipped a finger into him. “Fuck…” the singer gasped as Ronnie curled his finger, brushing up against his prostate. “Stop teasing me and fuck me” the younger man whimpered.

“Well if you insist, doll,” Ronnie said in a dark voice, the eagerness of the boy turning him on.

Andy dug his nails into the upholstery of the seat, baring his teeth to keep from crying out as the older man pushed into him. Ronnie moved his hips slowly at first, letting the boy get used to the feeling. _So, fucking tight_ … this sure beat the whores he’d fucked his first night as a free man.

Ronnie kept a hand on the boy’s hip, his fingers pressing into the skin hard enough to leave bruises. The other hand wrapped around the singer’s throat. Andy was quite the vocal lover, crying out each time Ronnie hit just the right spot. Panting, gasping, and moaning with each thrust.

“F-Fuck, h-harder,” Andy begged, stoking himself along with the man’s thrusts.

Oh, he could give it to him harder, Andy had no idea what he was up against. Ronnie let his eyes slip shut, getting lost in the euphoric feeling. His gut tightened, forcing him to slow down, he didn’t want this to be over too quickly. He repositioned his hips, forcefully pushing Andy’s head down into the seat as he pounded into him.

Andy gasped for breath, arching his back as he felt the muscles in his body tighten. “Fuck, I’m gonna come, don’t stop” he moaned, stroking his cock faster.

“Come for me, slut.” Ronnie growled, feeling his own climax building.

Andy’s body shook as he came over his hand, moaning the other man’s name. This was Ronnie’s chance; he leaned over the trembling boy, sinking his fangs into Andy’s neck.

“Ah-ah” Andy gasped, his body paralyzed from the euphoria and shock, completely oblivious to what was happening.

The taste of blood was enough to send the man over the edge, coming hard inside the singer. Andy’s blood was just as intoxicating as Ronnie had thought it would be, sweeter than any heroin he’d ever shot up. Fuck… he couldn’t get enough.

Andy’s eyes fluttered open, he felt lightheaded and dazed, like he was going to blackout. Ronnie’s hand was still wrapped around his throat, his cock still buried in his ass. Something didn’t feel right though. He tried to scream but it was as if all the muscles in his body were frozen. The singer clawed at the man’s hand, feeling something warm trickling down his neck.

“R-Ronnie… l-let go…”

Ronnie was so lost in the pleasure that he barely heard the boy’s pleas to let go. In the year he’d been feeding, he’d never experienced it like this before. He’d drank from hundreds of people, but this… this was akin to the first time he tried smack. Absolute nirvana.

He could feel Andy’s pulse slowing, mere minutes and he’d be dead. Fuck he had to stop. It took all of his strength to pull back, his fangs retracting behind his lips. Andy went limp, collapsing against the seat, barely conscious.

_Shit… fuck, don’t be dead_. Ronnie pressed his fingers to the boy’s neck, feeling a weak pulse, _thank god_. Andy rolled onto his back; crystal blue eyes hardly able to stay open.

“W-What did you did you do to me?” Andy whispered, his vision fading in and out.

“Nothing, sweetheart. I think you just had too much to drink.” Ronnie lied, caressing Andy’s cheek.

He wasn’t sure if it was the effects of blood loss or just another ability, but people tended to be very impressionable after he fed. He could convince them of almost anything, that was of course if he didn’t kill them. As far as Andy would remember, he drank too much, hooked up with him, and woke up the next morning. He wouldn’t even question the strange marks on his neck, they never did.

“Mm… oh yeah... I guess I did.” Andy’s eyes closed as he started to lose his grip on consciousness.

Ronnie looked down at the boy, a strange feeling coming over him. He’d heard talks about it before, from the other guys like him at the prison. None of them had ever experienced it, only heard rumors, that for every creature out there a human match existed. A human with blood so irresistible it would act like wine, and a bond so powerful it would overtake them. The odds were, they would never find each other. But if they somehow did, it would take an act of God to separate them.

Ronnie never believed in all that bullshit, it sounded like some made up, twisted nightmare of a fairy tale. Attached to someone for all eternity by a supernatural blood bond? No, not him.

The older man pulled the singer’s tights back up, pausing and watching as the boy’s chest rose and fell with each breath. It was probably just something those assholes made up in their cells, prison had a way of playing your mind.


	4. The Drug in Me Is You

**Chapter Three: The Drug in Me Is You**

Andy woke up feeling like death. He was still in his street clothes, having not bothered to take them off when he got home. In fact, he didn't even remember getting back to Jake’s apartment. The night was a blur. The one thing he did recall was getting fucked in Ronnie’s car. What a hell of a birthday.

He didn’t think he drank that much but based on the splitting headache he woke up with, he must have. Oh well, it was his birthday party. Who would blame him for getting wasted?

Andy laid back on his mattress, staring up at the ceiling. The apartment he shared with Jake was a shit hole, and even that was giving it too much credit. The ceiling was water damaged, and the walls stained from years of smoking. It was all he could afford though, and at least it had running water.

One day he’d have his own place, a respectable one he could actually be proud of. The band was on their way to greatness, the new album was going to be huge.

The singer’s muscles screamed in pain as he stood up, feeling lightheaded. He stumbled into the living room, his head pounding. Jake was sitting on the couch, his eyes intensely focused on a video game.

“Hey, you’re alive!” the guitarist chuckled, noticing Andy’s presence.

“Fucking barely, I don’t remember shit from last night. What happened?” Andy asked, making his way into the kitchen.

The fridge was empty, except for alcohol, Gatorade, and some questionable leftovers. He grabbed the bottle of Gatorade, chugging the blue liquid as fast as he could. Fuck, he normally didn’t get this hungover.

“Dude, you disappeared. Jinxx and I tried looking for you, but we figured you were staying at someone’s place. You came stumbling in the door at like four in the morning.” Jake replied.

Andy braced himself against the kitchen counter as a wave of nausea came over him. Chugging the sugary drink wasn’t the best idea. If Jake didn’t drive him home, then Ronnie must have. Either that or he’d walked from the bar back home.

“Yeah, I don’t remember getting back at all.” The singer chuckled, tossing the empty bottle in the trash.

“Nice love bites… who was the lucky guy?” Jake snickered, pausing his game and motioning to the younger man’s neck.

“Shit… do I have hickeys?” Andy’s hand shot up to his neck.

It was tender as his fingers brushed against what felt like raised bite marks. Ronnie had been rough, he remembered that part. At least it had been good sex, too bad that it would never happen again. That was disappointing. Too many of the men Andy had flings with didn’t know what they were doing. 

Truth was that most of them were vanilla as fuck. They were all insecure about their own sexualities. Always begging him not to tell anyone. It beat the losers in Ohio, but surely Hollywood had more to offer. Andy felt kind of bad for Jake, he had kept the man up way too many nights thanks to the thin apartment walls.

“It looks like you fucked a vampire last night. Have you not looked in the mirror?”

“I just woke up” Andy made his way into the living room, plopping down in the chair beside his roommate.

“Well yeah, whoever it was did some damage. Not to mention you came home looking like death, you were so pale and out of it.” Jake added.

“Was I? Hm.” _Did someone spike my drink_? Andy wondered to himself. That would explain the strange hangover.

“CC said Ronnie swung by the bar last night, did you hear he moved to LA.? He’s got a new band or something.” Jake shrugged, tossing his controller aside. The words ‘game over’ flashing across the screen.

“Oh? How interesting.” Andy played dumb, chipping at the paint on his nails.

Jake glanced over at the singer, noting Andy’s uncharacteristic silence. “Did you see him? I know you were a fan of his old band or something.”

“Yeah… uh, I ran into him…” Andy bit at his lip ring, hoping Jake would drop the subject. One-night stands are supposed to die with the morning sun.

“Oh my god… did you? Ronnie? Andy, he just got out of prison!” The older man exclaimed, his eyes going wide with shock.

Jake saw himself as somewhat of an older brother to Andy. He was one of the first people the younger man had gotten to know after moving to the city. Andy was an adult, but sometimes his choices concerned the guitarist.

Andy rubbed the back of his neck, hiding his flushed cheeks behind a veil of black hair. “We uh… might have, yeah.”

“Wow… well, damn… didn’t know he went that way.” The guitarist stammered. Unsure if he should congratulate the singer or smack him upside the head for fucking a felon

Andy inspected his ‘love bites’ in the mirror, poking at the deep purple bruises. There was no missing the marks, Ronnie had done a number on him. It wasn’t the first time he'd woken up with them. Thank god for scarves and strategically placed war paint. These were pretty extreme though. It looked like he’d even broken the skin.

Besides the obvious marks, his skin was pale. It was probably just dehydration, the singer told himself, not too worried about it. He started the shower, stripping his clothes off as he waited for it to warm up. He looked down, noticing the bruises along his hip bones. _Goddamn, the dude sure liked to mark his territory_.

Andy scrubbed at his skin, washing away the scent of sex and alcohol. His mind kept drifting to the backseat of Ronnie’s car. It had been so long since he’d been that _satisfied_. He kind of wished he’d asked for the man’s number. Even if it was just for one more night, Andy wanted to see him again.

\---

Ronnie had been up all night and into the early morning. After dropping the dazed and confused singer off, he’d gone home and looked the band up. The kid had some pipes on him, not surprising after the night they’d had. The band was good, they seemed to have a very dedicated fan base. Ronnie had been more interested in the blue-eyed singer though.

He searched through photos, tweets, videos, and interviews. Trying to learn as much as he could on the boy. Andy was a cocky, spit-fire frontman, a larger than life character. It was such a contrast to the sixteen-year-old he’d met back in Ohio. Ronnie wondered how much of it was genuine, and how much was an act.

Did it make him weird that he’d spent hours googling the kid’s name? It wasn’t too strange; he’d fucked him in the back of his car. That warranted a little post-hook-up snooping. The longer he looked, the more the intense feeling in his chest grew. He could still taste Andy’s blood; he wanted more. He couldn’t shake the memories.

Ronnie looked over at the small black wallet beside him. It must have fallen out of Andy’s jacket. What a perfect excuse to see him again. After almost killing him, the vampire wanted to check on him. The boy had been so out of it that Ronnie wasn’t sure he’d make it to his front door.

Wanting to see Andy again didn’t make the rumors true, right?

Ronnie adjusted his sunglasses. The twilight skies were still a little too bright for his liking. He looked up at the shitty apartment complex. Of course, after living in a prison cell for two years, he couldn’t say much.

His boots clicked as he made his way to the door he’d seen Andy go into the night before. It hadn’t even occurred to him that the singer might not be home.

Andy looked up from his phone at the sound of someone knocking on the front door. It was probably one of the guys coming to see if they wanted to go out drinking.

“You expecting someone?” Jake asked, getting up to go answer it.

“Not that I know of. You did pay rent this month, right?” Andy teased before turning his attention back to the text message he was composing.

Jake opened the door, blinking in surprise when he saw the tattooed singer in the doorway. Ronnie flashed a friendly smile, holding the wallet up.

“Is Andy home? I think he left this at the bar last night.” He spoke, glancing over Jake’s shoulder.

“Hey Andy, you’ve got a visitor.” The guitarist called into the apartment.

Andy tucked his phone in his back pocket. He made it a few steps towards the door before coming to a halt, his eyes going wide when he saw Ronnie. The man looked even more beautiful in proper lighting. His luscious brown hair pushed back out of his face and his skin had a radiant glow to it.

Andy suddenly felt self-conscious about the sweatpants and t-shirt he was wearing. Ronnie, on the other hand, looked dashing in his studded red leather jacket. _What is he doing here?_ Maybe he was looking for a round two; Andy could only hope.

Jake looked between the two, taking his queue to leave. He raised an eyebrow at Andy as he passed him, leaving the two men alone.

Andy stepped out onto the porch, shutting the door behind him. “Um… hey…”

“You left this in my car last night.” Ronnie held the wallet out, taking in the sight of the younger man.

Andy looked a lot smaller without his hair teased up and all the makeup. Ronnie couldn’t take his eyes off the boy. He was a natural beauty, every bit as stunning as he was the night before.

“Oh shit, I was wondering where that was,” Andy exclaimed, taking the wallet. Their fingertips brushed against each other’s, sending a shock wave through the older man.

Andy shivered as a gust of cold air swept through. Ronnie didn’t miss the days of being a slave to the elements. Should he offer Andy his coat? That would be too much. Now that the wallet was returned, he didn’t have a reason to stick around. He should leave but he didn’t want to.

“Thanks for taking me home last night, I guess. I actually don’t remember much.” Andy laughed, pulling a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket.

“You were pretty drunk. How are you feeling? Not too hungover I hope.” The older man’s eyes went to Andy’s bruised neck.

“I felt like shit this morning. Oh, and thanks for these.” Andy pointed to the marks.

“It was my pleasure, darling.” Ronnie’s voice was low and seductive as he leaned in.

The younger man felt his heart skip a beat. He felt drawn to the man, his presence both unnerved him and calmed him at the same time. Andy took a long drag from his cigarette, hoping the nicotine would bring him to his senses. It was a one-night stand, he didn’t need to catch feelings.

“It was fun,” Andy smirked, leaning against the brick wall.

Ronnie had to find a reason to spend more time with the boy. The thought of going their separate ways for good was eating at him.

“It was… definitely something I would do again.” The older man replied.

Andy smiled softly, looking down at his feet. It melted Ronnie’s heart.

“I wouldn’t object to that…” the younger man smirked, putting his cigarette out.

“Why don’t I give you my number, and you can let me know the next time you’re in… need.” Ronnie purred, holding his hand out.

Andy resisted the urge to say ‘now’. He handed his phone over, watching as Ronnie’s fingers tapped across the screen. Still in a state of shock, it was hard to believe that the man he’d grown up listening to was now on his front doorstep.

“I’ll be looking forward to hearing from you.” Ronnie grinned, handing the phone back.

“Oh, and by the way.” He added, “I listened to your band, you’re not too bad…” and with that, he was on his way. The moon was up, and the night was young.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates will be a bit slower, my classes started back up today. But I will still be updating this and my Matt/Andy story.


	5. Trying to Consume

**Chapter Four: Trying to Consume**

_January 1, 2011 3:45 A.M._

“F-Fuck… harder…” Andy screamed out in ecstasy. His nails digging into the older man’s back as he fucked him against the wall. 

Ronnie buried his face in the singer’s neck, gripping his thighs as he pounded into him. His fangs exposed, ready to sink into Andy’s neck. He needed another hit. Nothing had come close to comparing to the rush he got from the younger man’s blood.

The older man had gotten the text from Andy that he was leaving a New Year’s party but wasn’t ready to go home. He jumped on the chance. They had been messaging back and forth since he’d given the boy his number. But this was the first time they’d been face to face since that day.

Ronnie had hoped his infatuation would fade after their initial hookup. If anything, it had only grown stronger. He couldn’t get Andy off his mind. Finally, he had him where he wanted him again. This time he would make sure not to almost drain him.

“I’m gonna come, fuck, I’m gonna come.” Andy moaned, the euphoria washing over him. Distracting him enough for Ronnie to make his move.

Andy gasped as he felt a sharp pain in his neck, quickly replaced by an intense feeling of pleasure. He held onto the other man as he rode out his orgasm, oblivious to the blood running down his neck.

Ronnie couldn’t hold out any longer, coming with one final thrust as he drank from Andy. The taste was as intoxicating as the first time. It was the best drug he’d ever had, and he’d tried them all. He had to force himself to stop before Andy would notice the blood loss. Retracting his fangs and licking the drops of blood from his flesh.

Andy’s legs were still shaking as the other man pulled out of him, setting him back down on his feet. He leaned his head against Ronnie’s chest, still trying to catch his breath.

CC had invited the band to a New Year’s party at his friend’s condo. It had been fun, there was lots of alcohol and people. But the whole time all Andy could think about was how much he wanted to ring in the new year a different way. He texted Ronnie, half expecting him to already be asleep or passed out somewhere.

The singer was pleasantly surprised to learn that the older man lived only a few blocks away from the party. And that he was very much, _up_.

Ronnie’s place was a lot nicer than his. A decent sized condo that he seemed to actually care enough about to keep up. Not that Andy got a house tour; they two headed straight to the bedroom. There was a massive king-sized bed with black silk sheets. All the windows decked out in blackout curtains. Quite impressive.

“God, you’re amazing.” Ronnie chuckled, placing kisses over the bite marks.

Andy swayed, feeling lightheaded. He closed his eyes, waiting for the feeling to pass. “Mm, you’re not so bad yourself.”

Fuck, he’d drank too much again. The older man guided the singer to the bed, letting him lay back on the freshly made sheets. Andy had the most beautiful face; every feature was perfection. The feeling it elicited in his chest was beyond comparison to anything else. Never in his twenty-seven years of life (or death), was he ever so consumed by someone. The thought of harm coming to Andy, or even sadness was unbearable.

Since being turned, he cared significantly less about the wellbeing of strangers. Even people he knew. That was until Andy. Ronnie had been in love before, a couple of times. This was something entirely new. He didn’t even know if it was love or pure obsession.

_It’ll pass_ , he told himself.

“Fuck, what time is it?” Andy groaned, sitting up.

He pushed his hair back, only to have it fall into his face again. The exhaustion was hitting him, and he wasn’t sure he could even make it back home.

“It’s almost five in the morning.” Ronnie chuckled, glancing over the blackout curtains.

The sun would be up soon, which meant it was time for him to retire to bed. Andy stumbled as he got up, trying to find the rest of his clothing. Ronnie’s hands shot out to steady him, but the singer brushed him off.

“Shit, I’ve got to get going…” Andy mumbled, looking for his phone.

The older man stood up, placing his hand on the boy’s arm. “Why don’t you stay… you’re more than welcome to spend the night.”

Andy turned around, facing the man. Ronnie’s expression softened into a smile, causing the singer’s knees to feel week. He looked over at the bed. It would be nice to sleep somewhere other than a mattress on the floor. It would also be nice to sleep curled up next to someone for a change. The younger man saw himself as somewhat of a loner, but some nights he yearned for more.

“You don’t mind?” Andy questioned.

“Of course, I don’t mind. Not as long as you don’t mind picking up where we left off later.” Ronnie smirked, leaning in and kissing the boy.

Ronnie guided him to the edge of the bed, sitting him back down. “Can I get you anything, love?”

“Uh… maybe some water. Those drinks I had at the party are hitting me.” Andy laughed, slightly concerned that he couldn’t shake the dizzy feeling.

Ronnie nodded, the door clicking shut behind him. Andy shook his head, fuck, _why am I so drunk?_ He stood up, using the bedframe to guide himself towards the bathroom.

The florescent lights hurt his eyes as he flipped the switch on. His hair was a tangled mess from being yanked and pulled. His makeup was running, and his neck was once again covered in fresh marks. Andy’s brows furrowed, poking at two particularly nasty ones. It looked like Ronnie had broken the skin.

Andy washed his makeup off, doing his best to comb the knots out of his hair with his fingers. He gave the strange marks another glance, leaning in towards the mirror to get a closer view.

“Sorry about those…” Ronnie chuckled, appearing in the doorway without a sound.

Andy jumped, feeling his heart skip a beat. He cursed under his breath, placing a hand on his chest. “Fuck, you scared the shit out of me.”

“I’m sorry, doll,” Ronnie spoke softly, handing the younger man a bottle of water.

“Thanks…” Andy took a sip, closing his eyes and waiting for the dizzy feeling to pass.

Ronnie frowned, realizing that he’d taken too much blood again. Andy looked like he was going to faint. The older man offered a hand, helping the boy back into the bedroom. He should have waited longer to drink from him again. Andy hardly had time to recover from their initial encounter.

It didn’t take long for the younger man to fall asleep, his heartbeat slowing. Andy looked so beautiful as he slept, so peaceful. Ronnie reached out, stroking his cheek. He didn’t want to miss a minute of the boy’s company. He could go a while without sleep for a night, days even.

Ronnie wished he could capture the moment and keep it forever. Being immortal on its face, seemed like a blessing. He didn’t have to worry about getting sick, aging, or getting hurt. Except for silver or stake through his heart, he was invincible. There was a downside, a heartbreaking trade-off. He was cursed with watching anyone he loved or cared about grow old and die.

He would never age, which meant eventually people would start to catch on. He could fake it for a while, pass it off as good genetics. But questions would start to arise after a while, ones he wouldn’t be able to answer. He would have to abandon whatever life he made for himself, and everyone in it. Start over.

Any human who found a way into his still, cold heart would shatter it. The passing of time or their mortality would take them away. Leaving only memories to haunt him for eternity.

It was something he thought about, he did a lot of thinking in prison. Yet, he’d never faced that reality in real life. Until now. Andy was mortal, fragile, vulnerable. A freak accident or illness, that’s all it would take. He would get older, and eventually, Ronnie would have to let him go.

If there was such a thing as a blood bond between humans and vampires, it was a cruel joke. The older man was starting to doubt his disbelief.

Ronnie knocked on the bathroom door, wincing as he heard Andy get sick again. The boy had been in there for an hour. He’d locked the door, keeping the older man out. Hangovers; Ronnie didn’t miss those one bit.

“Andy… are you okay in there?” he asked, leaning his forearm against the door.

Andy groaned, his head spinning. What a wonderful start to the new year he thought to himself, laying down against the bathroom tile. It was another hangover from hell. His body felt weak and heavy, and his stomach was anything but happy.

He’d woken up around noon, feeling like absolute shit. According to his phone, it was now a little after one. He had to be in the studio to track vocals in a matter of hours, and after throwing up for an hour he doubted it would go well.

“Andy? Open the door…” Ronnie called from the bedroom.

“No, just give me a few more minutes…” Andy mumbled, closing his eyes.

Ronnie sighed, giving up. He felt partly responsible for the state Andy was in. The blood loss wasn’t helping his situation.

The older man made his way into the kitchen, starting a pot of coffee. He looked around the cabinets, hoping there would be something for Andy to eat. While he could eat food, he didn’t find it appealing anymore. It all tasted bland and disappointing. Nope, nothing. If Andy coming over was going to be a regular thing, he would need to go grocery shopping.

The coffee should at least help his headache. That was something.

“Why do you have blackout curtains in the living room?” Andy asked, finally having pulled himself together.

The singer looked around the room. He hadn’t had the chance to take everything in last night. The apartment was set up beautifully. Nice furniture, marble kitchen countertops, and various pieces of art decorated it. Every window had thick black curtains blocking out all the sunlight, it was a bit strange.

“You a vampire or something?” the younger man joked, making his way into the kitchen.

Ronnie felt adrenaline shoot through him in response to the word. There was no way Andy had already figured it out, was there? No, he was being stupid. It was a joke.

“Funny. No, I have a strange sleep schedule. Jail fucked up my circadian rhythm.” he responded, trying to seem unbothered.

He glanced over at the boy who was now sitting at the kitchen table. Andy’s face was pale, even his lips were several shades lighter. He looked miserable, his small frame shaking from the chills.

“Do you… feel better now?” Ronnie asked, biting his lip.

“Not really… fuck, I guess I drank too much at the party.” Andy sat up, dragging his hands down his face. “which is great because I’ve got two hours before I’m supposed to be in the studio.”

“Shit… well, the coffee is almost ready. That should help your head.”

Ronnie turned around, keeping his back to Andy as he got two coffee cups out. There _was_ a way he could help the boy. Vampire blood didn’t only turn people, it could heal them too. As long as they didn’t die with it in their system, there wasn’t an issue. Ronnie had never tried it before, he didn’t care to. He'd seen others use the trick in prison though. He couldn’t stand to watch Andy suffer anymore, not if there was some way he could help him.

The chances were low that anything would happen. Andy would be fine. He glanced back over at the younger man before pouring coffee into the cups. Pressing his fingertip against his fang, he pierced the skin. Squeezing a small drop of blood into Andy’s before turning back around.

“Here, it’s double strength so don’t down it.” Ronnie set the mug in front of Andy, taking a seat beside him.

“Thanks… I’ll take any relief I can get right now.” Andy groaned, taking a sip.

Ronnie watched in amazement as the color started to return in the singer’s face. He perked up, his eyes no longer bloodshot.

“Shit, you weren’t kidding. This stuff is strong… I uh, feel much better.” Andy stated, feeling noticeably more alive and alert.

Whatever kind of coffee Ronnie had, he needed to buy some. He didn’t just feel better, he felt like he’d had the best sleep of his life. The singer wasn’t going to question it, he was grateful enough for the throbbing headache to be a thing of the past.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Five: Heroin**

Andy’s voice was a mixture of honey and whiskey. Sweet but with a rawness that left you wanting more. Ronnie watched the singer in the vocal booth, memorized by his beauty and talent. The way his eyebrow would arch, lips curling up into a smirk during certain parts of the song. How the boy’s crystal blue eyes kept meeting his.

The singer was shirtless, except for a cropped leather jacket. Impossibly tight skinny jeans hugged the contours of his body like a glove. His neck riddled with dark purple and blue bruises. The urge to walk into the vocal booth and pin him against the wall weighed on the older man’s mind.

Ronnie had completely lost track of time. Ignoring the repeated phone calls from his manager. The world didn’t matter outside the walls of the studio. Nothing had mattered since he ran into Andy at the bar. A part of him felt pathetic, weak. Never in his life had someone held so much power over him or occupied so much of his thoughts.

If the whole blood bond thing was true, did Andy feel it too? Or was it just him, at the mercy of some human?

Andy stepped out of the vocal booth, grabbing his bottle of red wine. He was fairly tipsy, having put a dent in the bottle. After his miraculous hangover cure, he figured why not.

He held up a pack of cigarettes, nodding towards the door. Ronnie had stuck around for tracking. Promising something about getting food after. Andy tried to hide it, but he was starting to enjoy the man’s company. He told himself it was the sex, but he knew it was more.

Catching feelings for someone, especially someone like Ronnie was stupid. He wanted to have fun, not be tied down by relationships and emotions. He’d been there, done that. Got his heartbroken and didn’t care to repeat it.

“You sounded really good…” Ronnie smiled, leaning against the brick wall.

He blew a smoke ring out, extending a hand. Andy walked over, allowing the man to snake an arm around his waist.

The way his heart skipped a beat whenever the older man would touch him made him want to break his rules. He was supposed to be a one-night stand, and yet here he was.

“Thanks…” Andy replied, leaning into the man’s touch.

Ronnie caressed the singer’s face, letting his cigarette fall to the ground. Closing the distance between their lips. Andy parted his lips, allowing the other man’s tongue entrance. Ronnie’s fingers laced in his hair, gripping onto it with dominance.

“I can’t keep my fucking hands off you.” The older man growled, holding the sides of Andy’s face.

“Who says you have to?” Andy purred, giving the man a seductive smirk.

“I don’t want to share you with anyone, does that make me selfish?” Ronnie chuckled, not realizing what he was saying until the words were already out of his mouth.

Andy raised an eyebrow, “You don’t want to share me? You should know I don’t like to be tied down by anything… or anyone.”

Andy’s back hit the bricks, almost knocking the wind out of him. Ronnie’s tattooed fingers wrapped around his jaw. He could hear the boy’s heart beating rapidly in his chest.

“I have a feeling you love to be tied down.” The older man smirked, his eyes going down to Andy’s bruised neck.

“Maybe you’ll find out. After you buy me food like you promised.” The singer replied.

Ronnie released the grip on the boy’s jaw. Straightening his jacket out, “Well played, dear. I thought you had forgotten about that.”

\---

Ronnie offered to take Andy to any restaurant he wanted. Expecting the singer to pick something fancy and expensive. Instead, Andy had picked some fast food joint. And of all the things on the menu, he’d gotten a kid’s meal. Ronnie found it adorable. He missed the taste of real food, or at least how it used to taste. All the greasy burgers and pizza he used to eat on tour. Binging on junk food when he was drunk. It all tasted the same after he turned. In fact, most of it was repulsive now.

“Well darling, should I drop you off at home?” the older man asked, sticking his key in the ignition. 

A twinge of sadness went through him at the thought of having to go home alone. The more time he spent with Andy, the more he craved. The feelings of infatuation were giving rise to new ones. Namely, a strong desire to protect the boy. Humans are fragile. That meant as tough as Andy portrayed himself to be, in the end, he was mortal. As long as Ronnie was around him, he could protect him. But once he was out of sight, anything could happen.

Wanting to protect a human instead of ripping them to shreds, that was new. What would Andy think if he found out the truth? Would he be scared? Repulsed? Would he even believe it?

“Hm… I guess I should go home…” Andy replied, frowning.

He didn’t want to go back to Jake’s. Sleeping on a mattress alone wasn’t appealing after the night he’d spent at Ronnie’s. He would never admit it, but he liked the idea of having something more meaningful than a fling. Being vulnerable and having emotions wasn’t his style, at least that’s what he tried to convey.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. You’re welcome to stay another night.” Ronnie pressed.

“I would need to grab some clean clothes and stuff…” Andy felt a fluttery sensation in his stomach. God, I need to stop, he berated himself.

“So, it’s settled then. We’ll stop by your place and then it’s off to mine. How does red wine sound for dessert?”

“Just don’t let me drink too much this time.” Andy laughed. “I don’t want to wake up fucking puking again.”

“Deal.” Ronnie hit the gas, pulling onto the highway.

Andy unlocked the front door, having to wiggle the key to make it work. It seemed that almost everything in the apartment was broken or in the process of breaking.

Jake was sitting in the living room, once again playing video games. Andy tried to sneak by him, hoping to avoid any questions about where he had been. It was no use.

“Dude, there you are. I was getting kind of worried about you.” The guitarist said, pausing his game. “Where did you run off to last night after the party?”

Andy rubbed his neck, trying to hide his new bruises and marks. Was that really a question Jake had to ask? By now he thought the man would get used to his disappearing acts and what they entailed.

“I uh… stayed at someone’s place.” He answered.

“Was it Ronnie’s. Are you guys a thing or something?”

The singer bit his lip. Were they a thing? He didn’t think so, at least not yet. They were fooling around and having fun. The guy had just gotten out of prison, he probably didn’t want to jump into anything serious.

“No, no… just… well you know… hanging out.” His cheeks heated up as Jake gave him a weird look.

“You’re not catching feelings for him, right? I mean, it’s your life but… Andy, the guy is a felon.”

Andy rolled his eyes, “No, of course not. Anyways, I came by to get some stuff. But I’ll be back tomorrow.”

The singer hurried into his bedroom. Throwing some clothes and his phone charger into a backpack. He grabbed his toothbrush and toothpaste from the bathroom before heading back into the living room. He didn’t want to keep Ronnie waiting for too long.

The door clicked behind him before Jake could say anything else. Andy was relieved to see the man’s car still parked with the headlights on.

“Got everything?” Ronnie asked, adjusting his rearview mirror.

Andy nodded, reclining his seat back as the older man sped out of the parking lot. He couldn’t help but stare at the man beside him. His chiseled jawline framed by dark brown locks. A black leather jacket that hid his toned upper body. And a beautiful white smile that could melt anyone’s heart.

Maybe he was catching feelings, as stupid as that might be.

Ronnie collapsed back against the bed, the euphoria still flooding his body. He had resisted the urge to sink his fangs into the boy’s neck again. Feed off him too much and he’d get anemic. Instead, he settled for two rounds of fucking the singer until he screamed. Once over the kitchen table after destroying a bottle of wine. Then again after retiring to the bedroom to ‘rest’.

He looked over at Andy. The boy was still out of breath, his heart pounding. Ronnie forgot how easily humans tired out. He chuckled, rolling over on his side. Andy smiled at him; his cheeks still flushed a soft pink.

Andy rubbed at his neck, fresh bruises starting to form. “Fuck… my neck is never going to heal being around you.”

“Hey, you said choke you. I just did as you asked.” Ronnie said, pulling his hands up.

“Oh, I’m not complaining about that part…” Andy smirked, turning on his side to face the older man.

Andy inched closer to the other man, resting his head on Ronnie’s shoulder. Tattooed arms wrapped around him, holding him close. He didn’t know why Jake was worried, he’d never felt safer in someone’s arms. It felt natural like he belonged there. A strange feeling that he hadn’t experienced before.

He’d felt love before, and heartbreak. When he had first moved to LA, he was still a starry-eyed teenager looking for love. That didn’t last long, the industry had a way of blackening hearts. It was meaningless sex, lust, and infatuation. Nothing deeper, because odds were you would never see each other again. Not to mention, liking men only made it harder.

It was funny that the same guys who would hook up with him in secret would turn around and call him names in public. As much as he tried to tell himself he didn’t care, he knew he did deep down. Sex, drugs, and rock n’ roll is all fun and games until you find yourself alone in bed. Wishing you had someone to call yours.

Ronnie took his hand, lacing their fingers together. He pressed his lips to Andy’s knuckles, causing the boy’s heart to skip a beat.

“I think you’ve been my favorite part of my newfound freedom.” The older man said, his tone soft and gentle.

“Really? You mean after being locked in a cell for two years, sex is your favorite part of being free? How shocking.” Andy chuckled, rolling his eyes.

“I’m not going to argue that hasn’t also been amazing. But… that’s not what I said. You’ve been the best part of being free.” He repeated, emphasizing the ‘you’.

Andy looked up at the man, not sure how to respond. His lips turning upwards into a smile. “Me? Wow, I’m flattered.”

Ronnie cupped the side of the younger man’s face. Wishing he could decipher what was going on in Andy’s head. It was a shame mind-reading wasn’t among his new abilities.

He kissed the singer on the lips, wondering if he should lay his cards on the table. He knew he couldn’t fight reality anymore. The others had been telling the truth about bonds. He wasn’t completely certain; it wasn’t like there was a manual for this sort of thing. But he couldn’t imagine feeling stronger for anyone else. It was unlike anything even from his human life.

He never thought he would find something that made him feel the euphoria and high that heroin had. The first time he shot up was like seeing the face of God. Unrivaled by anything since. And then he walked into that bar the day after Christmas.

What were the chances of running into Andy not once in his life, but twice? The first time as a human, completely unaware of how his life would play out. If it was true that for every creature like him, only one human existed. He would be stupid not to at least try, wouldn’t it?

“Andy… what do you want from this?” he asked, bracing himself for any reaction.

“What do I want from what? You mean like you and me?”

“Yes.”

Andy bit his lip. Was this Ronnie’s way of seeing if their feelings were mutual? The line was already crossed between drunken hookups and something more. Had it not? Give him his heart and Ronnie might break it. Hold it back and he’d lose his chance at having the human connection he longed for. Both options made him feel vulnerable.

“I like being with you… it makes me happy. And I don’t want that feeling to stop.” Andy whispered; the nervousness evident in his voice.

“I don’t either…” The older man replied.

“You said earlier you wanted me all to yourself… and I don’t think I would mind that.” Andy smiled, brushing his lips against Ronnie’s.


	7. Chemical Prisoner

**Chapter Six: Chemical Prisoner**

_January 23 th, 2011 _

Ronnie looked down at the younger man fast asleep on his lap. He smiled, brushing the singer’s hair back. It had been Andy’s idea to watch some superhero movie Ronnie had never heard of. But he’d fallen asleep halfway through it, curled up on the couch. Using the man’s legs as a pillow.

It had been a little over three weeks since New Year’s and the start of what Ronnie figured was a relationship. They were exclusively seeing each other, that meant they were dating, right? Ronnie was never good at relationship stuff when he was human, let alone now.

Andy had all but moved into his apartment. His clothes, makeup, and shoes were all here. The younger man had spent every night in Ronnie’s bed. Most nights the Ronnie watched him as he slept, asking himself how he could be so lucky.

The only time they spent apart was when they had to go to their respective band practices. For the first time, Ronnie was starting to have hope that things would actually get better for him. Everything was going well. Andy hadn’t asked as many questions as he thought he would. Blissfully unaware that he was fast asleep next to Hollywood’s newest serial killer. And Ronnie’s band was finally starting to get traction.

He knew there would come a time when Andy would find out. Either when the time was right, and he could tell him. Or he would find out on his own. The prospects of it made the older man anxious. It wasn’t exactly a normal secret.

So far, he’d been able to keep up appearances, even suffering through eating human food. It wasn’t hard to pass off his nocturnal ways as being due to prison and tour life. Andy was far from a morning person anyway. Ronnie was smarter than to think the naivety would last forever. All the younger man had to do was feel for a heartbeat or pulse. Hard to explain why he hadn’t had either for a year.

Or he’d start to wonder about the strange marks on his neck. God forbid Andy ever wear silver jewelry. 

“Mm?” Andy stirred, pulling Ronnie out of his thoughts.

“Hey there, you have a good nap?” he chuckled, caressing the boy’s cheek.

“Fuck, did I fall asleep?” the singer asked, rubbing his eyes.

“Yeah, like forty-five minutes into the movie.”

Andy laughed, sitting up. “Shit… I was so exhausted. Rehearsals lasted for fucking ever.”

Ronnie leaned in, pecking the boy on the lips. “I didn’t mind. You’re adorable when you sleep.”

Andy made a face at the comment, “Adorable? You’re fucking lame.” He joked, resting his head against the older man’s shoulder.

He had fallen fast and hard for the man. He’d always been somewhat of a hopeless romantic, his emotions intense. But this was beyond that, he felt like a high school kid with their first crush. Less than a month ago he wasn’t in his life, except through songs. Now, Andy couldn’t imagine his life without the man.

The thought of losing him was too much to even consider. He didn’t care what people said about Ronnie. They were all wrong about him. He had been nothing but a gentleman, far from the monster people made him out to be.

Andy was in love. He knew he was, and it scared the shit out of him. It was so far from his bad-boy image. The cold and mysterious guy in a leather jacket had a heart after all. He wondered if Ronnie felt the same. Loving someone only a couple of weeks after you started dating was a bit much, right?

“Mm, maybe I am. But I’m right.” Ronnie smirked.

“Is that so Mr. Radke?” Andy purred, leaning in giving the man a seductive smile.

“Mr. Radke? You start talking like that and you’re going to get yourself in trouble, love.” Ronnie was hungry in more ways than one. He needed another hit.

Andy shrugged, standing up. Sauntering over to the bedroom door before looking back at the man still seated on the couch. “What are you going to do about it, old man?”

Ronnie chuckled at the taunting. Andy had no idea what he was capable of. If he only knew how much he was holding back.

The older man stood up; his eyes set on the singer. Andy backed up, the grin not leaving his face. His heart was beating wildly in his chest. The sense of danger turning him on. The way Ronnie carried himself, his mannerism, everything about him. It drove the younger man crazy.

Ronnie grabbed ahold of the singer’s jaw. His grip strong. “Darling, you’re playing with fire.”

Before Andy could get another word out, he was face down on the bed. Bent over it with his hands behind his back. Ronnie leaned over him, whispering in his ear. “I’m sorry were you about to say something?”

Andy felt a shiver go down his spine, the front of his pants getting tighter. “Fuck you”

“Ah- fuck” he cried out as the older man spanked him. The pain radiated from where his hand made contact.

“I still can’t hear you, babe.” Ronnie laughed.

He ran his hand up and down the singer’s ass. Andy whimpered into the pillows.

“You need to learn some manors.” Ronnie purred, lacing his fingers in the singer’s hair.

It was so long and soft. A beautiful raven black, even more beautiful wrapped up in his fist. He tugged on it, eliciting a soft moan from the boy. He enjoyed teasing Andy, making him beg for it. Andy was so cocky, almost to the point of being annoying. Yet he submitted so well.

“Now are you going to listen?” Ronnie asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Mm maybe…” He knew how to get the older man riled up.

Ronnie’s hand made contact with the younger man’s ass again. Causing him to gasp in pain, the air knocked out of him. Before he could regain his composure, Ronnie released the hold on his hair. Flipping him onto his back.

“Maybe? I thought I taught you this lesson, babe. The answer is yes, sir.” The older man smirked, leaning down to kiss the waistband of Andy’s jeans.

“Fuck…” Andy moaned, leaning his head back.

“Shirt. Off.” Ronnie demanded, standing back up. Making Andy crave more.

“Yes, sir.” He whispered, complying with the order. His voice was low and full of lust. Ronnie fucking loved it.

Andy bit his bottom lip, watching the man slip his own shirt off. His body was perfect. Toned, muscular, and covered in tattoos. He placed a hand between the boy’s thighs. Starting to rub him through his jeans.

“Why are you torturing me?” Andy groaned, grinding his hips against the man’s touch.

“Because you’re being a brat.” Ronnie scolded him, starting to undo the zipper on the boy’s jeans.

Andy bit the tip of his thumb, looking up at the man with big blue eyes. He knew Ronnie’s weaknesses. It was the most fun he’d ever had with someone in bed. He didn’t have to tell him what to do, it was like he knew. Absolutely mind-blowing.

“You can play innocent all you want, love. But we both know you’re not.” He tugged the singer’s skinny jeans off, leaving him naked on the bed.

Ronnie grabbed the bottle of lube from his nightstand, slicking his dick with it. His cock was throbbing from all the foreplay.

Andy gasped, tensing up as he felt the older man enter him. Ronnie’s tattooed fingers digging into his hip. “Fuck Ronnie…”

“God, you feel so fucking good.” Ronnie moaned, starting to build a slow and steady rhythm.

Ronnie had to close his eyes to keep from coming too soon. The sight of Andy laid out in front of him, taking every inch of his length. It was too much. With each thrust the boy would moan, sending bolts of electricity through him. This was as close as he’d ever get to feeling alive again.

“Fuck- right there” Andy called out, digging his nails into the sheets.

The younger man reached down to stroke himself, unable to hold off any longer. He wrapped his legs around Ronnie’s waist, feeling the aching in his gut building.

“Fuck, Andy… so fucking hot.” Ronnie slowed his thrust down. Going deeper and harder each time.

He could feel Andy’s muscles tightening around him as he got closer to his climax. Fuck it, it felt too good to resist any longer. He gripped the boy’s hips, pounding into him. Andy cried out his name, his legs shaking as he came. Ronnie wasn’t far behind, coming deep inside the singer.

He leaned down, sinking his fangs into the boy’s neck. Andy gasped, hardly realizing what was happening. He wrapped his arms around the man, tilting his head to the side to allow him better access. Ronnie clutched the other side of his neck, relishing in the pleasure the boy’s blood brought. Pulling back before Andy would notice the blood loss.

The younger man pulled him down onto the bed, kissing his jaw.

“Come here, doll.” He whispered, opening his arms up.

Andy rested his head on Ronnie’s chest, closing his eyes. The endorphins were still flooding his brain, making it hard to think straight. All that mattered was right now, right here.

Ronnie tilted Andy’s chin up, kissing him.

Andy looked up at the older man. His heart skipping a beat. He never imagined he could be so happy with another person. He wanted the feeling to last forever.

“I love you…” Andy whispered, shocked by the words leaving his lips.

Ronnie’s lips twisted up into a smile. “You love me?”

Andy’s eyes went wide, realizing what he’d said. “Fuck… shit, I uh… I don’t know what I said that I-”

The older man cut him off with a kiss, silencing him. “Shh, don’t apologize.”

Andy’s cheeks flushed red. Feeling embarrassed at the sudden confession.

“I love you too, Andy…” Ronnie replied, stroking the singer’s cheek.


	8. I Walk A Fine Line Between Coping and Insanity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning this chapter contains graphic depictions of blood and violence.

**Chapter Seven: I Walk A Fine Line Between Coping and Insanity**

_February 14, 2011. Whiskey A-Go-Go_

"Your little drinks are expensive. You know that, right?" Ronnie commented, setting the mixed drink in front of the boy.

Andy smirked, taking a sip of it and shrugging his shoulders. "But you just got that advance for your record. Besides, I'll make it up to you later."

The older man raised an eyebrow, "That better be a promise." he chuckled.

He sat back down in the booth, looking around the crowded venue. Andy had wanted to come to see one of his friends play at the Whiskey. Some band named Asking Alexandria. Not exactly the Valentine's Day date that Ronnie had envisioned. But as long as he ended up with Andy underneath him at the end of the night it didn't matter much.

At least they were up in the balcony, making things a little bit more private. Word had gotten around that Ronnie was out of jail and working on new music. All the dudes that had talked shit about him for two and a half years were up his ass. None of that mattered though, he was content with his life. Working on his band's first record and spending the rest of his time with Andy.

Being with Andy made him forget that he was a monster. It was the closest he got to his humanity. A grounding force in an otherwise chaotic existence.

He was a non-believer in blood bonds no more. What he felt for the younger man was not something normal biology could explain. It was intense and all-consuming but at the same time, it was calming and natural. Unlike his past relationships, he didn't have to make himself care. He didn't have to act like he was in love. This time he actually was.

The vampire watched as Andy got up. Going over to the railing to get a better view of the encore song. Ronnie was still awestruck by the boy's beauty. A slender physique with legs that went for miles. An elegant face, full lips, and the most beautiful smile. Always dressed in leather and studs. His makeup and hair impeccably done. Almost to the point of neurotic perfection. How could anyone not be in love with him?

He would do anything to make Andy happy. He'd kill for the boy. Nothing would ever harm the singer as long as he was around. Ronnie would make sure of it. It was insane to him, the way his life changed. It had been hard coming to terms with his new existence. Eternity was lonelier than people thought.

Ronne did his best to keep the thought of Andy's mortality out of his mind. The only way to preserve him would be to turn him. But what if that wasn't what Andy wanted? He didn't even know the truth about the man he claimed to love. Would Andy see it as a curse? He was such a pure soul, despite his tough exterior. Ronnie doubted he even had it in him to kill.

There was another thought that gave him pause; the bond. Would that disappear if Andy was no longer human? It was between humans and vampires. Did that mean once the human turned the spell would be broken? Would Andy become a heartless killer as Ronnie was destined to be? The guys at the prison hadn't given much detail. None of them had met their matches, and they never would. Life in prison for first-degree murder, no chance of parole.

Andy's voice brought the man out of his thoughts. The singer resting his palms against the table.

"Come do shots with me and the band. We're going to the dressing room." He repeated himself.

"You mean to tell me you had access to free alcohol this whole time. But you made me pay for overpriced drinks?" The older man chuckled.

"I might have." Andy smiled.

"You're digging your own grave, Six," Ronnie warned, standing up and stealing a quick kiss.

Andy led Ronnie into the back. No need for introductions, everyone knew who he was. The younger man laid back on the couch, happy to be away from all the lights and screaming fans.

It didn't take long before Danny was cutting up thin white lines on the coffee table. Saying something about it being a little 'Valentine's Day' fun. Ronnie's ears perked up at the mention of blow. It was always a favorite of his, but he had vowed to give that shit up. Going to prison for drugs made shit a lot more real. Getting sober made him realize how much he was trashing his body.

But then he died. And overdoses were a thing of the past. Nothing was off-limits anymore; he was free to indulge in all of life's pleasures.

"Guests first," Ben said, handing a rolled-up hundred-dollar bill to Ronnie.

He leaned over, snorting a few lines. The euphoric rush hit him like a freight train. These dudes had some good shit. Now, this was his idea of a fun night.

"Alright, Andy. Let's go." Danny said, cutting up more lines.

Ronnie's blood ran cold. Of course, he wasn't surprised that Andy seemed eager to partake. Almost everyone in the industry did this shit or at least tried it. The younger man didn't seem like a novice as he railed two lines alongside Danny. His face lighting up as he broke into laughter at a joke the man made.

The older man had to consciously tell himself to unclench his fists. The idea of Andy doing drugs made him uneasy. Ronnie had known too many people who had died doing that shit. Ruined their lives or ended up addicted. Hell, he was one of those people. He also knew how easily it escalated. It starts out with some blow, a few pills here and there. The next thing you know you're ejecting shit into your veins. Just trying to keep from getting sick.

Andy grinned, leaning his head against Ronnie's shoulder. The older man wasn't so sure he liked Andy's friends.

A couple of hours passed, the band moving to the bar after the fans cleared out. Copious amounts of alcohol and coke. Ronnie let Andy have his fun, hanging back and keeping an eye on him. With last call being announced, he took it as his queue to gather his now very intoxicated lover.

Ronnie kept one arm around the singer's waist as he guided him through the back alleys. LA parking meant they had quite the walk back to his car. Andy didn't seem to mind. He was still riding the high of his last bump. Energetic and loud. Yelling at random people.

"Andy... hush. You're going to get in trouble." Ronnie groaned, trying to cover the younger man's mouth.

"Fucking faggots!" The slur cut through the night air like a blade.

Ronnie snapped to attention; his eyes set on a man. He was sitting on the steps in the alley. Drunk and what appeared to be homeless. The man saw red, clenching his fists. He tried to calm himself. As much as he wanted to rip the man to shreds, that would be a bad idea.

"What the fuck did you just call me?" Andy growled, stepping forward.

"Andy... don't," Ronnie warned, grabbing the younger man's wrist.

Andy yanked it away, his glare set on the man.

"You heard what the fuck I said, pretty boy. Take your sin somewhere else." The man shot back; his words slurred.

Ronnie's eyes went wide as Andy reached into his leather jacket. Flicking his wrist and revealing a switchblade. _Shit... he had that the whole time_? Before the older man could get a hold of the singer he was in the guy's face.

"Andy, stop!"

Andy's heart stopped in his chest. His legs were completely frozen as he stared down the barrel of a gun. The man had pulled it on him so fast he hadn't even realized what happened.

His back hit the ground hard, knocking the wind from his lungs. The sound of the gun firing reverberated through the alley. He gasped for breath, seeing the blood splattered across his leather jacket. Dripping down from his cheeks. Time stood still as his brain tried to register what had happened. He waited for the pain to come, surely, he had been shot. But it didn't.

He felt across his chest, the panic setting in. Adrenaline shooting through his veins as he searched for a wound. He wasn't hit. The realization came with dread and fear that he didn't know he could experience. If it wasn't his blood, then...

Ronnie.

Andy screamed in horror, covering his mouth with his hands. Ronnie's chest was gushing blood, spilling out for a shot to the heart. He staggered back, as the man dropped the gun. Realizing what he had done. Ronnie had pushed the singer out of the way, and now he was shot.

It didn't feel real. It couldn't be real. It happened too fast to be real.

The singer started to shake, the shock giving way to full-blown panic. He opened his mouth to scream for help when suddenly the older man lunged at the would-be killer.

He tackled him to the ground, landing a punch to the man's jaw. "You fucked up." He growled, pinning the man as he tried to get away.

The man started to scream but it only turned to gurgled rasps as Ronnie sunk his teeth into his throat. Andy looked away. Feeling vomit rising in his throat at the sight of blood spilling onto the concrete. The metallic scent filled the night air, causing the singer to gag.

What the fuck... he-he bit him. He had just sustained what should be a fatal shot to the chest and he was still alive.

Ronnie stood up, coming out of the frenzied haze. He was completely covered in a mix of his own blood and the other man's. It dripped from his lips as he looked down at the gory scene. The man was dead, his lifeless body bled out. The vampire looked down at his chest, realizing he was shot. The wound already starting to close.

_Fuck... Andy..._

Ronnie turned around in time to see Andy scramble to his feet. A look of pure terror on his face. He was shaking like a leaf, stepping back when Ronnie tried to reach out to him.

"D-Don't touch me..." he stuttered, not sure if he should run or scream.

Ronnie was covered in blood, his eyes fading from red back to normal. A pair of stark white fangs peeking out from his lips.

"Andy... please... don't scream," Ronnie whispered, stepping closer to the boy.

Andy bolted, almost making it to the street before a pair of hands grabbed him. Ronnie turned him around, pressing him against the brick wall.

"No, no, no... Andy, let me explain... I had to... he was going t-" The older man winced, feeling sharp pain radiating from his palm.

He clutched it, seeing the knife laceration. Andy had cut him. He heard the knife drop to the ground. Along with the rapid clicking of the singer's boots as he sprinted away.

Ronnie stood in the alley threshold, stunned at what had happened.

Andy's lungs burned as he pushed harder. Air becoming harder and harder to get in. He rounded a corner, coming to a stop in an empty parking lot. His stomach lurched as he leaned over a patch of grass, throwing up.

His heart was beating so fast he thought it was going to explode. His whole body felt tingly from the adrenaline. He straightened his back, wiping his lips.nTears welled up in his eyes, his brain completely overwhelmed. His bottom lip quivered as he broke down crying. _Wake up, wake up, wake up_ he begged himself. Shutting his eyes tightly.

When he opened them, he was still standing in the parking lot. The buzzing of the streetlamps, the only sound. He spotted a public restroom sign. He had to get the blood off of him. It would only be a matter of time before he heard sirens. The police had to have been called, right?

Andy frantically scrubbed at his face and chest, the water in the sink running red. He grabbed a wad of paper towels. Trying to remove every drop of blood from his leather jacket and leggings. He was at least a couple of miles from Jake's apartment. There was no way he could make it back.

He was petrified to leave the restroom. What if Ronnie had chased after him? He hadn't even bothered to look behind him. What _was_ Ronnie? The scene kept replaying in the singer's head. He had heard the gun go off and seen the wound through the man's chest. There was no way anyone could survive that. Ronnie hadn't even been phased by it.

Andy felt dizzy, clutching the sides of the sink. The man's neck had been torn out. It looked like Ronnie was _eating_ him. Like some kind of monster.

The singer caught his reflection in the mirror. The two marks on the side of his neck catching his eye. He stared at them, the pieces starting to fall into place.

The blackout curtains. The wounds on his neck. Sleeping all day. Never eating. Being shot in the chest.

_Vampire._

Andy shook his head, no that was impossible. None of that could have possibly been real. The coke. It had to have been laced with something. That was it, he had hallucinated it.

He knew he was lying to himself. The drugs being laced wouldn't explain why he was covered in blood. He needed to get away from here before Ronnie found him. Or the cops showed up. There was no way he could go back to Jake's; Ronnie would find him there.

Andy searched his pocket, breathing a sigh of relief when he felt his phone. He pulled it out, searching through his contacts. He hit the number for Matt, holding the phone up to his ear. He prayed the man would answer.

"Hello?" Matt's voice sounded groggy like he was half asleep.

"Matt! Fuck... I-I need you to come get me. Right now!" Andy begged, trying to keep the panic in his voice to a minimum.

"Andy? What the fuck... dude, it's five in the fucking morning. Where the fuck are you even at?"

"I-I don't know... this shopping center a few blocks from the Whiskey... please. You have to come get me." Fresh tears started to fall down the singer's face.

"What happened? Andy are you okay?" The man's voice changed tones as he started to realize something was wrong.

"I-I'm just really drunk... please come get me."

"Fuck... fine. Text me wherever it is that you're at." Matt groaned.

Andy heard the line click as the call ended. He held his breath. Cracking the door open enough to read the name of the plaza. He texted it to Matt. Seconds felt like hours as he waited. Shaking and trying to pull himself together.

He heard the sound of an engine turning off outside the bathroom door. _Please be Matt._

"Andy?" he heard his friend's voice call.

The singer came busting through the door, almost falling into Matt. The man gave him a strange look. "Dude... you look like you've seen a ghost. What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"I don't know... shit I think I got some laced shit." He lied, pushing past Matt to get in the car.

"Okay..." Matt looked around, wondering how Andy had ended up here. "So, I'm dropping you off at home?"

Matt jumped in the front seat, noticing that Andy was shaking.

"No!" Andy exclaimed, "No... uh, just let me sleep on your couch. Jake uh... he's got his girlfriend over. I-I promised him I'd leave them alone tonight."

"Alright... whatever you say..."

Andy took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Ronnie didn't know where Matt lived. He didn't even know they were friends. He would be safe there. Giving him enough time to figure out his next move.

In the rearview mirror, he could see red and blue flashing lights fading into the distance. 


	9. Popular Monster

**Chapter Eight: Popular Monster**

Ronnie stared at the ceiling. He didn't know how long he'd been laying on his bed, completely motionless. Still in the blood-stained clothing from the night before.

The sight of Andy's horrified face was burned into his brain. Replaying on a loop like some kind of sick torture technique. He had no choice. There had been milliseconds to make his decision. He'd seen the man's finger tense to pull the trigger. Barely managing to shove Andy out of the way before the gun went off.

Ronnie hadn't even felt the pain from being shot. He was so worried about Andy that he went on autopilot. Then it all became a blur. He had never felt rage like that before. It was completely animalistic. An overwhelming urge to rip the man to shreds for threatening Andy's life.

What did that cost him? Andy looked absolutely traumatized. The way he looked at him. Like he was a murderer or some kind of monster. There was no way the boy would ever come back to him. In fact, Andy could be halfway across the country by now. After seeing what he did, Ronnie wouldn't blame him.

The cops had shown up by the time Ronnie fled. He waited for them to find him, connecting the dots to the show. But it hadn't even made the news, no one cared about the death of a homeless man. What a sick society, Ronnie thought to himself.

He pushed his hair back, sitting up. He was going insane, ripping apart from the inside. It was an intense mix of anxiety, despair, and obsession. Swirling around in his mind and making it hard to breathe. Feelings like this were supposed to be past him. It wasn't the result of the man he'd killed. It was not knowing where Andy was. Whether he was safe or not. And if he was in pain.

Ronnie had to find the boy. He had to explain things to him in the hope that Andy would understand. He couldn't even begin to think of what to say. How do you tell the love of your life that you're an undead serial killer who drinks human blood? They don't put that type of advice in relationship books.

He started the shower, stripping the bloodied clothes off. Almost all of Andy's things were here. That meant he would have to come back, right? His laptop, clothes, makeup, car. All of it was here. Ronnie picked his phone up, sending a text to the singer.

'Please call me'.

Andy clutched his chest, the anxiety reaching a fever pitch inside him. He woke up violently hungover after only sleeping a few hours. What little sleep he got was nothing but nightmares. Watching Ronnie get shot. The blood. Running for his life. Every time felt like he was back in the alley.

He shook, holding his knees against his chest. He had never seen a man die before, let alone be shot. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw his face. It made him feel nauseous.

Despite the scene replaying in his head endlessly, it still didn't feel real. How could anyone survive being shot through the chest? Andy knew what he saw, it was a fatal wound. Ronnie didn't even seem to feel it.

The singer tried to tell himself that there was a logical explanation. That it was his memory that was faulty from all the shots. He practically lived with the older man; he would have known if something was wrong with Ronnie.

He'd seen him out during the daytime. Sure, he preferred nights, but he didn't burst into flames. If the wounds on his neck were from Ronnie, wouldn't he have turned? That's how it worked in all the books and movies. But then what explained the inhuman strength? How he ripped the man's neck open like it was nothing.

The thought shook Andy to his core. Had he been lying in bed with an undead serial killer for weeks? It threatened reality as he knew it. Did that mean there were others like Ronnie out there? The panic started to rise in his chest again. What was he supposed to do?

The singer's phone buzzed causing him to jump. He picked it up with trembling hands, his heart sinking as the text flashed across the screen. 'Please call me' – Ronnie

Andy bit his lip, his fingers hovering over the keyboard. Torn between wanting to see him and find out the truth and getting as far away as his car would take him.

"Fuck... my fucking car." He cursed under his breath, realizing that it was at the older man's house. Along with most of his belongings.

Andy ran his hands down his face, trying to put together a plan. He could insist Ronnie meet him somewhere public. Bring his stuff and then go their separate ways, never to speak of what happened. Ronnie wouldn't try to hurt him, would he? He had defended him. If it wasn't for him then Andy didn't know if he'd still be alive.

Still, it wasn't like things could go back to normal. Andy knew too much. Whatever was going on, whatever Ronnie was. He had kept it a secret from the singer.

No, it was best if he never saw the man again. He knew that was the smartest choice. Life was complicated enough living on the road most of the year. This was more than he could handle.

The thought of never seeing Ronnie again ate at him. His heart at war with his brain. Andy had never been more scared for his life before. What he saw shocked and horrified him. But he still wanted to be in the man's arms. He still loved him. It didn't go away overnight.

He hit call.

"Andy?! Fuck... you actually called..." Ronnie's voice sounded panicked and exhausted. A far cry from the monster he'd seen the night before.

"... yeah." Andy choked out, his heart pounding.

"..." The line was silent for a minute and Andy thought about hanging up. But then he heard the older man sigh, "Andy... I was so worried about you. I tried to find you last night..."

"You were worried about me? Ronnie what the fuck." Andy kept his voice low, worried that Matt might overhear him.

"It's been taken care of. No one is going to come after you." He stated, dodging the obvious. "Babe... just come over and we can talk... okay?"

"I don't want to talk. Put my stuff in my car. Leave the keys on the dash." It pained the younger man to speak the words.

His heart felt like it was shattering into pieces. It was stupid, they had only been together for a matter of weeks. Nowhere near long enough to justify the difficulty he was having severing ties.

"Please let me try to explain... y-you can ask any questions you want. Just... Andy please..."

Andy lowered the phone from his face, trying to hold it together. He was struggling to get air in, tears threatening to fall. He hated how weak he felt, like a fucking child running scared.

"You heard what I said. I don't want any part in whatever it is you have to explain. Just do what I told you to."

The phone clicked as Andy ended the call.

Ronnie paced around his apartment, his mind racing through different scenarios. All he needed to do was explain things to Andy. It would sound crazy at first, but he had saved the boy's life. He didn't have another option. That man would have shot Andy had he not intervened.

The poor boy was no doubt traumatized, as anyone would be. Ronnie knew what it was like. He had been through the same thing out in that desert years ago. Watching someone be killed right in front of him. The memories of that night haunted him for years. Knowing Andy was going through that only made him feel worse.

Andy had to see that he would never hurt him. The bond wouldn't go away because now he knew. How could it be so easy for him to leave? No goodbyes, no explanations, nothing. To Ronnie, it felt like the world was ending.

The older man pulled the curtain back enough to see the parking lot where Andy's car was. He had been waiting for hours, not knowing when the boy would show up. Andy hadn't given a time, but the sun was starting to set.

Ronnie's ears perked up at the sound of a car coming around the curve. It parked out of view of the window, almost as if on purpose. In the waning light, he could see Andy walking across the parking lot. The sound of tires peeling out onto the main road told him Andy was alone now.

The keys jingled between the vampire's fingers.

Andy cursed under his breath, bending down and searching the floorboards. His car was unlocked but the keys were nowhere in sight. He glanced over his shoulder, his heart going crazy. He needed to get out of here.

It hadn't been his best idea to send Matt away as fast as he did. But he was worried about his safety. If Ronnie wanted to kill him, he would have done so the previous night. Andy paused, standing up and looking towards the man's apartment. The windows were completely blacked out, and for a second he wondered if Ronnie was even home.

He said he wanted to talk. The singer bit his lip, heavily debating giving in. Could he really go his whole life without knowing the truth? Had he not been falling apart all day from the thought of never seeing Ronnie again? It was suicide. Even entertaining the thought of being alone with him.

Andy looked down at his hand, twisting the silver ring around his finger. He didn't even know if it would work, there was a lot he didn't know. It wasn't even his, he'd borrowed it from Matt. Told him it was for a photoshoot. Not the truth; that it was a desperate attempt to have some type of defense. Even if it turned out to be a silly myth.

_Keys. Need to find them._

"Looking for these?" Andy's heart dropped in his chest.

He could sense the man behind him. Inches away, a pair of keys dangling by his ear. Andy spun around, coming face to face with the older man.

"Give me my keys," Andy stated, trying to hide the fear in his voice.

"Let's talk first," Ronnie replied, slipping the keys into his back pocket.

"What is there to talk about? How you murdered someone in front of me last night? Or how you got shot in the chest and didn't die?" Andy glared, crossing his arms across his chest.

The older man sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I'm sure you have a lot of questions. And I promise to answer all of them. But not out here."

Andy raised an eyebrow, doing his best to act like he wasn't scared to death. "Do you think I'm stupid? So, you can kill me or lock me up? Or I don't know... whatever it is you have planned."

Ronnie looked at the singer in disbelief. He could hear the boy's heart racing and smell the fear on him. Andy was scared of him, and why shouldn't he be? From his perspective, Ronnie was a monster. All those nights he held him while he slept rendered meaningless. Couldn't Andy see he was the same person? Nothing had changed, the only difference was that Andy had seen the side of him he hid.

"I was only trying to save you... I would never hurt you." Ronnie raised his hand up, cupping the side of Andy's face.

The singer reacted before he realized what he was doing. Grabbing the man's wrist and jerking it away.

Ronnie let out an agonizing scream, breaking free of the boy's hold. He doubled over in pain, cradling his wrist against his chest. His whole arm felt like it was on fire, the flesh around his wrist burning. Blistering up from only a second of contact with the silver ring.

"Fuck- ah" he cursed, the pain still radiating up his arm.

"Oh my god... fuck... I-I didn't mean to..." Andy stammered, reaching out for the man to try and help him.

"No! Don't touch me!" Ronnie boomed, jumping back from the singer. "Take it off. Take the silver off."

Andy stared at the man in front of him. The reality of what he was undeniable. He was frozen, petrified to move. He could grab the keys; he had his weapon. He could run and never look back. 

The younger man twisted the ring off his finger, setting it onto the center console of his car. "I'll give you twenty minutes... that's it."

Andy took a deep breath, ignoring the voice in his head screaming that he was an idiot. He wanted his closure. 


	10. Searching For A Way Out

**Chapter Nine: Searching For A Way Out**

Andy chipped at the paint on his nails. Trying to keep his breathing even and calm as he sat across the couch from the older man. He wondered if Ronnie could hear his heart pounding in his chest. He said he could ask him anything. The singer had a lot he wanted to ask, but it sounded so preposterous that he didn't know how to phrase them.

"I'm not going to hurt you... I'm not evil..." Ronnie spoke, breaking the silence between them.

He was sitting on the edge of a black leather chair, leaning forward with his fingers laced together. The man looked so normal, that's what scared Andy the most. Looking back on things there were signs, but how would anyone guess the truth? It was the stuff of legends and myths.

"... I don't know what to believe anymore..." Andy replied, keeping a watchful eye on the older man.

"I haven't lied to you. You never asked.

Andy's eyes widened at the bold statement. It was one hell of an excuse. "Never asked? Don't you think that's something you should have brought up? How the fuck would I have even thought to ask?"

Ronnie shrugged his shoulders, "I still didn't lie to you." He was playing it cool, but inside he was going through hell.

He could tell Andy was afraid of him and that ate at him. How was he supposed to prove to the boy that he could be trusted? If saving his life wouldn't do it, what would?

"What was I supposed to do, Andy? You wouldn't have believed me if I told you. For the record I was planning to tell you... but the time had to be right..."

"So... you're... a vampire..." Andy felt stupid even saying the words. It was completely against what he thought the world to be. A rational place where things could be explained through natural phenomena.

The supernatural didn't fit into that framework. The singer kept it a secret, but he spent his entire childhood petrified of the supernatural. Ghosts, monsters, demons. As a child, he would have nightmares, constantly afraid that they secretly existed. And not only did they exist, but they were out to get him. He spent years trying to overcome that fear. Convincing himself that it was only a product of his imagination. Not a real threat, just a silly childhood fear.

That illusion he thought was reality had been shattered. There was no putting the veil back up.

"You can call it that, I guess." Ronnie's voice was still oddly soothing to the younger man. Despite the events of the past twenty-four hours, there was still a part of him that was comforted by the man's presence.

"Were you born that way? Or... did you end up like this?" Andy asked, chewing on the inside of his lip.

"No... I've only been like this for a year. It happened in prison during a fight. There were others there... and one of them turned me."

"Turned you how..." Andy followed up.

"It's complicated. During the fight, he attacked me, and well, he killed me. But I cut him and some of his blood got in my mouth, so when I died... I came back. Like this." Ronnie fully realized how ridiculous it all sounded.

His reaction had been about the same when he found out what happened. He never believed the rumors, figuring it was a prison myth. The men got bored and what better way to entertain themselves than making up some fantastical story. Of course, it wasn't a myth. He only wished he had listened to the other inmates.

"You died?" Andy laughed, shaking his head. "You can't be dead. You're sitting here talking to me."

"You saw me get shot in the heart last night, didn't you? The whole immortal thing, why do you think that is? It's because I'm already dead." He didn't understand how that was the part Andy was hung up on. But it was easy enough to prove.

Ronnie stood up, walking over to where Andy was sitting. The singer jumped, backing up against the couch. His nails digging into the cushions.

"Andy..." Ronnie frowned. "I have no intention of hurting you... please don't be afraid of me..."

He held his hand out, waiting for the singer to take it. Andy let out a shaky breath, slowly extending his hand. Ronnie cupped it gently, placing it on the center of his chest.

Andy stayed quiet, trying to feel the beating of the man's heart. Moving his hand to the side, shocked by the utter stillness. There was nothing. All the nights he laid in his arms, how had he not noticed? How could he be in love with someone who was dead?

"... that's impossible." Andy blinked, his hand shaking.

"I know it's a lot to take in..." Ronnie stood up, taking a seat next to the boy. "But Andy... it doesn't change how I feel about you."

The singer bit his lip, not sure if he should believe the older man. Even if Ronnie had never lied to him about it, he still felt betrayed. What were Ronnie's intentions that night at the bar? Had it been a mutual hookup, or did he have other plans the whole time?

"At the bar that night... on my birthday... why did you take my back to your car?" Andy asked, watching for any sign of hesitation.

"I think we both had the same motive that night..." Ronnie answered, leaving out the fact that originally, he had intended on draining the boy.

"You didn't have any other reasons?" Andy raised an eyebrow.

"If you're asking did I intend on killing you, the answer is no..."

Andy rubbed the side of his neck, remembering the strange marks and bruises he'd woken up with the next morning. He passed them off as hickeys but in light of everything he'd just heard, suspicion was creeping in.

"Did you bite me?"

The older man looked down at his hands. Should he tell the truth or lie? If he told Andy what really happened, he would without a doubt be upset. Worse, it wasn't the only time. But he had promised to be open and honest with the boy.

"I did..."

Andy's heart dropped in his chest, a cold chill coming over him. He felt sick to his stomach. The thought that Ronnie could have fed on him without him even realizing it shook him to his core. He tried to wrack his brain for the memory, but it was hazy. Only remembering bits and pieces of being with him.

"So, you fed on me? Without me knowing..." The shock gave way to rage and a feeling of violation. "How can you claim you won't hurt me if you already have?"

"Andy, I didn't hurt you... I can feed on someone without harming them..." Ronnie grabbed the singer's hands, hoping to say something that would calm Andy down.

"But you had no right... what if you had killed me? What, does that mean I would have woken up like you... a monster?" Andy regretted the word the second it left his lips.

Ronnie's face fell, pulling his hands back. The word stung coming from Andy. Was that all Andy saw him as now? A murderous monster ruled by his lust for human blood. Couldn't he see that wasn't true? He didn't care if the rest of the world thought he was a monster, as long as Andy saw his heart. The rest didn't matter. Losing that was a devasting blow.

"Ronnie... fuck, I- I don't mean it like that..." The younger man apologized. His facial expressions softening.

"It's okay... maybe that's what I am. But I want you to know I would never turn anyone unless they wanted me to... I wouldn't do that to someone else."

Andy went silent, not sure what else to say. Where did they go from here? A part of him wished he could go back in time and ignore that man yelling at him in the alley. Living longer in his blissful ignorance. Under all his anger and fear, he still loved Ronnie. The thought of this being the end was too painful to consider, but what was the alternative?

"I do love Andy... so much... and I don't want to lose you." Ronnie sighed, breaking the awkward silence that had grown between them.

"It's so much to take in... I mean how would it even work? You're immortal... and I'm not. I would get old and die... and you wouldn't." Andy frowned, a flood of emotions coming with the realization.

"Unless you became like me... yes." Ronnie bit his bottom lip, debating if he should tell Andy about the bond.

"But I don't think I want to be like that... having to kill people... drink their blood..." Andy shook his head; eternity is a long time. What if things didn't work out, would he spend the rest of forever alone?

"So, what does that mean, for us?" Ronnie watched Andy's face for a hint of what he might say. He looked lost in thought, torn between two options.

Andy had to feel the bond too. It was mutual, but maybe the pull wasn't as strong for him. The older man would move heaven and earth for the boy. But here he was with his heart in Andy's hands, waiting for him to break it.

"I don't know... I still haven't even processed last night..." The younger man inhaled sharply, trying to stop himself from getting overly emotional.

"I need time to think..." Andy looked away, not wanting to see the dismay in the man's eyes.

"I understand..." Ronnie reached into his back pocket, pulling the boy's keys out. Handing them to Andy.

The singer clutched them in his fist, trying to gather the strength to get up and leave. His heart felt empty as he stood up; anxiety rising in his chest.

The cold winter air hit him as he stepped outside, the sun had set. The skies now pitch black. Andy wrapped his arms around himself, hurrying to his car. His hands shook as he started the engine, tears pricking at his eyes.

He knew what was best for him. That was ripping the Band-Aid off, letting it hurt like hell but moving on. Doing the best he could to forget about the past twenty-four hours, like it was nothing more than a bad dream. His breathing became shaky as he pulled out of the parking spot and onto the main road. Finally giving up on fighting the tidal wave of emotions, crying softly as the man's place faded into the distance.

Was he making a mistake? 


	11. When We Both Felt Sane

****Chapter Ten: When We Both Felt Sane** **

_February 27, 2011_

Andy couldn’t focus on anything being said to him. One of his managers was talking, going over plans for the upcoming tour. The rest of the band sitting around the table in the large conference room. It was as if he was watching his life through a screen, detached from reality.

The band was starting another headlining tour in less than three weeks. Normally, the prospects of tour would have his spirits high. Back where he belonged, on stage. But the singer hadn’t felt a positive emotion since _that_ night.

He was exhausted, his dreams plagued with nightmares of watching the man die. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself that all that was over, it didn’t work. He still woke up nightly in a cold sweat, his heart pounding in his chest. Over the past few nights, his dreams had taken on an even more morbid theme. His own death.

Only, he didn’t stay dead.

His waking hours weren’t much of a relief. The anxiety he’d worked so hard to control since he was a kid was back with a vengeance. He’d find himself shaking for no reason, having panic attacks almost daily. Drinking more, just to quiet his mind.

Then there was the empty feeling in his chest. A void that had consumed him, dragging him into darkness. His confident and cocky bravado felt like a chore to keep up when all he wanted to do was hide himself away. It wasn’t the usual breakup, moping around for a few days. Bouncing back with maybe a little rebound sex. It was like a piece of his soul was missing. A critical piece that he couldn’t replace with booze, drugs, or sex.

Andy wondered if _he_ felt the same, or had Ronnie already moved on? He’d had no contact with the older man since he walked out of his apartment. No way of knowing how he was fairing or if he even cared anymore. That not knowing ate at him, chipping away at his sanity.

He had panicked in the moment, relying on the cliché ‘I need time to think’ line. When in reality, he knew there was no thinking to be done. Ronnie and he were from different worlds, two worlds that should have never met. Incompatible.

The older man had done his part, giving him the space he’d requested. Which is why Andy felt like a piece of shit when he sent the last text to him. ‘ _I can’t’_ was all it said. The reply still in his texts; _Understood, I’m sorry_.

“Hello? Are you listening?” The man sitting across from him said, waving his hands in front of the singer’s face.

The guy worked for their record label; he was the one organizing the tour. He did not seem pleased with the front man’s lack of attention.

“Yeah… sorry, this shit is boring. Do we even need to be here?” Andy replied with annoyance in his tone.

They didn’t need his input on half the shit they were talking about. Most of it would be decided for them, that was what they were paid to do.

“I’m sorry, are there more important things than your career you need to attend to?” the man shot back.

Andy rolled his eyes, grumbling insults under his breath. The man carried on with details on the tour dates, side-eyeing the singer. Andy could care less; he was counting down the minutes until he was free. Wanting nothing more than to find the nearest bar and blackout.

Ronnie sunk his fangs into the woman’s neck, her body going limp in his arms as he fed. He closed his eyes, focusing on the sweet taste of fresh blood. She was young, early twenties at the oldest. A college student who’d picked the wrong bar and the wrong man to talk to.

Her knees weakened, buckling in and forcing the vampire to support her. A few more seconds and she would be dead. Pretty blonde sorority girl never returns from a night out with friends? That would spark an investigation. Better to leave her alive and save himself the trouble.

Ronnie retracted his fangs, pulling back just in time for her to lose consciousness. He wiped the blood from his lips, propping her up against the bathroom wall. If anyone found her, it would look like she’d simply had too much to drink. Dazed and confused but otherwise fine.

Ronnie slipped out of the bathroom, disappearing among the crowd of people. The high of feeding was starting to wear off as he reached the bar, ordering another shot.

Andy’s ‘time to think’ had turned into almost a week of not hearing from him. Then a single text message sealing their fate. It was what the older man had expected, he wasn’t an idiot. He knew what ‘time to think’ meant, it was an easy way of letting someone down. He’d played it cool, not wanting to inflict any more pain on the boy.

The three people he’d killed that night hadn’t been so lucky. Ronnie had been on a rampage ever since. Trying to kill his emotions with violence, sex, and alcohol. Whatever was left of his humanity he wanted dead.

His hopes of diminishing the pain he felt didn’t last long. The longer he went without seeing Andy the worst he got. The uneasy feeling in his chest had turned into a full-on obsession. If what they said about bonds was true, then they were fated to be together. Against all odds, they had found one another. Did Andy not feel it as strong? Or was the whole thing another cursed part of his existence. Fall in love with a human, the only one you’ll ever love. Just to have them break your heart.

It didn’t help that Andy’s name was the one on everyone’s lips. His band the next ‘big thing’ in the scene. Torture.

Ronnie ordered another drink, taking a seat at the bar. It took a lot more to get him drunk nowadays. The whole inhumane healing seemed to work for being drunk too.

He sipped on the glass of whiskey; Seagram’s 7. It was Andy who had turned him onto the brand, and it made him think of the boy.

His stomach felt sick, knotting itself. It was a sensation he hadn’t felt since turning. And certainly not from alcohol. At first, he tried to ignore it, but it only got worse. Ronnie’s chest felt tight like he couldn’t breathe. It felt so real, yet distant at the same time. As if he wasn’t experiencing it from within his own body.

He motioned for the woman behind the bar to bring him the check. Not wanting to spend another second in the bar all of a sudden.

“That all for you, babe?” The bartender chirped, handing the man his tab.

Ronnie forced a smile, signing his name on the receipt and leaving the woman a generous tip. Fixing his leather jacket before making his way out into the cool night air. The strange feeling in his chest still present.

Andy’s hands shook, his lungs burning from a lack of oxygen. His breath, shaky and uneven as he leaned over the sink. Knuckles turning white from the death grip he had on the porcelain sides. He felt like he was going to throw up, the alcohol not sitting well.

The singer closed his eyes, trying to focus on taking deep breaths. It had hit him out of nowhere. One moment he was taking shots with the guys, comfortably numb. The next, an overwhelming feeling of dread had descended upon him. Feeling like he couldn’t breathe, he’d made an excuse to slip away. He didn’t even remember what he said.

Andy clutched at his chest, trying to keep his gasps for breath quiet. If anyone came in and found him like this he would be mortified. It was getting harder to hide; he’d almost had a full-on panic attack during the meeting with management. Was it PTSD? Lack of sleep? Stress? They were getting more frequent. Each time worse than the last and striking him randomly.

“Fuck, calm down…” he whispered to himself, his heart beating wildly.

Andy could feel the shots he’d taken threatening to come back up. He leaned over the sink, the feeling in his throat causing him to cough. Trying to fight the nauseous feeling.

It was no use, the alcohol burning his throat as he got sick.

Ronnie glanced over at the four men at the bar. Long black hair, leather jackets with the band’s logo on them. Clicking their glasses together as they took a round of shots, one member notably missing.

His luck would dictate him ending up at the same bar as Andy’s band. There was a chance the singer wasn’t there, or maybe he’d left early. But something told him that wasn’t the case either.

He had wandered into the bar at random, having spent the better part of the last hour walking the streets of Hollywood. No sense of direction, just walking until he ended up at the front door of the bar. The unease lingering in his stomach and chest without a clear reason or cause.

“Where did Andy go?” Ronnie overheard one of the men ask.

“I don’t know, said something about having to take a piss. Who knows man, probably blacked out in one of the stalls?” Jake laughed, shrugging his shoulders.

He should leave. If Andy saw him, he would freak out. Showing up at the same bar as him by accident, fat chance the singer would believe that. Ronnie didn’t need to give him any more reasons to think he was a psychopathic murderer.

Ronnie rounded the corner, figuring he would sneak out the back exit to avoid the group of men spotting him. Who knows what Andy had told them. He was almost to the door when he heard the faint sound of a pounding heart and gasps for air coming from the men’s bathroom.

The older man approached the door, pausing with his hand on the knob. The feeling in his chest was reaching a fever pitch as he pushed it open.

Andy was bent over the sink, his face hidden by a veil of black hair. His thin frame shook as he threw up. Ronnie winced at the sound, not sure if should try and help him. He heard the boy curse under his breath trying to calm himself. Leaning down and rinsing his mouth out with water, oblivious to his presence.

Andy pushed his hair back, trying to keep it together as his eyes started to tear up. He would give anything to be back home, instead of in some random public bathroom having a mental breakdown. He coughed as air became harder to get in. The feeling wasn’t going away.

He felt a hand cup around his shoulder. It was gentle and loving, grounding him back in reality. The singer drew a deep breath in, the tight feeling vanishing as he started to come to his senses. He felt his heartbeat slow down to normal, the sick feeling in his gut subsiding. Andy closed his eyes, focusing on his breath. A calming feeling coming over him.

“… I’m okay, I just drank too-” Andy turned around, expecting to see one of his bandmates standing behind him. His heart-stopping as he locked eyes with the older man. His tattooed fingers still wrapped around his shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Ronnie asked, his voice soft.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Andy growled, pulling away from the man’s touch. Had Ronnie followed him to the bar?

“I was bar hopping and I ended up here… I had no idea you were here.” The older man sighed; he could tell Andy didn’t believe him.

“Sure… well you should probably leave then.” The singer’s tone was cold, his words more of an order than a suggestion.

“I was about to… you never answered my question, though. Are you okay?” Ronnie asked again, raising an eyebrow.

Andy’s face was pale, his red lipstick slightly smeared. He looked like he’d lost weight since the last time he saw him. The boy leaned against the stall beside him, crossing his arms. He looked shaken up and exhausted. Ronnie wondered if he’d been sleeping at all.

“I’m fine. I took some shots too fast and felt sick. It’s no big deal.” Andy lied.

Was that what he had been sensing the whole time? The strange feeling in his chest, was that from Andy? He was starting to think ending up at the bar was anything but a coincidence. It was like he knew the younger man was in pain.

“I’m sorry Andy… if I’ve caused you any harm.” Ronnie didn’t know what else to say, if it weren’t from him Andy wouldn’t have been traumatized that night. He wouldn’t be having a panic attack in the bathroom of some sleazy bar.

“I don’t need your pity; I don’t need anything from you.” Andy shot back, his emotions causing his anxiety to spike back up.

He struggled to maintain his composure, not wanting to appear weak in front of the older man. The last thing he wanted was for Ronnie to think he was some heartbroken kid who couldn’t get over a fling.

Andy swallowed hard, his stomach still in knots. He needed to get away from the man, but it was like his feet were frozen in place. His breathing becoming shallow again, threatening to send him into another tailspin.

“I can help you…” Ronnie softened his tone, every fiber of his being telling him to wrap his arms around the boy. Take away his fear and anxiety.

“F-Fuck off…” Andy choked out, trying to step around him to the door.

“I used to get them too…” Ronnie paused as Andy’s hand pulled back from the doorknob. “Panic attacks… when I first got to prison… I can help you stop it.”

Andy broke, no longer able to keep the façade up. “I feel like I c-can’t breathe…”

Ronnie held his hand out, offering it to the singer. Taking a chance and stepping closer to him.

Andy took it, his brain screaming at him that he was making a mistake. The older man pulled him in, the scent of his cologne was calming. He rested his head against Ronnie’s shoulder, the muscles in his back relaxing.

“Your safe Andy…” Ronnie whispered, running his fingertips up and down the boy’s back in soothing circles.

Andy should be petrified, his neck inches away from the man’s lips. The man he had watched rip someone apart right in front of him. The bodies that kept showing up, mutilated, and mangled on the news. He knew it was Ronnie’s doing. Nothing about his presence should be calming, yet it was.


	12. Coming Home

**Chapter Eleven: Coming Home**

Andy took a drag from his cigarette, glancing over at the man sitting on the step beside him. The bar was closing, but he wasn't ready to go home. Worried that if he did, he might have another panic attack.

"Do those happen a lot?" Ronnie asked, breaking the silence between them.

"They used to when I was a kid." Andy pushed his hair back, biting at his lip. "But then they started again... you know, after everything... it's normally not this bad."

Ronnie frowned; he knew it was because of him. It was his fault the singer's world had been turned upside down. If he never approached the boy that night, would Andy be happier? It made the older man feel like a monster.

"I really am sorry... I didn't mean to bring all of this shit into your life." He put his cigarette out, looking up to the night sky.

"It's not all your fault, I willingly walked into it. I didn't ask questions when maybe I should have..." Andy replied.

Ronnie nodded, glancing back at the singer. Andy looked like he was about to fall asleep, fighting to keep his eyes open. How many nights had he been kept up by nightmares? That had happened to him after the night in the desert. At least for Ronnie, it was the result of human violence.

"Do you want me to take you home? I forgot that not everyone is nocturnal..." He joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"I don't know..." Andy laid his head on the other man's shoulder, letting his eyes close.

Ronnie draped his arm around the boy, debating if he should offer to take him to his place. They weren't together anymore, so maybe he shouldn't. He could sleep on the couch and let Andy have his bed. That way if anything happened, he'd be there. Ronnie knew he'd sleep better with Andy there, knowing he was safe.

"Well, I don't think they're going to let you sleep on the steps... if you don't want to go home... you're welcome to stay with me..."

Andy's eyes opened as he thought the offer over. He shouldn't. He needed to stay strong in his decision for his own good. But the younger man was at the end of his rope, he couldn't take another sleepless night.

"You can have the bedroom to yourself, I can sleep on the couch. I don't mind..." The older man added.

"Okay... just for tonight." Andy didn't want to risk giving up the only peace he'd felt in two weeks. Even if it led to more destruction later.

Ronnie kissed the top of Andy's head, the boy fast asleep in his arms. His chest rising and falling in a slow steady rhythm. He had made good on his promise, letting Andy have the master bedroom to himself. Taking the couch and sipping on a glass of wine as he contemplated the night. Where were he and Andy at when the sun rose? He didn't know the answer.

It was around five in the morning when the door to the bedroom opened, Andy standing in the doorway. He hadn't said anything, he didn't need to. The lonely look in his crystal blue eyes was all Ronnie needed.

Andy had curled up in his arms, passing out within minutes. The world felt right again, the aching in the older man's chest was gone. Andy could change his mind tomorrow, come to his senses again, and leave again. So, he better enjoy the moment while he still had it.

It had to mean something that the younger man trusted him enough to invite him into bed. That he was able to fall asleep in his arms without fear of being harmed. It made Ronnie feel like a person again, instead of some nightmarish monster.

The older man didn't sleep, staying awake to watch over the singer. Stroking his hair gently as he slept. Cherishing the fact that the constant worry and emptiness were, for the moment, gone.

"Mm..." Andy mumbled, his eyes fluttering open.

At first, he didn't realize where he was, feeling like the past two weeks had been a dream. His brain started to process the night, the multiple shots blurring the details a bit. Ronnie had found him at the bar, on the verge of a breakdown. Ronnie's touch bringing him out of the tailspin. Sitting outside smoking together before ending up in the man's bed.

"Good morning..." The older man spoke, meeting the singer's gaze.

"Is it really morning?" Andy groaned, burying his face in the man's shoulder.

"More like afternoon, but you get the point." Ronnie chuckled, "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah... actually I did," Andy replied, letting himself enjoy waking up in someone's arms.

That was one of the hardest parts. Waking up alone and going to bed alone, no one there for him. Even if it had only been a couple of months, he'd grown accustomed to the man's presence. When he was gone, it left a gaping hole in the younger man's life.

"I'm glad... you passed out so fast, you must have been exhausted."

"I was... I haven't been able to sleep much..." Andy felt a shiver go down his spine as the older man's hands slipped down to his waist. His fingertips running up and down his back.

"I'm glad I was a good pillow for you then."

Ronnie's hands rested on the singer's hip bones, his thumbs lightly stroking the skin over top of them. It was starting to turn him on a little too much, biting his bottom lip to keep silent. He'd had one or two guys spend the night since they broke up. Neither of them were even halfway decent, caring more about their own pleasure than his. The whole time, wishing they were Ronnie. It left the younger man feeling deprived.

"Fuck..." Andy whispered under his breath as Ronnie dug his nails into his hips just enough to tease him.

"Mm? What was that?" The older man smirked, not being able to resist the temptation in his arms.

"You know exactly what you're doing..." Andy warned playfully, rolling his hips into the man's touch.

"It's not my fault you're so sensitive" Ronnie purred, pulling the boy in closer.

"I'm still mad at you." The younger man warned, despite his body giving a much different message.

"You can't be too mad... you were the one who invited me to bed..." Ronnie mentioned, grinning. 

"Well, I _shouldn't_ have... I shouldn't have even come home with you..." Andy admitted, his hands resting on either side of the man's face, "You're nothing but trouble... but it's like I'm drawn to you..."

"Mm... that feeling is mutual, love." Was it time to tell Andy about the bond? He didn't want to risk scaring him off again, perhaps he should wait a while longer.

Ronnie rolled onto his back, pulling the singer on top of him so that he was straddling his hips. Andy looked breathtakingly beautiful, his long black hair falling down around his face. He'd never wanted someone so much before, the novelty of his beauty never wearing off.

Andy raised an eyebrow, feeling the man's erection through the fabric of his clothes.

"You should ride me," Ronnie smirked, gripping the sides of the boy's thighs.

"Should I? I don't know..." Andy teased, grinding his hips against the older man's.

"Don't pretend like you don't want to..." Ronnie purred, lacing his fingers in the singer's hair and pulling him into a kiss.

"Fuck..." Andy gasped as he felt the man enter him, Ronnie's hands squeezing his hips as he guided him.

"God, you look perfect..." Ronnie whispered, leaning his head back and moaning at how good the singer felt.

Slowly started to move his hips as he let Andy get used to him. All the little gasps and moans the boy made drove him insane. Having to close his eyes to keep from coming too soon, pressing all the way into to him.

"I want to watch you get yourself off..." Ronnie moaned, brushing the boy's hair back out of his face.

Andy smirked at the dirty talk, more than willing to give the man the show he wanted. Shifting his hips before starting to rock them back and forth. He kept his eyes locked on Ronnie's, watching him struggle to bite back moans.

"Oh god... fuck..." Andy gasped as he felt the man's cock brush up against his prostate, sending waves of pleasure through him.

Andy's cheeks were flushed a light pink, his heart beating faster as he started to stroke himself. Ronnie watched lustfully; his fangs barely hidden behind his lips. The temptation to sink his fangs into the boy's neck was overwhelming, but he had to hold back.

The older man pressed his thumbs into the boy's hips, quickening his thrusts. He could feel the singer starting to come, his muscles tensing around him. "Goddamn, you feel so good..." Ronnie moaned.

"F-Fuck... I'm gonna come" Andy gasped, the pleasure starting to overtake him. His eyes slipping shut as he reached his climax, coming over his hand.

Watching the singer come was enough to send Ronnie over the edge. Digging his nails into the boy's hips hard enough to leave bruises as he came deep inside him. Thrusting into Andy hard and deep as he rode out his orgasm.

Andy leaned forward, his hands on either side of Ronnie's shoulders. The older man reached up, pulling the boy into a passionate kiss. Wrapping his arms around Andy's bare shoulders and holding him close enough to feel the beating of his heart.

Andy closed his eyes, still riding the wave of endorphins. He wanted to trust Ronnie not to hurt him. Being apart from him had been hell on earth, but all that had dissipated now that he was back in the man's arms. He didn't want to leave.

"You know... I am still kind of mad at you for not telling me..."

"I know... I should have, Andy. I'm sorry I didn't." Ronnie replied, kissing the top of the younger man's head.

"If... this were to continue... there would have to be rules." Andy said, glancing up at the man.

"Of course... how about we talk it through over dinner tonight?" Ronnie suggested, smiling softly.

"Okay... yeah, that sounds good... it's a date." Andy couldn't help but smile back, his heart feeling full for the first time in two weeks. 


	13. Terms and Conditions

****Chapter Twelve: Terms and Conditions** **

Ronnie took a sip of red wine, letting it wash away the taste of the steak he was forcing himself to eat. Trying to keep up the appearance of normalcy, even though there was no point to it anymore. That ship had long since sailed. Still, he wanted to enjoy dinner with the singer, even if he had to suffer through eating cooked flesh.

As long as Andy was happy, that’s all that mattered. Ronnie couldn’t take his eyes off the boy, grateful for every second he had with him. After all the weeks of soul-crushing numbness and anxiety, he felt sane again.

“Does it even taste good to you?” Andy asked, raising an eyebrow at the older man’s half-eaten steak.

“It’s… better than most things. Not rare enough for my liking though, but not the worst.” Ronnie chuckled, setting his silverware down.

Andy looked around the dimly lit restaurant. It was the nicest place he’d been to since moving to LA, not exactly the most wallet-friendly establishment for a starving artist. Ronnie had chosen it, saying something about it having more privacy to talk. It was obvious that the man was trying to win him back. Prove to him that he wasn’t the bloodthirsty monster from the alleyway, that he was worthy of a second chance.

“So, these rules…” Ronnie broke the awkward silence that had grown between them. “You mentioned this morning that you had some terms and conditions for me?”

Andy looked down at his lap, fidgeting with his thumbs. He had been going back and forth all day in his mind, trying to convince himself to either stay with the man or leave. Being apart from Ronnie had been hell, and this was the first time in weeks he’d been able to go a day without a panic attack. At the same time, the reality of the situation was that they would be fated for disaster.

“I know you’re going on tour soon… and I would like to figure things out between us before you leave…” Ronnie added, hoping it would prompt the younger man to speak.

Andy cleared his throat, his blue eyes meeting the older man’s. “Yeah… I think we should. You know I miss the way things were… before I knew.”

Ronnie frowned. He would give anything to go back to that night and change the course of events. Let Andy have back the blissful ignorance that made him feel safe for just a while longer.

“Nothing has changed about the way I feel for you. Nothing has to change… the only difference is now you know…” He answered, knowing that it wasn’t as simple as he was trying to make it out to be.

Andy nodded. “If we were to be together… I don’t want to be involved in _that_ part. What happened that night, can’t happen again…”?

“It won’t. Not unless you were in danger.” Ronnie spoke softly.

“No… not even then. Ronnie, I don’t want you to have to be my rescuer or something. I don’t want anyone fighting battles for me, especially not killing anyone…” Andy sighed, his stomach tightening at the look of apprehension on the man’s face.

“Andy, if you were in danger I couldn’t just stand there and do nothing. Even if I was human…” Ronnie bit his lip, hoping he wasn’t digging himself a hole.

“I’m not saying you can’t jump in and help me kick some motherfucker’s ass if they deserve it… but killing people?” Andy shook his head, flashing from that night making him feel sick. “I don’t want to be part of that.”

Ronnie went silent, nodding in understanding. The truth was he would do anything for the boy, even if that meant breaking his rules to keep him safe. There was nothing more important to him. Andy wasn’t budging on his conditions, so the best he could do was hope things never got to that point again.

“Okay, I promise…” The older man reluctantly agreed.

“I know that you have to eat… but I don’t want to hear about it, see it… and my friends, people I know… they’re off-limits.” The singer continued, doing his best to appear calm and collected.

Ronnie could hear his heart pounding. It saddened him that the younger man was still afraid of him. That’s what all the rules were about, Andy wanted to pretend like things were normal. It was denial, but he didn’t blame him.

“Of course, I would never hurt your friends…”

“And no feeding from me again, not without my permission…” Andy crossed his arms, waiting for Ronnie to push back on his requests. But he just kept nodding in agreement, seemingly sincere.

Andy sighed, his shoulders relaxing now that he had laid his cards on the table. He still didn’t know where it left them. While he had his reassurance, he wasn’t blind to the fact that several questions were left unanswered. The painfully obvious one being how the hell a vampire and a human could ever be together forever. Forever for him was finite, but for Ronnie time was meaningless.

The thought of his own mortality was something Andy tried to avoid thinking about. Though he seemed to challenge death every time he was on stage or raging after a show, he feared it. The uncertainty of life and when it might end haunted him. Ronnie was something that forced him to consider it. Death would separate them forever. Although Andy didn’t believe in an afterlife, his heart ached at the realization that they would be ripped apart from each other.

Ronnie sensed there was more on the singer’s mind. Giving the boy a few more moments to ask before bringing it up himself. “Can I ask you something, while we’re talking that is?”

“Yeah… sure, go ahead.”

“I know the other night you said you never want to be… a monster like me, but you know what that means then?” The older man took a sip of his wine, eyeing Andy’s reaction.

“Yes, I know what it means…” Andy shifted in his seat, nervously biting at his lip ring.

“It means eventually, I’ll lose you… one way or another.” It pained the man to speak the words into existence. Having lost Andy once, he had no desire to suffer through that again.

“But not for a long time…” Andy said, seeing the solemn look on the older man’s face.

“There are no guarantees on life, Andy. I know that better than anyone.”

“Isn’t that what makes it meaningful? Ronnie, promise me that no matter what you won’t turn me… that you would always let it be my decision…” Andy’s voice was quiet, a serious tone to it.

The boy had no idea how hard of a promise that was to make. If Andy was dying and he had the ability to change that, would he be able to watch him die? The one human on the planet that he would ever feel so strongly about? Would he let him go forever? Knowing that life would never seem as bright again without him. Ronnie didn’t have an answer to that question, yet Andy was demanding one.

“I promise you…”

Andy could hear the hesitation in the man’s voice. He didn’t need to ask Ronnie what he would prefer, he knew the answer. He knew the risks he was taking being with him. Tour would give him time to clear his head, think things over one more time. It scared him that there was a part of his heart willing to make that leap. To die if it meant forever with the man in front of him.

“Is there anything else? Any other part of this that you haven’t told me?” Andy asked; he couldn’t take any more surprises.

Was this the right time to tell Andy? There was no reason he had to know, especially since Ronnie wasn’t even sure how it worked on the human side of things. Andy would have questions he didn’t have answers to, and it might even push him away. He still hadn’t gotten over the shock of finding out he had been secretly dating a bloodthirsty vampire. Finding out he was in some weird eternal blood bond with one probably wasn’t something he wanted to hear.

“No… you know everything now.” The older man motioned to the waitress that they were ready for the check.

Ronnie leaned his shoulder against the sliding glass door, watching the singer outside. Andy had his elbows propped up on the balcony railing, a lit cigarette between his fingers. He had been uncharacteristically quiet since the two had gotten back, staying silent most of the car ride.

Ronnie wasn’t a fool; he knew things wouldn’t go back to normal immediately. Andy’s concerns were real, as was his anger. He didn’t sign up for this, how could he have known? Yet, he’d come back, and that had to mean something. If they were truly bound to each other, that meant they could overcome anything, right?

“It’s such a beautiful night out…” The older man commented, stepping outside to join the singer.

Andy exhaled, the smoke dancing above his head. Flicking the end of the cigarette before glancing over at the man. “Yeah… it is…”

Ronnie sighed, pushing his hair back. “When do you leave for the tour?”

“In about two weeks. I’ll be back in May.” Andy answered.

“God… that’s such a long time.” Ronnie frowned. Three months almost; that would be torture.

His band was doing a small tour, a few weeks just to get some shows in. It would distract him for a bit, but he hated the thought of Andy being gone for so long. What if he got hurt on stage, or sick? What if something happened while the bus was on the road?

“It’ll go by fast.” Andy brushed the comment off.

The truth was he was already having anxiety about being away for so long. He kept telling himself it would be good for him. Being on tour, performing every night; it would clear his mind. Allow him to get away from the insanity that was his new reality. He could evaluate things more logically and figure shit out. It wasn’t like he’d be alone; Matt would be on the tour with him. If it was such a good thing, then why did his heartache?

“There might be some overlap in cities… between my band. Or I could come to see you… if you wanted.” The older man offered.

“Ah… maybe. It depends…”

Andy put his cigarette out, turning to go back inside. Ronnie stopped him before he reached the door, stepping in front of him. His lips in a slight frown.

“Earlier you said if this is going to work you had rules. Well, you said your rules. I agreed to them. So now the question is, do you _want_ this to work?” There was a bite to the man’s voice. Andy couldn’t tell if it was annoyance or hurt.

“It’s not that I don’t want it to, it’s that… how can it?” Andy answered, putting up his shields. Anything not to face the tidal wave of emotions he was feeling.

“There’s only one way to find out. I know that we’ve only been together for a couple of months but… I know how I feel about you. And believe me, the last thing I thought I’d be doing right now was falling in love.” Ronnie watched the singer’s reaction.

Andy had to know this wasn’t like him. Pouring his heart out, asking someone to stay. He’d never done that before in his life, even before he’d been turned. Andy looked down at his boots, his hair falling down into his face.

“I love you… I really do. And I just want to know if you feel the same… if you still love me now that you know what I am?”

Andy inhaled sharply, feeling tears prick at his eyes. His heart and his brain wanted two different things and they were raging an all-out war. Ronnie putting him on the spot didn’t make it any easier.

Ronnie could sense the boy’s hesitation. Pushing him to give an answer wouldn’t do anything but upset both of them. “You don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to… or don’t know… I know you’re probably overwhelmed…”

“I’m sorry…” Andy looked up, his heartbreaking at the saddened look in the older man’s eyes. He felt like a complete asshole for not being able to answer. But how was he supposed to? He’d never felt something so intense before, so overwhelming that words couldn’t describe it.

Andy wrapped his arms around the man, resting his head against Ronnie’s shoulder. The scent of his cologne was calming, bring at least some ease to his mind. The muscles in his back relaxing as he felt Ronnie’s tattooed arms embrace him.

Ronnie tiled the singer’s chin up, kissing him gently. He’d wait forever for Andy. However long he needed to go to prove to him that he meant what he said. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's taken me so long to update with the next chapter. My class got crazy busy going into my final exam and I had to focus on that. But I have a few weeks break now so I'll be updating this story and my Andy/Matt one more regularly!


	14. Death Is Like A One Way Ticket

**Chapter Thirteen: Death Is Like A One Way Ticket**

_March 26th, 2011: Las Vegas, NV_

What had started as a slight cough had turned into the full-on flu somewhere between San Diego and Las Vegas. Nausea and body ache waking the singer up only a few hours after he had managed to pass out in his bunk. Less than two weeks on tour and he was already sick, that was a new record.

Andy shuddered as another wave of chills came over him, his muscles throbbing from the fever. He wasn't sure what was the result of whatever virus he'd come down with and what was a hangover from a night of drinking. The singer had spent most nights since the tour started playing a game of Russian Roulette with his liver.

He told himself that it was part of touring; that he performed better after a few shots. It loosened him up and he felt more confident with the help of a little liquid courage. The aching feeling in his chest every night was something he couldn't ignore though. The real reason his drinking had increased to more than just the occasional binges. Leaving Ronnie behind had been harder than he'd anticipated.

Andy turned over in his bunk, trying to get comfortable despite the fever he was trying to sweat out. He kept thinking back to that night at the restaurant and the two weeks leading up to his departure. Together but not together; an awkwardness had grown between them that wasn't there before. Ronnie had spilled his heart out, giving it to the younger man to break.

The singer sighed, looking out the window at the highway passing by. Had he only mustered the courage to say those words back, maybe he wouldn't be as miserable. Instead he'd clammed up, not saying anything. He could tell that Ronnie was hurt despite his tough-guy exterior. The days that followed left both of them in a state of confusion. Andy had spent most nights with the older man. Their time filled with random B-list movies, awkward conversations about trivial topics, and a few flings under the covers.

Ronnie had kept his word about the vampire thing being separate. He waited for the younger man to fall asleep before going out and hadn't brought the topic up since that night. Doing exactly as Andy had laid out, yet still, there was a distance between them that seemed destined to never fade. Try as he might, Andy couldn't forget the truth and he couldn't push the questions it provoked out of his mind.

The thought of cutting things off for good still filled him with an overwhelming sense of dread. Since tour started, he'd contemplated the idea a few times, always ending up shaking and struggling to breathe. His chest tightening and threatening to suffocate him. Something had to change, he just didn't know what.

The bus hitting a pothole was enough to send the singer bolting towards the bathroom, his knees hitting the cold floor hard enough to bruise them. Remnants of the previous night's alcohol burned his throat as it came back up. Instead of feeling better, he only felt worse. His headache was now a borderline migraine making he felt weak and dizzy. With only hours before the show, he knew he was fucked.

Andy winced as he laid back on the floor, barely having enough room in the cramped bathroom. He tried to close his eyes, waiting for the lightheadedness to pass when a buzzing in his back pocket pulled his attention away.

"Fucking Christ..." the singer cursed, managing to answer the call right before it was sent to voicemail.

"H-Hello?" he answered, surprising himself with how raw and ragged he sounded.

"Andy? Are you alright?" Ronnie's voice came through the small speaker on the phone.

Andy pushed himself up; sitting against the wall, not daring to leave the bathroom yet. The nauseous feeling hadn't passed.

"I'm sick." Andy groaned as if it weren't painfully obvious enough.

"Like hangover sick or sick-sick?" The younger man could hear the worry in Ronnie's tone. He was leaving for his own tour in a couple of days, he should be focused on that. Not worrying about him, Andy thought.

"Fucking both... goddamn I feel like absolute shit." Andy rubbed the bridge of his nose, a part of him wishing that the other man was there with him. Missing the comfort that his presence gave, or at least what it gave before that night...

"You're not performing tonight, right? You sound awful... you should probably go see a doctor."

"I'll be fine... besides, it's only an hour set. I can make it through that." Andy insisted, trying to convince himself more so than Ronnie.

There was silence over the line and for a moment Andy wondered if Ronnie had hung up on him. A deep sigh confirmed he was still on the line.

"Andy... you should be resting. Where are you at right now?"

"The bathroom floor on the bus..." Andy bit his lip waiting for the man's response.

"Do you want me to come down? You're in Vegas, right?"

"Ronnie... you don't have to do that. Really, I'm fucking fine... it's probably just some virus. I'll be fine by tomorrow." Andy insisted, despite feeling worse than when he had woken up.

Another long pause.

"Do you want me to come?" Ronnie asked again, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"There's no need to drive all the way out here. I'm starting to feel better already." Andy replied, doing his best to sound convincing.

"That's not answering my q-" Andy ended the call before the man could finish his sentence.

Andy pushed his hair back, the sinking feeling in his chest making his eyes water. He was supposed to use the time on tour to think things over. Decide if there really was a plausible scenario in which this could work. He knew in his heart the answer was no, but he didn't have the strength to say that.

It was his fault for even getting involved. He'd broken his cardinal rule; don't get attached to people. His feelings for Ronnie were so intense; completely head over heels in a way he thought only existed in cheesy romance novels. And for the first time in a long time, he had been happy. After years of pretending that he didn't give a fuck about love he'd let his guard down and found someone he could share his heart with. Now it felt like a cruel joke. He had fallen in love with someone who didn't even have a heartbeat.

The Band-Aid needed to be ripped off before it went any further. It would hurt like hell, but it would be better for them both.

Ronnie ignored the speedometer slowly inching its way up to 90 mph as his car sped down the highway. The past three and a half hours had flown by; lost in thought. He wasn't stupid, he had felt the awkwardness between him and Andy over those couple of weeks. How he tensed up whenever the older man would try and put his arm around him. Avoiding texts and calls the past two weeks, claiming he 'didn't have service' whenever Ronnie would ask him about it.

Hanging up on him had been the final straw. If Andy wanted to end things, he needed to be a man and do it. Ronnie had done his part; he'd stayed true to all of Andy's wishes.

"Blood bond my fucking ass." Ronnie scoffed, gripping the steering wheel tighter.

He shook his head, laughing bitterly. He'd let some twenty-year-old kid with a pretty face fuck him up. If all that shit the men at the prison said was true, then wasn't Andy supposed to feel it too? Because if he had to wager a bet it would be that Andy was done. Not that he put too much blame on him, who in their right mind could love someone like him? A monster.

Ronnie had to swerve into the exit lane last minute, almost missing it. If he was honest with himself, he knew his rage was just misplaced heartbreak. He would do anything for the singer, there wasn't a single thing Andy could do to make him stop loving him. There was no changing what he was though, he would have sold his soul to the devil already if there was.

The car screeched to a halt in the parking lot behind the venue. The sun already set; the dry desert air unseasonably cold. The older man paused, sitting in his car and giving himself one last chance to turn back around. Four-hour drive? Might as well see it through to the end.

His boots clicked against the pavement as he stormed through the lot, not quite sure where Andy even was. His answer was waiting for him on the back steps of the venue. The singer was sitting on the top step in his stage clothes, smoking a cigarette.

Ronnie watched as he leaned over, resting his head against the man sitting next to him. The older man's blood started to boil as he watched the two. The guy was a bit taller than Andy; dark brown hair and a soft smile. Ronnie knew him, they'd toured together before. Matt Good. Andy had mentioned something about his friend Matt being on the tour before he left, he just hadn't put two and two together.

Thoughts started racing through his head. Was this why Andy didn't want him to come? How much did Matt know about him, what had Andy told him? Was he overreacting? Matt draped his arm loosely over the singer's shoulders, reigniting the furry Ronnie had felt.

"Do you love him?" Matt asked, placing an arm around Andy.

Andy bit his lip, the fever making his emotions even more intense. He had to go on stage in less than twenty minutes, but he was anything but ready. Matt had walked off stage and found him on the verge of a panic attack in the dressing room. The older man pulling him outside for a heart to heart much to the protest of John.

Matt knew about him and Ronnie. Andy had told him about how they met, and that things were on the rocks right now. He left out the whole 'undead vampire' part, making up a generic excuse as to why things weren't working out.

"I do... but fuck, I just can't do this anymore." Andy sighed, swallowing hard.

"I'm sorry... I know how much this shit sucks." Matt replied, taking another drag of his cigarette.

"What the-" Andy's heart dropped in his chest as he looked up to see the Ronnie walking towards him.

Matt stood up, stepping in front of him and blocking Ronnie's path. Andy cursed under his breath, his muscles aching as he stood up, pushing past the guitarist. "Matt- just let me..."

"Ronnie, what the fuck are you doing here?" Andy snipped, noticing the pissed off look on the older man's face.

"Is this why you fucking hung up on me this morning?" Ronnie shot back, motioning to Matt.

"Are you being serious right now? I told you Matt's my friend. I also told you that you didn't need to fucking come out here."

"Oh, I got that message loud and clear when you hung up the phone on me like a child, _sweetheart_." The last thing Ronnie wanted to do was fight with Andy, especially now.

He sensed it almost immediately, Andy was defiantly sick. His face was paler than normal, and his bright blue eyes were bloodshot. His thin frame shook as a gust of wind blew through the lot. 

"Well, what was I supposed to say? No, I didn't want you to come? Is that what you wanted to hear?" Andy yelled, his voice straining.

Matt backed away towards the door, taking his cue to leave. "I'll uh... try to stall John while you two... work this out," he said before slipping inside.

"Andy just fucking say it already. Enough with the games." Ronnie braced himself for the truth he knew was coming.

"You know what... fuck it. I'm done. I can't do it. We're not going to fucking work, I don't know why we ever pretended it could." The singer felt his heart shatter as the words left his lips.

"Andy..." Ronnie started, reaching for the boy's hands.

Andy yanked them away, shaking his head. "No. This needs to be over. It never should have even started. Fuck... what was the plan, Ronnie? Turn me? Or watch me get old and die? Cause those are the two fucking options. So why don't you find someone who will make that choice with you. Because it isn't me."

Ronnie knew that Andy was right. Their future together had two paths, both of which ended in death. Andy had made his feelings of being turned clear, sealing the man's fate. He would lose Andy one way or another.

"Andy... fuck... you don't understand... there is no finding someone else for me." Ronnie paced in front of the singer, pushing his hair back.

"Why? You've only known me for a few months. Just find someone like you and forget about me." Andy could feel the tightness in his chest returning as he struggled to keep it together.

"That's not how it fucking works!" The older man snapped, the frustration and heartbreak boiling over. "I can't find someone else, Andy. Do you not feel it? That night at the bar for instance, when I found you in the bathroom? Do you think I just ran into you? No, I was _drawn_ there. When I called you this morning, you think that was by chance too? No, I felt that something was wrong!"

Andy felt his heart racing in his chest, the sick feeling from the morning returning. Ronnie was making this shit up, he had to be. He was just trying to buy time, say something that would make him take back the breakup.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Andy hissed.

"I thought it was bullshit. I really did. A human-vampire bond, not true. And then I met you, and my whole world changed..." Ronnie watched as Andy started to back towards the door, his head shaking in disbelief.

This wasn't the way he wanted Andy to find out about the bond, or whatever the hell it was. He wanted to wait until the moment was right, not dump it on him in the heat of a breakup. The look on Andy's face was the exact reaction he was afraid of.

"No... whatever it is you're talking about; I don't feel it... because _my_ life would be a whole lot better without all this shit in it..." Andy shot back, pointing a finger at the vampire.

The older man watched, frozen in place, as the singer slammed the door behind himself. His world completely crumbling. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So sorry for not being able to update very often on this story or my Matt/Andy one. School has been very intense and consuming all my time. But there are only a few weeks left in the semester!!!


	15. Gravity

**Chapter Fourteen: Gravity**

Disaster would be putting it lightly. Somehow Andy had managed the strength to get on stage, letting the rush of adrenaline carry him through the first few songs. Still in a state of utter shock after what had happened outside. He tried to push the thoughts from his mind along with the overwhelming feeling of emptiness that had taken residence in his heart. The show ended up being cut short, the encore being scrapped after he, on more than one occasion, found himself throwing up side stage. Barely out of view of the screaming crowd of fans.

He had anticipated the heartbreak, but the sense of relief he’d expected to find after severing ties was absent. As he made his way off stage all he felt was the crushing weight of regret and sorrow. Hoping that by some miracle, Ronnie would be waiting for him. That he would have somehow seen through the hallow words.

“Andy… hey man, are you going to be okay?” Matt called after his friend, running after him as he made his way towards the back entrance.

“Please just leave me alone. I don’t want to talk right now.” Andy warned, making his way outside to where he’d left Ronnie.

The parking lot was starting to empty as kids left the show and the crew started to load the buses back up. The singer searched the rows of cars from his vantage point on the steps, looking for any sign of the older man. Ronnie’s car was gone from where he had parked it, not surprising after the death blow he had delivered to the man’s heart.

Andy gripped the railing as a sudden wave of dizziness overcame him, the fever still raging inside him.

He had been through breakups before, but this was unparalleled by any of them. It was as if his heart had been ripped from his chest, a physical pain felt deep in his ribcage. How could he have made sure a horrible mistake? Fuck what his brain had been telling him to do, he didn’t care if their future together was improbable. He needed him.

If what Ronnie said about some type of bond was true, then what did that mean? The pull he felt towards the man wasn’t the normal attraction he’d experienced before. It was like gravity, a force of nature. Was that what the bond was? A law of the universe? And if it was had he just broken it?

Andy pulled his phone out of his jacket, hitting call on Ronnie’s contact. His heart pounding in his chest as he waited to hear the dial tone. Almost immediately the call went to voicemail, indicating that either his phone was off, or he’d blocked the singer. He tried to text him, getting an error message that it couldn’t be delivered.

“Fuck… please…” Andy begged, trying to will the message to go through.

Ronnie stirred the contents of his drink around with his straw, sitting alone at the hotel bar. He hadn’t moved since he’d checked in two hours ago; too emotionally spent to make the four-hour drive back to L.A. His phone laying on the table, completely drained of battery. Not that it bothered him, there wasn’t anyone he gave a shit about contacting.

How was he supposed to go through the rest of eternity knowing that he’d never meet someone who would make him feel as alive as he had the past few months? The closest he’d gotten to feeling human again had been when Andy was by his side; giving him a purpose in an otherwise meaningless existence. Whatever success he had in the music industry, whatever success his new band found wouldn’t last. Eventually, people would start to question why he wasn’t aging; forcing him to either fake his own death or fade into nothingness. Being famous and a vampire? The universe really had it out for him.

Ronnie put his hand to his chest, rubbing at it as the tight feeling inside intensified. Would the bond ever break, or would he be forced to feel the emptiness and despair that came from being apart? 

He’d thought about going back to the venue, finding Andy, and forcing him to hear him out. Using everything in his arsenal to try and change the younger man’s mind. He felt sick to his stomach as a more insidious thought crossed his mind. Of sinking his fangs into the singer’s neck, forcing him to ingest his blood then draining him. Forcing the boy to join him in the curse. If he did that Andy would never forgive him, and he would never forgive himself.

Andy struggled to make his way onto the bus, his legs exhausted from the show. He needed to sleep whatever this thing was off, but he doubted sleep would come easily tonight. If it wasn’t for the fever numbing his brain, he knew he’d be an emotional wreck.

“We’re checking you into a hotel. You’re seeing the doctor tomorrow.” John stated, the tone of his voice making it clear that it wasn’t up for debate.

“We have a show tomorrow night, I’ll be fine.” Andy pushed back, collapsing onto the couch in the front lounge.

“You really think you’re going to be able to perform tomorrow night? No, you’re going to see the doctor tomorrow, cause I can’t have you dying on tour.” His manager insisted, walking up front to sit next to the driver before Andy could get another word in.

Sleeping in a real bed would be good for him, but it was the last thing he wanted at the moment. To be alone in a hotel room, with nothing to do but think about how he might have just pushed the only person who truly loved him out of his life. That sounded like the opposite of what he needed.

He knew reality would hit him like a ton of bricks the second he was alone. His mind could be an incredibly dark place at times, and loneliness always brought out the worst. Was Ronnie feeling the same way right now? He still hadn’t heard a reply from the man, or any sign his texts even went through. He was probably back in L.A by now. Andy wished he could be there; to beg for forgiveness. To get him back.

The ride to the hotel was short, and within thirty minutes the singer was holding the keycard to his room on the second floor. The hallways were oddly quiet for being right outside of Vegas.

Andy pushed the door open, tossing his duffle bag onto an empty bed. He was still in his stage clothes and makeup, having not bothered to take it off at the venue. He sighed, grabbing a pair of pants and a T-shirt from his bag before starting the shower. The hot water felt good on his aching muscles. The water running black as it washed the body paint away; washing away the character he put on every night.

Without his shield of armor on anymore, his walls came crumbling down. Tears falling freely down his cheeks as air became harder to get into his lungs. It didn’t feel real that things could just be over. Despite the short span of their relationship, Andy couldn’t imagine a future without the man. That wasn’t like him, with all his past relationships it had been a matter of having fun. As soon as the fun stopped, he lost interest and moved on. Sure, he thought he had serious relationships before, but none could hold a candle to this.

And yet… he’d given it up; because of fear and uncertainty?

Andy got out of the shower, wrapping a towel around himself before checking his phone. Several notifications but nothing from the one person who mattered. Ronnie should have made it home by now, which meant that he didn’t want to hear from the singer. Andy didn’t blame him, but at the same time, he would give anything to be able to have just a few moments.

Pulling his leather jacket on, he grabbed his cigarettes and lighter. He needed to clear his head; fuck being sick he needed a hit of nicotine. Making his way through the halls he started to regret the decision, his body begging for him to stop and lay down. Self-care was the last thing on his mind though, he didn’t give a shit about his health.

Andy paused as he approached the lobby, glancing over to the small bar in the corner. Blacking out had never been more tempting than it was now. Drinking until he didn’t feel the pain anymore, consequences be damned. That’s when he saw him.

A red leather jacket that made his heart skip a beat. A man sitting at the bar, his head propped up on his by his hand. Multiple empty glasses in front of him making Andy wonder how long he’d been there.

The singer shook his head, convinced that he was merely hallucinating things. The fever must have gotten to him, either that or it was the sleep deprivation making him go insane. There was no way that he would actually be here. The chance that they would end up at the same hotel only hours later was too low. Plenty of people wore red jackets; Ronnie was back in L.A.

Andy bit his lip, looking towards the door before back at the man. Then slowly making his way over to the bar. Hoping that the man would turn around and it would confirm it was just some stranger drinking his sorrows away at a hotel bar.

Ronnie could sense someone approaching him, their heartbeat unusually fast. Their scent made his blood run cold, evoking a strange mix of emotions inside him. The older man spun around; a pair of bright crystal blue eyes stared back at him.

Andy stood there, motionless, his lips parted in shock.

“W-What are you doing here?” He asked, his voice hoarse from being sick.

“I decided to drive back in the morning… what are you doing here?” Ronnie looked the boy up and down.

Had Andy known he was here, like how he’d known where the singer was that night at the bar? They were supposed to be driving to the next venue, not staying in a hotel.

“John said I should see a doctor in the morning… fuck…” Andy ran his fingers through his still damp hair. “Ronnie…”

Andy looked like he was on the verge of tears, either that or he had been crying. The urge to wrap his arms around the boy and never let him go was overwhelming. He bit his lip as he stayed silent, watching Andy struggle to speak.

“Back at the venue… look, I didn’t mean to be so harsh… I just- I didn’t expect you to fucking drive out there and then… I just-” He managed to get out, not making much sense as he stammered on and on.

Ronnie put a hand up, shaking his head. “It’s okay… really. I get it, I do. You don’t have to apologize for being honest with how you feel.”

The older man stood up, adjusting his leather jacket. He needed to get out of the hotel, whatever reason the universe had decided to bring them back together for could get fucked. Andy had said he didn’t feel the bond and Ronnie was over begging him to change his mind. He had more pride than that.

“Goodbye, Andy.” He whispered, pushing past the boy towards the front doors of the lobby.

The sound of boots clicking on the pavement behind him brought him to a stop outside. The aching in his chest was starting to turn to anger. Andy couldn’t break his heart and a couple of hours later come running back. He had plenty of time to make up his mind about what it was that he wanted, he’d made his decision clear.

“Ronnie… please, wait-” Andy called out after him before going into a coughing fit from all the running.

“What the fuck do you want? Huh? Was breaking my heart once not enough for you? You want another chance? God… I really should have ripped your fucking throat out that night in my car.” Ronnie growled, spinning around to face the man.

“You don’t mean that… Ronnie, please… I made a mistake…” Andy pleaded, his heart still pounding in his chest.

“You seemed pretty sure of yourself to me.” The older man’s voice was cold and detached.

Inside he was cursing himself for being such an asshole. Andy had come running back to him, just like he’d hoped for. So why was he acting like he didn’t care? The singer looked like he was on the verge of passing out from exhaustion and fever, it wasn’t the time for payback and Ronnie knew that.

“I didn’t mean it when I said my life would be better without you… fuck… I love you so much that it fucking hurts… I-I’ve never felt like this about someone before… and it scares the shit out of me.” Andy choked up, losing the battle to keep the tears from falling.

“Fuck… I’m so sorry…” He covered his face with his hands, trying to hide the fact that he was crying.

Ronnie was shocked at the display of emotion. He hadn’t seen Andy cry before, he was always so controlled with his image. Never letting anyone see him crack. The closest he’d ever seen was that night at the bar when he found him having a panic attack. The sight of tears falling down the boy’s pale cheeks brought out an almost animalistic instinct in the older man. The world ceased to exist and all that mattered was stopping his pain.

“Andy… no, please don’t cry…” Ronnie stepped forward, wrapping his arms tightly around the singer and holding him close.

He stroked the singer’s hair, the anger he had felt just moments earlier fading. The heat was radiating off him from the fever, his body completely spent from lack of sleep and being sick.

“Come on, you need to be in bed…” Ronnie urged him, guiding him back towards the front entrance of the hotel.

Andy wiped the tears from his eyes, his head hurting worse from crying. Ronnie followed his lead back to his hotel room, staying close to his side. He knew there was an easy way to cure whatever was wrong with the younger man. One drop of blood and he would feel better; finally, able to get the sleep he desperately needed.

“You’re going to stay with me… right?” Andy asked, his muscles aching as he laid back on the bed. Just the walk back from the parking lot had made him feel dizzy and out of breath.

“Yes… I’ll stay with you” Ronnie answered, climbing into bed next to the singer.

Andy’s skin was paler than normal; his eyes bloodshot. He shivered despite being under the covers, but his skin was still burning up. Ronnie stroked the singer’s cheek with the back of his hand; they looked sunken in from dehydration.

“How are you feeling?” The older man asked.

“Like I got hit by a fucking bus… I think I might have the flu or something.” Andy replied, laying his head on Ronnie’s chest.

“I can… help you if you want…” Ronnie offered, if vampire blood worked for hangovers, it would probably work for the flu too.

“Help me, how?” Andy raised an eyebrow, looking up at the man.

“Well… my blood, it can heal humans” Ronnie waited for Andy to freak out, unsure if the rules about not bringing up the ‘vampire’ thing still applied. He wasn’t even sure if he and Andy were still broken up.

“… won’t that turn me?”

“Not unless you were to die with it in your system… but it will make you feel better.”

Andy bit his lip, debating the offer. He hadn’t felt this sick in a long time, and he’d forgotten how miserable it was. His body felt heavy and no matter what he couldn’t get comfortable. The dehydration and lack of food were starting to get to him, only making the muscle aches worse. Besides, if this was the flu there would be no way he could perform tomorrow night.

“How much do I have to take?”

“Just a drop… I promise nothing bad will happen” Ronnie rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, “You’ve uh… had it before.”

Andy looked at the man confused at first by what he meant.

“What are you talking about?”

“Remember that first night you stayed over? On New Year’s? And you woke up the next morning with a hangover? I put a drop in your coffee...”

Andy’s eyes went wide; had it not been for the fever making him weak he would have decked the man. If dying while having vampire blood in your system meant you would turn, then what would have happened if he’d gotten in a wreck? Or had a heart attack, or god knows what else.

Ronnie back peddled, the look in the singer’s eyes making him wish he hadn’t mentioned it. “I felt bad for you… but hey, see nothing happened!”

“Jesus… fuck, Ronnie…” Andy groaned, before relaxing back against the pillows, too drained to start a fight about it now.

He closed his eyes, trying to fend off the migraine that was forming inside of his skull. The thought of having to suffer through even another day of agony and fever made him actually _want_ to die. As did the thought of spending hours waiting in an urgent care just to be told to take some Tylenol and rest.

“Fuck it… okay… but just because I don’t want to have to cancel the show tomorrow.” Andy caved.

Ronnie smiled, relieved that he didn’t have to wait until the younger man was asleep to slip it to him. Andy looked away as he pricked his finger on the point of his fang, still not completely comfortable with the whole idea.

“Here.” The older man offered. The sight of blood bringing back vivid memories of the night he found out about Ronnie, causing the singer’s heart rate to speed up.

The taste was metallic but had an odd sweetness to it that didn’t register as blood. He swallowed, resisting the urge to panic at what he’d just done. What was stopping Ronnie from snapping his neck right now? Ensuring that he would become like him; that’s what he ultimately wanted wasn’t it? Andy tried to remind himself that Ronnie wouldn’t do that, he knew how he felt about turning. He would respect that, right?

The headache that he had felt coming on was starting to dissipate. His skin returning to its normal ivory color as his fever broke. The aching in his bones and muscles seemingly vanishing along with the fatigue and nausea that had plagued him all day.

“See… all better,” Ronnie whispered, brushing the boy’s hair back out of his face. 


	16. Virginia Is For Lovers

**Chapter Fifteen: Virginia Is for Lovers**

_April 19th, 2011 Norfolk, VA_

Andy tilted the wine bottle back, finishing it off. The alcohol wasn't doing much to ward off the butterflies fluttering about in his stomach. He kept glancing down at his phone, trying to will time to go faster. The last forty-five minutes had crept by at a snail's pace, half convincing him that the universe was intentionally torturing him. It had been three weeks since he saw Ronnie last.

Despite parting ways again on good terms, they still hadn't talked about the 'break-up'. They were back together, but it was obvious that things needed to be said. Andy regretted not asking about the 'bond' Ronnie mentioned during their fight in the parking lot.

He made a point to call Ronnie every night, granted the man was free. His band had started tour a little over two weeks ago which meant most of his free time was now spent sleeping, doing interviews, and playing shows. Still, he knew the conversation he wanted to have needed to be in person and it was the reason he hadn't slept the past two nights.

Having to be apart for so long was wearing on the singer. While he was on stage, he felt incredible, happy to be doing what he loved. Yet as soon as the stage lights would shut off and the crowds would dissipate, the sinking feeling in his chest would return. A frantic need to fill the void had led to him blacking out most nights, his reliance on alcohol steadily growing. Ronnie had started to pick up on it during their calls, although he rarely said anything.

Andy knew Ronnie worried about him. He worried about his health, his safety, and his well-being. Hence why he'd driven four hours to Vegas that night. As long as he was human, the older man would worry.

Andy had given the idea of turning more thought. His bitter opposition to it had softened, albeit only a little. He could see a scenario where in the future, a long time from now, that he could cross that line. For now, and the foreseeable future though, he wanted to remain human. There were so many experiences he wanted to have before dying, even if he did end up coming back. There were also more things he wanted to be certain of before agreeing to eternity. At 20 he had time on his side, if Ronnie and he were actually fated to be together then there was no need to rush.

One thing that he knew wasn't going to work any longer was denying reality. Ronnie had done as he'd asked, he'd kept the whole vampire thing separate. In their conversations, he never brought it up, but Andy could never erase the events of that night from his brain. There was only one option left, only one way he could free himself of the nightmares. He had to embrace it.

Tonight, they would be reunited again. Ronnie had a rare day off and as luck would have it their paths would cross in Virginia. Their next stop wasn't too far away which meant a night all to themselves was in store.

Ronnie's boots clicked as he walked down the bustling streets of downtown Norfolk, his eyes set on the venue in front of him. Fans in black war paint poured out of the entrance as security guards directed traffic. The older man couldn't help but chuckle as he overheard a group of girls talking about Andy. Giggling about how hot he looked and whether or not they had a chance with him.

Ronnie shook his head, taking one last drag from his cigarette before putting it out on the concrete. _How adorable_ , he thought to himself.

He glanced around as he slipped inside, eyeing some of the groupies fawning over two of Andy's bandmates. It was probably a mistake to have not fed before coming to a venue packed with people, but he was already running late.

"Hey, Rockstar, what do I have to do to get backstage?" Ronnie purred, leaning against the doorway to the dressing room.

Andy was standing in front of the mirror, fixing his hair. His torso only covered by the black acrylic paint he wore on stage. His long, slender legs clad in a pair of leather spandex leggings. His ruby red lips twisted up into a smirk at the sound of the man's voice.

"Why don't you close that door and find out?" Andy turned around, leaning against the counter.

"Oh gladly, love," Ronnie replied, locking the door behind him before making his way over to the singer.

Andy's lips tasted like whiskey as the older man pressed him back against the wall. A hand wrapped around the singer's throat just tight enough that he could feel his pulse underneath his fingertips. Andy moaned into the kiss; the sound was enough to drive Ronnie mad. There was no way they were going to make it to the hotel.

"You're late..." Andy whispered, breaking the kiss.

"Sorry, babe. Believe me, I got here as fast as I could. I missed you." Ronnie replied, glancing over at the bottle of whiskey on the counter. "Looks like you got a head start on the fun, huh?"

"Mm... I might have." Andy teased, feeling the shots he'd taken after the show.

Ronnie picked the bottle up, looking it over; Andy had put quite the dent into it already. He tipped the bottle back, taking a generous shot. Smirking as Andy started to undo his belt buckle, his crystal blue eyes full of lust.

"I missed you too..." The younger man added, sinking down to his knees.

"Is that so?" Ronnie chuckled, having to bite back a moan as he felt the boy's lips wrap around his cock.

He ran his fingers through the singer's hair, leaning back against the wall and letting his eyes slip shut. Moving his hips slowly as the singer sucked him off; he'd missed this part the most.

"Fuck this... get up." Ronnie moaned, pulling the boy up by his hair suddenly.

Andy yelped in response as the older man bent him over the counter, a hand on the back of his neck. Ronnie yanked his leggings down past his hips, caressing his bare ass. Moving his hands to the boy's wrist, grabbing them both and pinning them behind the singer.

A loud pounding at the door caught the man's attention, groaning when he heard the voice of Andy's manager demanding he open the door. Andy whined, muttering something under his breath that sounded like 'cock block'. Pulling his leggings back up and straightening his hair out before going over to the door.

Andy opened the door, raising an eyebrow at the blonde man standing in front of him. "Yes?"

"It's bus call," John stated a look of clear disapproval on his face.

\---

Andy turned over in bed, facing the older man. Ronnie smiled softly, his arm snaking around the singer as he pulled him closer. "I hate having to be away from you for so long..."

"I know... I do too... but there's only a couple of weeks left... then I'll be back." Andy replied, figuring now was probably the time to bring up the things he'd been thinking about since that night at the hotel.

"Ronnie?" Andy could feel his heart starting to race, no doubt giving away how nervous he was.

"Yes, love?"

"I've been thinking about things... and that night when you came to see me in Vegas you said something about a bond... what exactly were you referring to?" Andy asked, feeling the man tense up at the mention of their fight.

"Well... uh... I don't know, I'm not even sure it's real. It's probably just some shit someone made up." The older man lied, worried that if he got into it, Andy might decide he really was better off without him.

"Tell me... please?" Andy pressed, frowning.

"Fuck... okay." Ronnie inhaled deeply, trying to gather his thoughts so he didn't sound like a complete psycho. Although, after the whole 'you were secretly dating a vampire' talk how surprised could Andy really be?

"When I was in prison the guys... the other ones like me, talked about a human-vampire bond. I thought they were full of shit at the time... but basically, they said for every vampire there exists one, and only one, human soulmate. Odds are you'll never find them but if you were to... nothing would ever compare..."

Ronnie surveyed the boy's reaction, trying to decipher what was going through his head. He didn't look angry or freaked out which gave the man a little relief. Andy's crystal blue eyes focused on him, waiting for him to continue.

"What about humans? Do they feel it too?" Andy asked.

"I don't know much about the human side of it... I assume so. From what they said... everything else in the world ceases to matter except that person. And the connection is unbreakable... once you find the person, your life will never be the same."

"And you think I'm that person for you? Did you know that from the first night?" Andy's voice was timid, unsure of what to make of the things Ronnie was saying.

Ronnie stroked the boy's cheek; he could still hear his heart pounding and sense his nerves. "I know you are... took me a while to admit it to myself but... yeah I knew. When I tasted your blood, it was the most intense rush I've ever experienced... fucking stronger than heroin."

"What happens if the human is turned?" Andy paused, swallowing hard. "What would happen if you turned me?"

Ronnie's eyes went wide, taken back by the singer's question. Was that what Andy was so nervous about? Had he changed his mind? "I uh... I don't know actually... none of the others at the prison had any first-hand experience with it...

Andy bit his lip, if he turned would that break the bond? "If it's between a human and a... vampire... wouldn't that break it?"

Ronnie looked away, focusing on the blank TV screen. The same question had crossed his mind. There was one guy at the prison who knew a vampire that had found their human. It was the woman who had turned him; the man she fell for had been killed in a horrific car accident.

_"The bitch went crazy man, like Psycho crazy," Johnny said, laughing as he gestured to his head. "She found out and went on this fucking killing spree, ended up being locked in a mental ward."_

_He lit a cigarette he'd bumped off one of the guards, blowing a smoke ring out. "One of my buddies said she fucking staked herself with a wooden chair. Broke the shit right off in front of all the nurses and_ POP _-" He motioned, pretending to stab himself in the heart._

_Ronnie rolled his eyes; Johnny had a way of embellishing stories that made the inmate doubt everything he said. "Yeah, right man sounds like some fucking B list horror movie to me."_

_"True shit, brother! I'm telling you I hope I ain't ever find no human that means that much to me. Shit is a curse."_

"Ronnie?" Andy's voice drew the older man out of his flashback, not realizing he had just been staring off into space.

"I don't know that either... maybe, maybe not... why? It's not like you have to worry about it... you don't want this, right?"

The younger man shrugged his shoulders, his head still spinning from all the information. "I don't know... there's so much I want to experience as a human of course, but... I guess it's not completely out of the question..."

Ronnie hugged the singer closer; he didn't want to lose Andy ever... but he couldn't deny the twinge of guilt he felt. He hadn't had a choice in turning, and if he had, he never would have agreed to it. If Andy was only softening his position on the possibility to make him happy, then he would regret that. It's not like taking a major loan out, taking a new job offer or any other 'big' decision. It was eternity; no turning back.

"Andy... you don't have to do that for me."

Andy pushed him back, looking him in the eyes. "If I do it will be my decision, and it wouldn't be any time soon of course... years away. After touring.... Music... all of that. I mean fuck- I'd like to turn 21 first... probably even 30." He laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

"Of course, there's no rush." Ronnie nodded, the thought of Andy's mortality, even if it meant spending eternity with him, making him feel ill.

"I'd have to die... right?" 

  
"Well yeah... that's how the whole _undead_ thing works..." The older man chuckled, kissing Andy's forehead.

"Well I'm not ready to die any time soon, so I guess you'll have to put up with me having a heartbeat for a little longer."

"Deal." Ronnie smiled before capturing the singer's lips, pulling Andy on top of him.

The scent of Andy's hair as it fell down around his face and the feeling of his pulse beneath his fingertips was almost too much for him to resist. He wasn't going to make it through the night without feeding.

"Andy... why don't you take a shower and get ready for bed," Ronnie said, breaking their kiss. "There's something I need to... attend to..."

Andy sat back, not making a move to get up. "You mean you need to eat..."

"Yeah... probably should have done that before coming to the venue. But I didn't want to be even later." The older man admitted, kicking himself for not having done so.

He raised an eyebrow as the singer leaned in, placing his hands on either side of him. "I know I said I didn't want any part of it but... it's who you are... it's not fair for me to deny that." he whispered.

Andy hesitated before pulling back and brushing his hair to the side. Ronnie held his breath, unsure exactly what it was that Andy was doing. The hunger was only growing stronger, the sight of the singer's exposed neck threatening to make him lose control.

"Andy..." he warned before the singer cut him off.

"No... I know what you're going to say but, I want you to..." Andy stopped him, his tone seductive despite the fact that internally he was freaking out.

Was it stupid? Yes. Borderline suicidal? For sure. But he had to get over the trepidation and fear that had been haunting him since that night in the alley. He had to prove to himself that Ronnie wouldn't hurt him, that he could control the monster he'd seen that night. Perhaps it was also the whiskey he'd consumed at the venue making him braver than he should be, but either way, he wasn't changing his mind.

Ronnie sat up; his fangs visible as his thumb traced along a vein in Andy's neck. The singer's skin was warm, his pulse rapid and strong.

Andy winced as the man's teeth pierced his skin, the sharp pain quickly being masked by a euphoric rush. The nervousness dissipating as he relaxed, letting his eyes slip shut. Ronnie gripped a fistful of his hair, keeping his neck exposed. Andy hadn't known what to expect; he'd been too distracted the prior times to realize what was happening. This was far from the horror he'd seen in the alley when Ronnie had ripped that man's throat out. It felt... good; really good. He felt _connected_ to the older man and he didn't want it to end.

"F-Fuck..." Andy breathed, starting to feel lightheaded from blood loss

Ronnie could feel Andy's body starting to weaken, forcing him to pull back before the boy lost consciousness. The burning hunger pains in his stomach finally subsiding. He guided the singer back onto the bed, brushing his hair out of his face.

"See, I knew you wouldn't hurt me," Andy smiled up at him.

"I love you so fucking much..." Ronnie whispered, in awe that he could be so lucky to have found the singer. 

"I love you too..." Andy echoed.

His head was still struggling to make sense of everything, mere months ago his view of the world had been so different. Vampires, blood bonds, living for eternity? That would have seemed like the plot of some cheesy romance novel, but he couldn't deny the truth anymore. He didn't need an answer to his question; the bond was a two-way street.

"You mean you don't think I'm completely insane?" Ronnie laughed, leaning down and pecking the singer on the lips.

"Nah... you're not insane... I feel it too." 


	17. Goodbye Graceful

**Chapter Sixteen: Goodbye Graceful**

_May 6th, 2011, High Desert State Prison_

The doors buzzed as a man in shackles was led in by two armed guards. A veil of dirty-blonde hair hiding his smirk. The cuffs dropped to the floor with a clank as they released him. The man adjusting the collar of his orange jumpsuit before taking his seat behind the bulletproof glass. His tattooed fingers wrapping around the corded phone, "Hello Ronald." His deep voice boomed.

"Johnny..." Ronnie replied, meeting the vampire's emerald-colored eyes.

"You missed me so much you had to come to visit me? How sweet." Johnny purred, flashing a pair of pearly white fangs.

"Yeah, because I missed being in this hellhole so much." Ronnie rolled his eyes before cutting to the chase.

Every second that he spent inside these walls was another step closer to insanity. He needed answers and Johnny was the only chance he had at getting them. After his talk with Andy in Virginia, he needed to know more about how the bonds worked. If he ever did end up turning Andy, he wanted to know what that would mean for them first.

Ronnie had gotten home for tour the night before, making the drive out to the prison early in the morning. Andy would be home in less than twenty-four hours which meant this was his last chance to make the trip without raising suspicions.

"I'm not here to chit-chat, I have some questions and you're the only person I know who can answer them," Ronnie stated, lowering his voice.

Johnny chuckled, sitting back in his chair and propping his feet up on the counter. "I see... and what questions might that be?"

"The bond," Ronnie stated; he didn't miss Johnny's arrogant nature one bit.

"The bond? I thought you didn't believe in that shit." The other man replied, his posture changing as he leaned forward; his interest peaked.

"You found yours, didn't you? That's why you're here..." He continued, raising an eyebrow at the former inmate.

"I might have..." Ronnie said, his voice barely above a whisper. He didn't want to tip any of the guards off; he had a feeling they knew that some of the prisoners weren't exactly... human.

"Fuck... what are the odds? Life's looking up for your Ronald. Out of prison, what, no more than a few months? And you've already found the love of your life." Johnny shook his head before his lips curled up in a deviant smirk. "Of course, if it was all peaches and rainbows you wouldn't be here talking to me, now would you..."

"I need you to tell me more about the bond," Ronnie stated, not interesting in getting into mind games with the vampire.

"I already told you what I know... not my fault you didn't want to believe it." Johnny huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back in his seat.

"What happens if the human is turned." Ronnie was starting to regret driving all the way out here. Johnny never took anything seriously when they were locked up together, why would it be any different now?

"Turned? I'm not sure... see we all haven't had the chance to run around as free men. Some of us are in for life." Johnny's tone had a bitter edge to it, his cheery demeanor slipping for a second.

"But in all honesty, I don't know what happens. I've heard rumors... I've heard that's what will break the bond... finally free you."

Ronnie felt his heart sink into his stomach. If that were true would that mean he and Andy were both destined for eternity alone? Would they both be happier without the bond?

"Of course.... I've also heard that it only makes the bond stronger... more _powerful_. Are you thinking about turning this human? Eternity is a long time brother... you better be sure."

If Johnny did know the answer he wasn't going to be forthcoming, and if he didn't then the conversation was useless. It was worth a shot Ronnie thought, but he didn't have any more answers than he did coming in. He didn't know any vampires outside of the prison; although he'd heard of a group of them not too far from Hollywood.

"What I do know... is if this human dies... let's just say the time you spent in solitary will feel like a walk in the fucking park. You'll be begging for a steak to the heart."

"Well, I don't plan on letting that happen." Ronnie's voice was stone-cold and serious, the warning sounding more like a threat considering the person it was coming from.

"Funny thing about that is... it ain't always your choice. I don't see this human with you right now. Life is such a fragile thing, Ronnie."

"You know the woman I told you about? Apparently, the guy... you know her human... dude started seeing his death right before he died. I think that's what got her... imagining she could have changed things..." Johnny's smile had turned into a sinister smirk, seemly drawing pleasure from the conversation.

"But hey... probably all bullshit, right? Just a coincidence. Or maybe just me making up things again... isn't that what you said to me before?" He added, snickering.

Before Ronnie could respond the doors buzzed again, the same guards moving towards Johnny with cuffs at the ready. Shackling his hands and feet not that either would do much to hold him if he decided to break free. Johnny's deep laughter echoed off the cement walls as they led him away, the doors slamming shut before him.

Andy slumped back in his seat, his head spinning from the previous night. Tour was officially over which meant a rather long flight from Ohio all the way to L.A. Made all the more unpleasant by his raging hangover. The bands had all thrown a huge end of tour celebration at their hotel, ending in alcohol poisoning for most involved. From what Andy could remember it had been fun, but he spent the night wishing that a certain someone was there.

The last few weeks had been harder than the first half of the tour. After Virginia, being away from Ronnie had become agonizing. Nightmares plagued the little sleep he managed to get. Counting down the days until they would be united again, drinking the sorrow away, and exhausting himself on stage was the only way he'd gotten through. He'd lost all interest in eating, sleeping, or being sober.

Andy took a sip of water, hoping the air sickness pills he'd taken would kick in soon (did those work for hangovers too?). He watched as the tarmac faded into the distance, replaced by white clouds and a sea of light blue. A little over four hours and he'd be home.

It was unlike him; to be so reliant on another person. To think that five months ago he was living the rock-star life, carefree and unchained. Hooking up with random people only to never see them again. Enjoying life on tour; different cities every night, drinking to make memories instead of to blackout. Was this what was in store for him now? Anxiety, longing, and sadness anytime he and Ronnie were apart?

It wouldn't be an issue for the next tour; both of their bands had snagged a spot on Warped. What about after that? The nature of their careers would have them apart more than they'd be together. Andy tried to tell himself that it would get easier with time but that hadn't been the case so far. In fact, the inverse seemed to be true.

The only thing that would make the time apart irrelevant was immortality. A couple of weeks apart meant nothing in the face of eternity. The singer had thought about the idea nightly, still, he had reservations about making that leap. Their last conversation had also sparked a new concern; if the bond was only between humans and vampires, wouldn't him turning break it? Ronnie hadn't known the answer which only added to the younger man's anxiety. What a cruel joke that would be; finally being together forever, only to lose the thing that made it all worth it. The longer he waited though, the more risk they took that something would separate them. He thought back to the earthquake in Japan; how his life had been at the mercy of mother nature. The unpredictability of death had haunted him since childhood.

"You alright?" CC asked his bandmate, noting Andy's unusual silence.

"Yeah... just feel like I've been run over by a truck is all," Andy answered, his eyes staying focused on the window.

"Fuck, man, me too. Last night was wild... wish I could remember more of it." The drummer laughed, trying to fill the awkward silence.

Andy's phone buzzed in his pocket with an incoming text. It was a message from Ronnie, letting him know that he'd be waiting at the airport for him. The singer's face lit up with the first genuine smile he'd had in weeks.

Ronnie stood up from his seat in the waiting area, his eyes scanning the people walking through the hanger. He had made it back to L.A just in time for Andy's flight to land, having spent the night hunting down a bunch of low life dealers in Vegas. It felt like Virginia had been an eternity ago; too long since he'd been able to spend more than one night with the singer. He was looking forward to having him around the house again, arriving home from tour to an empty apartment had been rather depressing.

He looked down at the gold key in his hand, twirling it between his fingers. Debating on whether to give it to Andy now or wait until they were back at his apartment. After Virginia, he'd made the decision to get an extra key made. Andy had been practically living there before tour so he assumed it would be a welcome gesture. Still, there was a nervousness in his stomach that was uncharacteristic of the normally calm, collected man.

He'd been on edge since he'd left the prison. Johnny had been a dead-end for answers, leaving him feeling even more conflicted about things. All that faded as he spotted Andy emerging from the corridor. The singer's long black hair and sunglasses obscuring most of his face, his lips twisting up into a smile when he spotted Ronnie.

"Let me help you with that, babe." The older man offered, taking Andy's carry-on back from him.

"I missed you..." Andy's voice was a bit ragged, and it was quite clear by the fit of his jeans that he'd lost some weight over the past few weeks.

His long black hair was tangled from teasing it nightly. His skin pale and stained with warpaint. Dark circles under his eyes making it clear that he hadn't slept in days. He looked absolutely drained.

"I missed you too, Andy." Ronnie echoed, starting to put the pieces together. The scent of day-old whiskey gave it away; Andy was hungover.

Andy threw his stuff down by the foot of the bed; the short walk from the car to Ronnie's apartment had wiped him out. All the stress of tour, lack of sleep, food, and drinking had taken its toll on his body. He laid back, covering his eyes with his forearm. The pounding in his skull making him dizzy. The bed sagged beside him, a hand running through his tangled hair.

"How much did you drink last night?" Ronnie chuckled, trying to hide his concern with the jovial tone.

"Too much." Andy groaned, rolling over onto his side. "One of the bands threw a huge end of tour party and they brought tequila."

Ronnie laid down beside the boy, rubbing small circles over his back. He could feel the indentations of his ribs and spine through Andy's shirt. "Well Warped doesn't start for a while, you've got time to recover and give your liver a break."

"Yeah..." Andy mumbled, trying to fight off the fatigue that had overcome him. The muscles in his back relaxing under Ronnie's touch.

"Do you want me to let you sleep? I can start fixing you something for dinner..." Ronnie asked, Johnny's words playing on a loop in his head. _It's not always your choice..._

Seeing Andy not taking care of himself scared the shit out of him. He might be young and resilient but that didn't make him bulletproof. Ronnie knew better than anyone where a life of drugs, drinking, and partying could get you. The truth was if he hadn't ended up in prison, he'd probably be six feet deep in a grave by now. Overdosed on heroin or coke; nothing but another statistic and victim of sex, drugs, and rock & roll. The thought that Andy might go down that road made him feel physically ill. Johnny was right, he couldn't be with the boy at all times. If something happened to him on tour, or when he was home alone there would be no saving him.

"Mm... not hungry... stay here with me..." Andy tugged the older man's arm over him, lacing his fingers with Ronnie's.

"Of course, babe..." Ronnie replied, pressing a gentle kiss against the singer's temple.

Ronnie smiled, watching Andy devour the dinner he'd cooked him. The color was already starting to return to his face, thanks mostly to the drop of blood he slipped into his drink.

"Thanks for making this, I don't know when the last time I ate something that didn't come from a convenient store or pizza box," Andy said, loading another forkful of pancakes and maple syrup.

"Yeah... you look like you've lost quite a bit of weight," Ronnie commented.

Andy went silent, looking down at his plate. The older man second-guessed his comment, worried that it might be a sensitive subject or something. He could tell that something was wrong with the boy; he had been unusually quiet since they'd gotten back to the apartment.

"I guess I haven't really been hungry lately... the last few weeks on tour were kind of hard... being without you and all." Andy trailed off.

So, it had been hard on him too... Ronnie wasn't sure how to feel about that. On one hand, it was comforting to know that Andy also felt the bond, but at the same time, it hurt him to know that Andy had been in pain. With their careers, it would be something they would have to deal with, but Andy couldn't just ignore his health whenever they were apart.

"Believe me, I wish I could have been there the whole time... I hate being away from you, love."

Andy nodded, his anxiety rising just from the memories of the sleepless nights drinking away panic attacks. He hadn't told Ronnie about those in their calls; he didn't want to worry him.

"Does it get easier... the whole bond thing? Because fuck... after the last time you visited it got pretty intense." The shakiness in Andy's voice making Ronnie frown.

"Fuck if I know, it's new to me too... all that matters is we're together now." Ronnie stood up, taking Andy's empty plate.

The singer followed him into the kitchen, opening up the wine cabinet. Searching through the various red wines until he found the one he was looking for, pulling it out and popping the cork. Andy tipped the bottle back, taking a long drink. Even though he was back he couldn't shake the anxious feeling that had taken hold of him since Virginia. He thought it would go away once he was back with Ronnie, but it was still there just under the surface. The growing fear that something bad was going to happen.

Ronnie glanced over his shoulder, noticing the boy nursing the bottle of wine. He set the dishes in the sink, walking over to Andy and taking the bottle from him. "You know I can tell when you're anxious, right?" he sighed.

"I'm not anxious... it's just... I'm just overthinking shit." Andy forced a smile; he could tell Ronnie was worried about him. "You don't have to leave for anything before Warped, right?"

Andy was thankful that Ronnie would be with him on that tour at least, but both their bands were booked through the end of the year all over the world. If things got any harder, Andy wasn't sure he'd be able to handle it.

"I do have to go to Vegas for a week to do something with the band but that's not for a few weeks. What are you overthinking about... is it what we talked about at the hotel?"

The singer's heart dropped in his chest when Ronnie mentioned he'd be gone for a bit. Without tour to distract him what was he supposed to do? He tried to push the apprehension down; he didn't want to seem clingy.

"Sort of... I don't know... maybe... maybe you should try to find out more about what would happen if you turned me..." Andy stuttered.

"Andy..." Ronnie shook his head, taking Andy's hands in his. "I don't know that there are any answers out there. It's incredibly rare to even find your match.... Why are you worrying about that? I thought you said that wasn't going to be for a long time?"

Andy bit his lip, "I don't know... I've been getting these nightmares that something happens and... m-maybe you should do it now... or soon, I don't know... fuck-" He was fully aware of how insane he sounded, but he couldn't stop the stream of words from coming out.

The last thing he'd told Ronnie was that he wasn't even sure he wanted to be turned, and if he did, he didn't want to do it for a while. He still wasn't sure, but he'd worked himself into a spiral thinking about what could go wrong between now and whenever that might be.

_Air painful to draw in, a crushing feeling in his chest, and a burning sensation in his lungs. Gasping for breath brought no relief, his vision fading to black._

The same nightmare on repeat for the last two weeks. He had no idea what it meant or if it even meant anything at all. Perhaps he was just being paranoid, letting his mind get the best of him. Either way, it had freaked him out enough to be willing to risk it all.

"Turn you? Now? Andy... no, that's not what you want. You said so yourself. There's no rush... you're just sleep-deprived and worn out from tour. They're just bad dreams, a few nights of good sleep should get rid of them..." Ronnie tried to soothe the singer, giving him a reassuring smile despite the sheer panic it set off in his own mind. _Johnny was just fucking with you Ronnie, get a grip on yourself._

"Listen... maybe after your 21st birthday if you still want this... then maybe... but not right now. Nothing bad is going to happen any time soon... I won't let it." Ronnie pulled the shaking boy into his arms.

"Okay..." Andy sighed, trying to believe the older man's promise.

"But... I do have something that might put your mind more at ease..." Ronnie added, breaking their embrace to reach into his back pocket.

Andy stared at the small key the man was holding up, not immediately catching onto what it was for. "A key is going to make me feel better?"

"Yeah... to the apartment... for you." Ronnie placed it in the singer's palm, watching as the boy turned it over, inspecting it. "You should move in with me... officially. If you want to that is."

Andy's bright blue eyes looked up at him; it wasn't like he didn't basically live with him already, but he figured it was time to formally invite him to move in. Truthfully, Ronnie didn't like the idea of Andy sleeping on some beat-up mattress in an apartment complex that would be better off condemned. He would be safer here.

"So, what do you say?"

Andy's face lit up, the anxiety melting away. He fished the keys to his car and current apartment out of his back pocket, slipping the new key onto the ring before leaning in and pressing his lips against Ronnie's. "Of course, I want to."

"Perfect. We can get the last of your things later this week." Ronnie beamed before pulling the boy back in for another kiss.

"Does this mean I have to pay rent now?" Andy chuckled, nipping at the man's bottom lip.

"In cash? No... in _other_ things... well..." Ronnie smirked, pushing the singer up against the wall seductively. "That I might require." 


	18. Sink Your Teeth Into Forever

**Chapter Seventeen: Sink Your Teeth into Forever**

_June 18th, 2011 6:45 AM_

Andy stared up at the black canopy above him, trying to even his breathing. His heart thumping wildly in his chest, his hands shaking. The singer had awoken in a cold sweat, another nightmare causing him to lose sleep. An impending sense of dread gripping his mind and making it hard to breathe. It was always the same dream; vague but terrifying, nonetheless. He swore he was finally losing it; not surprising considering how much his life had changed over the span of six months.

Most nights he was able to get back to sleep, but not tonight. Having Ronnie beside him eased his panic, helping ground him in reality again. Tonight, he didn't have that luxury. Nor had he the past five nights; Ronnie was in Las Vegas recording some tracks with his band. Andy had all but begged to go with him but to no avail. The older man had insisted he would be back before Andy had the chance to even notice, besides the release show for his new album was today.

Ronnie was going to miss the show but promised to make it up to the younger man when he got back. The idea of skipping out on the show himself and making the four-hour drive to Vegas had crossed Andy's mind more than once. He had no reason to be as anxious as he was, but with each day the panic seemed to get worse. Drinking was the only thing that got him through.

Andy clutched at his chest, his lungs feeling like they were on fire as he struggled to draw air in. Ronnie had noticed his drinking which ended up causing more than a few fights over the past couple of weeks. They never lasted long, but it didn't help the singer's anxiety. Andy kept the nightmares to himself for the most part. Besides mentioning it the day he got back from tour, he hadn't told Ronnie about the frequency of them. He could tell that the man knew something was up, but he didn't want Ronnie to worry more than he already did.

Andy sat up in bed, clutching the silk sheets and trying to will the panic attack brewing in his chest away. In a matter of hours, he needed to be up, getting ready for a day of press before the show. The band was playing Hollywood and Highlands to celebrate the release of Set the World on Fire. They had a signing at the Hot Topic beforehand which required him to be in full makeup the entire day. A night of no sleep meant he wasn't going to fare well.

"F-Fuck..." Andy gasped, starting to hyperventilate. He felt like he was going to throw up.

Trying to breathe deeply and walk himself back from the ledge wasn't working. Something wasn't right; the more he tried to calm himself, the worse it got. The sense of absolute terror wasn't subsiding no matter how hard he tried to push it away.

The singer's hand trembled as he pressed call on Ronnie's contact, praying that the man would answer. Andy cursed as the phone went to voicemail before trying again, this time getting a response on the second ring.

"Hello?" It was clear that Andy had woken the older man up by the sound of his voice.

"Ronnie... fuck, y-you have to come back home. Please, please just come back..." Andy begged, trying his hardest to keep it together enough to speak.

"Andy? Are you okay? What happened?!" Ronnie instantly woke up, the panic in the younger man's voice snapping him out of sleep.

"I-I don't know what's wrong... I can't fucking sleep and..." Andy had to pause to catch his breath, starting to feel lightheaded from the erratic breathing. "I just have this h-horrible feeling... please..."

Ronnie's blood went cold. Johnny's warning echoing in his thoughts. He had been telling himself that it was just the man fucking with him, but there was no denying that Andy was acting odd. Over the past few weeks, he could sense the boy's anxiety was heightened past its normal level. He could hear the singer crying on the other side, repeating his pleas for him to come home. It wasn't like Andy to be this dependent or emotional. Could it be the stress of his new album and upcoming tour? It could be. If what Johnny said was true though... Ronnie shuttered at the thought. He needed to get to him, just in case.

"Baby... please try and calm down... listen, I'm going to get there as soon as I can, okay?" Ronnie had to muster all his strength to keep his tone calm despite his own mind starting to spiral into worse-case scenarios.

"I'm sorry... I-I just can't take this feeling anymore." Andy laid back, hugging the older man's pillow to his chest.

"It's okay, love. I'll be on my way soon... you have the show tonight, right? I'll be there before you even do the soundcheck. Just... be careful... you'll be with the other guys, right?" Ronnie asked, throwing his things into his suitcase.

"Y-Yes... fuck... I have press all morning too." Andy replied, heavily weighing the choice to tell John to cancel his interviews.

"Okay... well, that will take your mind off things. I don't want you driving though... not in this state." Ronnie added, thinking of all the possible ways Andy could get hurt within the next four to five hours.

"John is picking us up. You promise you'll be here before the show?" Andy bit at his bottom lip, feeling guilty for forcing the man to drop everything for him. He shouldn't be acting like this, like a scared little child.

"I promise."

_7:30 PM: Los, Angeles, CA, Hollywood and Highland_

Andy checked the time on his phone, cursing under his breath. They had less than thirty minutes to go before showtime and Ronnie was nowhere to be found. The last Andy heard he was at a gas station two hours out; that had been around four. The singer had tried to call but only got a dial tone, the inability to contact Ronnie only adding to his stress level.

By the time he'd gotten into makeup and costume, he was a nervous wreck. It took him almost an hour longer than normal due to the shaking in his hands. He had to start the eyeliner over twice before finally managing to get the intricate design right. The bottle of wine he grabbed before leaving had only done a little to ease his anxiety. It was just enough to make it through press and the signing. After which he downed several shots of Seagram's with his band. By sound check he was wasted, having consumed enough alcohol to pickle himself. That should have been more than enough to stop the frenzied thoughts of death plaguing his mind; only it wasn't.

A loud ringing startled the singer, making him jump out of his skin before he realized it was coming from his phone. Immediately hitting answer, he felt his body relax as Ronnie's voice came through the speaker.

"Andy, fuck I'm so sorry. There was a massive accident on the highway. It shut down all the lanes for hours and there was no cell service." Ronnie's voice sounded frantic and Andy could hear the roar of his engine in the background.

"Jesus... are you going to make it?" Andy was noticeably slurring his words, giving away his intoxication state.

"Just barely... but I'm twenty minutes away." The man answered before pausing, "wait... are you drunk?" he asked.

"I had some shots with the guys..."

Ronnie resisted the urge to go off on the singer, of course, he was drunk. That's how Andy dealt with his problems, by drinking. There was nothing he could do about it at this point, but the idea of Andy being heavily intoxicated right now didn't sit well with him. If the weird sense of doom he had been talking about really was an omen, then he needed to have all his wit about him right now.

"You're not mad at me, right..." Andy hiccupped, regretting taking the shots so fast.

"No... fuck... please just sit down and wait for me to get there, okay?"

"Ronnie... is there something you're not telling me?" Andy asked, having a breakthrough moment of clarity.

"Andy, how long have you had this strange feeling that something bad was going to happen?" Ronnie asked, his tone serious.

Andy felt his heart start to race at the question, all but confirming his suspicions that the dream might mean something. "Since April... but it's gotten worse since you left. Ronnie, what's going on?"

Ronnie gripped the steering wheel tighter, pressing the gas pedal to the floor as he sped around a group of cars. "Because it might be a fucking warning, why haven't you told me this?!"

"I didn't want to worry you!" Andy shot back, clutching at the rosary beads around his neck instinctively. "A warning about what?"

The line went silent before Ronnie's voice came through again. "... of your death."

A cold chill went down the singer's spine. If he was being warned about his own demise, then why wasn't it more specific? How was he supposed to know when or how? Was there some psychotic killer in the crowd with a gun? An electrical malfunction at the show? Another earthquake? The possibilities were endless.

"Ronnie..."

"Look, I don't know that for sure. Alright, it could just be your anxiety or maybe the bond is fucking with your head. I don't know, that's why you need to sit there and wait for me." Ronnie insisted, the tires screeching as he took the exit ramp well past the speed limit.

"Okay..." Andy whispered, rolling one of the rosary beads between his fingertips.

Ronnie pushed past security, yanking his arm free when they tried to grab him. Only managing to get them off his tail when John appeared around the corner, letting them know he was allowed back. He followed the manager backstage where the band was waiting to go on, scanning the area for the singer.

Andy was pacing back and forth in the hallway, staying at a distance from the rest of his band. His baby blue eyes shot up to meet the older man's as he rounded the corner, visible relief evident on his face. He stumbled as he started towards Ronnie, almost losing his balance. Ronnie could smell the alcohol on him, Andy wasn't just drunk, he was completely wasted.

The boy wrapped his arms around him, "Fuck... you made it. Ronnie, what is happening?" He slurred.

Before Ronnie could answer him, John started to call for Andy to join the rest of the band for the curtain drop. The younger man looked towards his manager before back at Ronnie, with fear in his eyes. He didn't have time to explain things to Andy, about the prison and what Johnny had said. He didn't have time to ask him for more details about what he was feeling and to decipher if there were clues there. He had to act.

"Ronnie what are you-" Andy exclaimed before being cut off by Ronnie pushing him up against the wall out of John's line of sight. Piercing the skin of his wrist and forcing it against the singer's lips, holding it as Andy fought back against him.

"What the fuck?!" Andy wiped the blood from his lips, his red lipstick smearing. "What the fuck did you do that for?"

"I'll explain it to you later. Just please... fucking don't do anything stupid on stage tonight." Ronnie pleaded, hearing John's footsteps coming down the hall.

Andy still had a look of shock on his face as the blonde-haired man grabbed his arm, yanking him towards the stage. Ronnie fell back against the wall, looking down at his bloody wrist; the wounds already starting to heal. He didn't know if vampire blood worked prophylactically, but maybe it would. The truth was, he couldn't handle losing Andy. _If something happens on stage and he has my blood in him then.... No,_ _he's going to be fine... it's a short show. He'll be fine. He's not going to die._

Ronnie composed himself, making his way towards the sound of screaming fans and guitars. He took his place side stage among the other guests and crew members, crossing his arms and keeping a hawk-like focus on the singer. The guitars wailed and the drums shook the stage as the band launched into their first song.

The adrenaline and whiskey coursing through Andy's veins squelched the lingering anxiety in his stomach as the music started. Flipping a switch in his brain as his stage persona took over, the hoard of screaming fans producing a euphoric rush. The first song went by in a flash and by the second he was completely in the zone, his inhibitions dangerously low.

Ronnie bit at his nails nervously, as Andy made his way through the crowd. Every muscle in his body ready to react to danger. He felt his heart sink as the younger man climbed up the pilers that lined the side of the stage. Andy seemed to have trouble as he ascended them, his cowboy boots slipping a bit on the marble. _What part of being careful does this fucking idiot not understand?!_

Andy started to realize his mistake once he reached the top, having to grab ahold of the wall for balance. The guitar solo was coming up, giving him time to make it back on stage before the next verse kicked in. There was a gap between him and the stage, he just needed to clear the narrow hallway and he'd be fine. The thought of turning around and descending the same way he came up not occurring to him until it was too late. The words of warning Ronnie had spoken to him mere minutes before lost to a blackout. Ronnie watched in horror as Andy sat down on the ledge, extending a leg out over the gap.

"Andy, no!" he yelled, but the amps drowned out his voice. The singer couldn't hear him.

The sound of Andy's ribs hitting the opposite ledge was something the older man would never forget. The bones instantly snapping and splintering into shrapnel upon impact. His body falling onto the floor with a loud thud. Ronnie sprinted around the side of the stage to the hallway where Andy laid motionless on the floor. A mass of security and venue workers swarmed the boy, obscuring his view.

Andy moaned in pain; his vision full of black dots as he started to come to. A large bald man in a suit was on top of him, pressing his fists into his chest repeatedly in a desperate attempt to perform CPR. A sheering pain in his side almost causing him to blackout again with each compression.

"S-Stop p-please..." he choked out, trying to push himself off the ground and away from the man.

"Jesus what the fuck are you doing to him?!" Ronnie's voice cut through the noise around him, giving Andy something to focus on and stay conscious.

"Andy... what the fuck is wrong with you?!" The older man boomed as he made it back onto his feet, in too much shock to realize how wounded he was.

"I-I'm okay..." he replied in a hoarse voice, completely ignoring his threats not to get back on stage.

Ronnie went to stop the singer, not understanding how he could have fallen what was at least fifteen feet onto his ribcage only to get back up again as if nothing happened. He couldn't believe his eyes as Andy rejoined the band on stage who didn't seem to realize that he'd even been injured. The younger man seemed a little shaken but picked up the chorus to Children Surrender, his beautiful voice once again resounding through the venue.

 _It has to be the blood_ he told himself. It wasn't possible for Andy to have broken several ribs and continue to belt out the lyrics, raising his hands above his head and moving around the stage. Yet he was. Ronnie breathed a sigh of relief, convincing himself that he'd avoided catastrophe with his hail marry attempt to preemptively keep Andy safe from harm. The whole event already seemed like a blur as he made his way back to side stage.

That illusion of comfort started to crack as the band progressed into their next song, Andy was noticeably pale. His voice faltering during his screams, a few times wincing in pain when he turned the wrong way. His movements becoming less and less until he was essentially standing in place, clearly not well.

"John... he's hurt. End the fucking show what are you doing?" Ronnie growled, turning his anxiety on the manager.

"There's only one more song left, I'll make sure he gets checked out by a doctor afterward." The man replied, not nearly as concerned as he should be.

Andy's left side felt like it was on fire, the pain becoming agonizing by the final song. He stumbled forward a bit, feeling lightheaded and out of it. Something was wrong, he could feel the bones crunching together every time he moved his arms the swelling already starting to become noticeable.

The singer glanced over at Ronnie, who's face looked like a mixture of absolute rage and panic. He'd fucked up... badly. The pain was sobering him up, the dread returning with a vengeance.

"Ronnie... f-fuck make it stop..." he cried, the older man's tattooed arms catching him the second he walked off stage.

By this point the band had taken notice of Andy's clear injury, all of them looking alarmed at the rapid decline. Ronnie tugged him towards the emergency exit; Andy needed to be seen by a doctor immediately. The blood from earlier _wasn't_ working.

John called after him, demanding to know what was going on. Ronnie fought the urge to rip into him for letting Andy go back on stage in the first place. "I'm taking him to the fucking hospital like what should have already happened." He snapped.

Andy let out an agonizing scream as Ronnie forced him into the passenger seat, the pressure on his ribs more than he could handle. "Ronnie... make it stop!"

"I'm fucking trying babe... goddamn it Andy, what the fuck were you thinking!" The older man cursed, before once again biting the inside of his wrist and drawing blood.

Andy desperately swallowed it down, willing to do anything to stop the throbbing in his torso. He leaned his head back, praying that relief would come fast as Ronnie hopped into the driver's seat and revved the engine. The acceleration forcing the singer back, sending a wave of intense pain through him.

"It's not working... Ronnie... fucking hell." Andy groaned, the blood not lessening the pain in any notable way. If anything, it was only getting worse as the swelling continued, overcoming the whiskey's ability to mask it.

"What do you mean it's not working? No... that should be healing you..." Ronnie stammered, glancing over at the boy withering in agony next to him.

How was the blood not working? It didn't work before because Andy wasn't hurt, that had just been a hunch. Now that he clearly was injured, it should at least be mending some of the damage. He'd seen it happen countless times with the inmates in the jail. A couple of the humans had made an alliance with the vampires, forming a gang. Ronnie had seen a man get stabbed in the stomach just to have Johnny heal it with a drop of blood. His mind was racing; _but didn't I consume Fang's blood just before my death? I still died. No, no, that was because it was before or maybe because it was too close to the fatal blow?_

"Ronnie... I don't feel good..." Andy's voice was labored as he seemed to be having trouble breathing.

"Hold on love, the hospital is close..." Ronnie flew past the cars on the freeway, zipping between them and narrowly avoiding a wreck.

"I-I can't... b-breathe...." He choked out, each breath creating more pressure in his chest.

His labored breaths turned to gasps as he strained to get air in, completely unable to force it out. The muscles and veins in his neck bulging as he struggled. "F-fuck..."

This was it. This was the end. He could feel his grip on reality starting to fade as the lack of oxygen started to affect his brain. His heart being crushed by the pressure in his chest, the bone shrapnel resulting in a pneumothorax that was rapidly becoming fatal.

Ronnie could hear the boy's heart rate starting to slow as it lost the battle to overcome the pressure. Each breath bringing him closer to death. Andy was dying.

They wouldn't make it to the hospital. Ronnie swerved onto the exit ramp, flying through the streets of random businesses and into an empty parking lot.

"Baby... I'm not going to let you die... hold on." The older man begged, tears rolling down his cheeks as he watched Andy start to give up, his body going limp.

"No, no, no, no, no..." Ronnie forced more blood past the singer's lips, desperately trying to revive him before his heart gave out.

"Why is it not fucking working?!" He screamed, did it not work on Andy because of the bond? If Andy died would it even bring him back? This wasn't how things were supposed to go down; it was supposed to be Andy's choice.

"I-I... love you..." Andy mouthed, not even strong enough to manage a whisper.

"No... Andy... no, don't leave me..." Ronnie sobbed as the boy's heart finally came to a stop, his eyes slipping shut as an eerie silence set in.

Ronnie sat stunned in shock, cradling the younger man in his arms, waiting for a miracle. Waiting to wake up from what surely had to be a nightmare, because it was too painful to be reality. The complete numbness that overtook his heart was like nothing he'd ever experienced.

Somehow, he mustered the strength to climb back into the driver's seat because the next thing he knew he was back at his apartment. Carrying the boy's lifeless body into the bedroom and placing him onto the silk sheets.

"It's going to be okay, Andy..." he whispered softly, listening to the sound of the clock ticking as he sat frozen in time. Praying to a God he didn't believe in to bring the boy back. 


	19. We're Born Into the Night

**Chapter Eighteen: We're Born into the Night**

_June 19th, 2011 10:30 PM_

Ronnie wiped the smeared black paint from the singer's face, carefully removing the makeup with a damp washcloth. Andy's skin was cold to the touch, the tips of his fingers and lips had a blue tint to them. Dark purple bruises covered the left side of his torso, showing the extensive damage he'd sustained in the fall. The older man hadn't noticed the sun rising and falling, a full twenty-four hours passing since the incident.

Andy's phone kept ringing with multiple calls and texts from friends and family. Ronnie texted them back, tears pricking at his eyes as he lied to them. 'Andy just needs to rest, he's okay' he told them. He didn't have the strength to admit to himself that Andy was far from okay. There hadn't been a single sign of life since he brought the boy home. Ronnie hadn't heard of any vampires taking longer than a day to wake up, the process was anything but pleasant. If Andy was turning, he'd be the first he knew of to stay quiet.

He didn't understand; Andy had died with his blood in him. By all logic that meant he should have turned. What was the point of a human-vampire bond if the vampire couldn't save the human from death? The whole thing was starting to feel more like a curse than a blessing. He'd only gotten mere months with the boy before death cruelly ripped him away. Now he had to spend the rest of eternity alone? Knowing only what could have been? That wasn't a future he wanted; Johnny was right, he'd beg someone to drive a stake through his heart.

"Andy, please... you have to wake up... you have to..." Ronnie pleaded, fresh tears starting to fall.

He didn't care if Andy turning broke the bond, nothing could be worse than the emptiness he felt. The void in his heart was like a black hole, sucking up everything inside of him until there was nothing left. Nothing mattered anymore; not his band, friends, family, feeding, money, safety, anything... it was all meaningless without Andy.

"I fucking love you so much... I'm so sorry, Andy... I should have saved you. I should have gotten there sooner. I never should have left in the first place... I was supposed to protect you... fuck." Ronnie sobbed, laying his head on the boy's bruised stomach.

He was so wrapped up in regrets that he almost didn't notice the lack of swelling. His ribs somehow reforming, leaving only the discoloration as evidence he'd ever been injured.

Ronnie shot up, placing his hands over the singer's ribcage, feeling each rib as he counted them. Not a single one felt out of place and surely none of them felt like they had sustained a fall from fifteen feet.

"Andy?" Ronnie looked the boy over, watching as the blue tint faded from his lips and hands. His pale skin had an ethereal glow to it that was certainly not human. Even the dark splotches across his torso were starting to fade, yet still, his body remained perfectly still.

Andy was in agony, every muscle in his body frozen. Unable to talk or even open his eyes, he could do nothing but suffer as fire spread through every vein and artery. His bones feeling as if they were set to explode, his head throbbing with an intensity worse than any migraine he'd ever experienced. At first, he thought he was dead, this had to be Hell. The nuns had been right; he'd spend eternity burning alive with nothing to stop the pain. But then a voice broke through, one he'd recognize anywhere.

"Andy... I'm here..." Ronnie picked his hand up, kissing the back of it.

Andy gasped suddenly, air rushing into his lungs as his eyes shot open. Everything was magnified, every sound, scent, touch, and sight was overwhelming. A burning in the pit of his stomach that seemed insatiable. Even the air touching his skin felt like hot coals.

He let out a piercing scream, the agony evident in it. Clutching the sides of his head, his ears ringing from the faintest of sounds.

"F-Fuck... ah... oh god fuck make it stop!" he screamed, tearing at his own skin in a desperate attempt to make the pain subside.

"Andy... baby, stop. I know it hurts, but I'm here... I'm gonna help you." Ronnie tried to soothe the boy, grabbing his arms and restraining him.

"Get off of me!" Andy's strength surprised the older man as he broke free, grasping at his stomach.

The singer doubled over in pain, feeling like his organs were liquefying inside of him. "God... what did you do to me..." he moaned in pain.

Ronnie hesitated, not even sure if Andy recognized him. Did he remember him at all or had turning him wiped his memories of the last six months? Was that the trade-off or was it just the pain that made him not remember the last twenty-four hours?

"Andy... I had to; you were dying... don't you remember at the show? You fell..."

Andy's eyes went wide as the memories flooded back into his brain. _The nightmares, the feeling of dread and death. The show, too many shots to count, oh no I'm so high up; how do I get down? Pain. The splitting of bone. Gasping for breath. The agonizing sound of Ronnie's desperate screams. Darkness. Silence. Heart rating slowing, quivering before finally stopping. The end._

"No! No... fuck, no... no, no." Andy pressed his hand against his chest, frantically trying to feel for his heartbeat. Switching to his neck when he felt nothing. His heart sank as reality hit him in the face. No heartbeat, no pulse; just like Ronnie.

"Andy, I tried to save you, but it wasn't working. The blood wasn't healing you..." The younger man flinched as Ronnie placed a hand on his shoulder.

Andy turned around; his crystal blue eyes even more mesmerizing in death. "Why would you do this to me..." his voice sounded broken and small, it shattered the older man's heart.

"I couldn't lose you, Andy..." Ronnie studied the boy's face, looking for any hint as to whether Andy still felt the bond between them. Ronnie still felt it, if anything it had only gotten stronger.

Andy shook his head, glaring at the older man. "How fucking could you... I thought you said I wasn't ready! Fuck... did you even _try_ to save me? Or were you happy enough to turn me into a fucking monster?" Andy growled, the gnawing hunger getting worse by the minute.

Ronnie looked at the boy in shock, the callousness in his voice was unlike him. His last words as a human had been 'I love you'. "You don't feel it anymore, do you?"

"The bond? No... I feel fucking nothing. All I want to do is rip your fucking throat out." Andy replied with spite.

 _Breaking the bond, but only one way? What a fucking cruel twist of fate that is_ Ronnie thought to himself. He watched as the singer stood up, grabbing his phone from the bedside table with clear intent on leaving.

"Where are you going? Whoa... Andy, you have to stay here." Ronnie jumped off the bed, catching up to the younger man in the living room.

"I'm leaving. Get the fuck out of my way. I have to figure out how to undo this shit before tour fucking starts." He huffed, pushing the other man out of the way.

"Tour? The fuck you're going on that. You'll kill everyone there. You at least have to learn some fucking control first. Andy... there's no undoing this. You're dead." The words hurt him to say aloud, not wanting to admit it to himself.

Andy didn't hear Ronnie's words, overcome by pain again as he gripped the side of the couch. It was coming in waves, the feeling of being on fire bringing him to his knees. His jaw throbbed from deep within the bone as his fangs developed. Minute by minute his body converting into its new form. Breaking out in a cold sweat as his body heated up, it was worse than when he had the flu the year he first moved to California. The suffering seemed to have no end.

Ronnie watched, helplessly as Andy withered in pain. There was nothing he could do to alleviate it even though he would gladly take the boy's place. He had gone through the same thing, only confined to a jail cell. There was no one there to guide him, he hadn't yet made 'friends' with Johnny at the time.

"Let me help you..." Ronnie pleaded, kneeling down beside him.

Andy stayed silent, his nausea and migraine were getting worse, the lights in the living room not helping the matter. Despite how sick he felt he had an overwhelming thirst, but it wasn't like anything he'd felt before. He shuttered to think what it might be for.

The thought of what Ronnie had done to him filled the boy with rage, but somehow the man's presence still brought him a subconscious sense of peace. He closed his eyes, trying to relax as Ronnie stroked his hair.

Ronnie sat down on the carpet, pulling the singer down into his lap. Andy shook as he rested his head on the man's legs, a sudden round of chills overcoming him. Every muscle, bone and fiber of his being ached.

"I'm so thirsty..." Andy groaned.

"That's because you need to feed..." Ronnie replied, biting his lip.

"No... I just need some water." Andy insisted, knowing he was lying to himself.

"That's not a good idea, but okay... I'll get you some," Ronnie said, getting up and walking into the kitchen to get a bottle of water.

For the first time since he'd turned, he felt physically exhausted. He'd felt mental fatigue (mostly the result of Andy) but physical? That wasn't something he'd dealt with for a while. His body felt heavy and weak like he hadn't fed in days. He glanced over at the singer laying on the living room floor; was it because of their connection? That wouldn't make sense if it was broken.

He had hope that it was just temporary, the result of the sheer amount of pain Andy was in. Once his body acclimated to the changes, he'd feel the same again, right? If Ronnie remembered correctly, it took about a week to get used to things. Sunlight still was a harsh one, but he made do. It was another month or so before he trusted himself around humans and that was only if he was well fed. If Andy refused to drink blood, then he was in for a very hard time. He needed to get his strength up and there was only one way to do that.

Andy downed the water as fast as he could, hoping that it would stop the intense thirst. Instead of relief, he was met with an intense wave of nausea. The water threatening to come back up as his body rejected it.

Ronnie resisted the urge to make a smart comment about having warned him, pulling a trashcan over beside Andy. He held the singer's hair back, wincing as he got sick. He remembered the denial, the desperate attempts to prove to himself that he wasn't a _monster_. That somehow it had all been a bad dream; just a virus he'd convinced himself. Food poisoning, the flu, hell even rabies, you name it. Of course, none of those things make you crave human blood, develop fangs, or gain superhuman strength.

"Fucking hell..." Andy moaned, absolutely miserable.

Ronnie brushed the singer's hair back, running his fingertips up and down Andy's spine. "You need to feed... nothing else is going to make you feel better..."

"No... I'm not doing that. I'm not killing someone." Andy growled.

"You don't _have_ to kill people. You can learn self-control, but you're going to kill the first person you feed on. I won't lie to you about that."

"I'm not doing it," Andy repeated, hugging his legs to his chest. Shaking as more chills hit him along with another wave of pain.

"You don't have a choice. Do you want to feel even worse than you do now? Because if you think this is bad, trying going without blood." Ronnie warned. "I can... go get you some, but eventually you're going to have to face the reality of things."

"You should have let me die." Andy's voice was void of emotion but inside he was falling apart.

The only reason he had ever been open to turning was to stay with Ronnie. The thought of ever having to separate from him was too much to bear, there wasn't anything he wouldn't do for the man. Yet here he was, joined in eternity with him. And what a mistake it had turned out to be. The bond was gone.

Or was it? 


	20. Take Your Crosses, I'll Live Without Them

**Chapter Nineteen: Take Your Crosses, I'll Live Without Them**

_June 22nd, 2011 9:00 PM_

Andy gazed down at the small jewelry box, his thumb grazing the metal clasp. A sad smile on his face as he tried his best to put on a convincing act. "I love it, mom... thank you... yes, of course, I'll wear it on stage..."

He flipped the top of it open, looking the delicate cross necklace over. The sterling silver shining under the sliver of sunlight peeking through the curtains. "No, you don't need to come all the way out here... I am taking care of myself..."

The singer bit his lip as he held back tears, his heart aching from the concern in her voice. "It's just a couple of ribs, I'm okay, mom... really."

The burns on his fingertips were already starting to blister, the scent of singed flesh making him feel sick to his stomach. He didn't have the heart to tell her she would never see it on him; or that she might never see him again. She had been calling him non-stop since the night of the show, offering to come to California and take care of him. What was he supposed to say? _Sorry, mom, you can't come to see your only son because he'll try to kill you? Oh, and didn't you know he's been dead for almost a week?_

"I know dad is worried too... I know I got lucky... yes, of course, I'm doing what the doctor said... I love you too..." He started to choke up, a single tear falling down his cheek and onto the dresser.

"... I will call you soon, I promise. Okay... bye, mom..." The line went dead as she hung up, the phone beeping before going silent.

Andy lowered his head, gripping the sides of the dresser as he struggled to keep it together. The cross staring up at him; mocking him. It had arrived in the mail, addressed to him from his parent's house in Ohio. He hadn't even thought twice before going to take it out of the box, for a moment forgetting his new reality. The second his fingers made contact with the silver his skin had ignited, burning through several layers in a flash. The sheering pain making him pull back in a knee jerk reaction.

It was his grandmother's necklace; she had worn it for most of her life before giving it to his mom. Passed down through the women in her family for over a century, as an only son now it was his. A handwritten note tucked inside of the box, _Andy, I hope this cheers you up and that may one day you pass it along to your child – love, mom._

"Yeah... one day..." Andy whispered to himself, knowing he would never give his mother a grandchild. Not anymore.

How long would he be able to keep the secret from his parents? Even if he learned to control the hunger that raged inside him, they would eventually notice his lack of aging. The lack of a pulse or beating heart, aversion to sunlight, or new set of teeth. His band would notice, his friends, managers, everyone in his life. He would outlive every single person he loved, stuck with only one who he struggled to even tolerate now. Any feelings he had for the older man were shrinking by the day, each hour that ticked by the remanence of the bond dissolving. Leaving in its wake resentment and bitterness; damned to eternity by fleeting romance, how poetic.

Tired bloodshot eyes looked back at him in the mirror, dark circles had formed under them making them appear sunken in. His cheeks hollow and gaunt; lips pale and cracked. His skin was almost translucent, blueish-green lines demarking the veins that ran through it. Bones jutted out of his hips, shoulders, and back, his energy plumping to almost zero. His normally silk black hair was dull and lifeless; starting to look as dead as he felt.

Five days without blood.

He could hear Ronnie in the other room, on the phone with his manager. Fighting with him about his refusal to leave for tour with the rest of the band. Insisting that it would only be for the first week, that he couldn't leave him by himself. He had a similar fight the night before with the newly deceased singer. Andy had insisted on starting Warped on time despite having fed even once, making him a threat to anyone with a beating heart. He hadn't even been around a human since he turned.

The door to the bedroom flew open, the older man standing in the doorway, crossing his arms. Andy could feel his eyes on him, analyzing his withering form. He had tried several times to get the singer to drink, going so far as to break into a blood bank. Still, Andy refused. Choosing instead to suffer through the consequences of not only turning but starvation as well. The self-flagellation starting to get old.

"This ends tonight." He spoke in a monotone.

"Fuck off..." Andy warned, bracing himself as his stomach started to cramp again. The deep pain reaching a fever pitch inside him.

"Why are you doing this to yourself? You _have_ to feed; you're not proving anything to anyone by resisting."

"Why? So, you don't have to feel guilty about what you did to me? No..." Andy stumbled back, the muscles in his legs aching as he laid back on the bed.

" _You_ called me. _You_ asked me to come home because _you_ were scared of dying. _You_ begged me to change you, so you don't get to change your mind now that you got your wish." The older man snapped, walking over to the bed and yanking the singer up by his leather jacket.

" _I_ saved your fucking life. It was your decision to get blackout drunk and act like a reckless fucking idiot on stage. Jesus fucking Christ Andy- _you_ were the one who decided to get back on stage instead of going to a fucking hospital."

Ronnie had had enough, watching the younger man suffer for the past five days had been gut-wrenching. Andy had refused any help, choosing instead to be by himself in agony day and night. He hadn't left the bedroom in days. Alternating between tossing and turning in bed and laying on the bathroom floor, throwing up what had to be nothing but stomach acid at this point. Yelling at the older man any time he tried to come in and check on him.

"If it wasn't for your stupid fucking blood bond, I wouldn't have been in this position in the first place!" Andy shot back, somehow mustering the energy to sit up.

"So, don't pin this on me. Don't pretend like you didn't want things to end this way so you would have someone else to spend the rest of your miserable existence with!" The exertion was quickly wearing him out, making him feel dizzy and out of breath.

Ronnie clenched his fists, looking away from the singer in order to calm himself down. Trying to remind himself that Andy's lashing out was the result of being deprived of blood for so long and that his true feelings were still there. Of course, the thought had crossed his mind several times in the past few days that perhaps Andy didn't actually love him. That it was all the result of some supernatural mind control that was now broken. If that were true, then why didn't it break for him as well?

The older man sighed, walking over to where Andy was leaning against the bedpost, his frail body trembling. Crystal blue eyes looked up at him, devoid of almost any emotion besides resentment.

"Look me in the fucking eyes and tell me you'd rather do this on your own. Tell me right now if you feel nothing for me." Ronnie growled, grabbing the boy by the jaw and kneeling down to his level.

Andy bit his lip, staying silent. The sorrow and mourning making it hard to see anything but hate. All the things in life he would never get to do. All the fears that his new existence brought with it swirled around in his head. Spending his entire childhood afraid of the dark and the creatures that lurked in it, only to grow up and become one. The endless void that he felt inside from not being able to feel the one thing he needed: the connection with the man in front of him.

Ronnie raised an eyebrow, still waiting for an answer. "Well? No answer? Really?"

"I don't owe you anything." Andy shook his head, standing up and brushing past him to grab his cigarettes from the dresser.

Lighting one up before he even reached the front door and inhaling deeply. Nicotine didn't have the same effect as it had when he was human, its ability to calm his nerves diminished. Cigarettes had been his companion since fifteen though, and he longed for any security blanket he had left.

He leaned his elbows against the balcony railing, as tears threatened to fall again. Did he still love Ronnie? Underneath all the anger and shock... yes. But the comfort that the man used to bring was gone and although he tried desperately to find that connection again, he couldn't. Countless times over the past few nights he'd wanted the comfort that Ronnie tried to give him, but it didn't feel the same as when he was human. That was the thing he mourned most.

In the singer's sulking, he almost didn't notice the woman walking towards the apartment complex. Her scent picking up in the wind and catching his attention, the sound of her steady heartbeat causing a visceral reaction. She was completely oblivious to his presence as she laughed to someone on the phone, brushing her long brunette hair to the side as she twisted a strand around her finger.

Andy swallowed hard; his eyes fixated on her exposed neck. His fangs barely hidden behind his lips as he stood paralyzed.

"How far away are you guys... I can't believe I beat you here... I'll just wait here, no big deal. It's pretty nice out..." She spoke, sitting on the flight of stairs below the singer.

A gruesome scene flashed before his eyes; the white sidewalks splattered with crimson red blood. Her neck torn open as she laid dead on the stairway, her cellphone shattered on the ground beside her. She didn't even have time to scream before her life came to a ghastly end. His hands and lips dripping with her blood.

Andy shook his head, the mental image disappearing. The girl had hung up the phone, placing it inside her purse. Still not realizing the danger she was in. He could feel himself losing the battle to control the impulse to drain her, his grip on the railing starting to loosen. The wood creaking under his boots as he inched closer to her, his body seeming to move without his brain's control. 

The singer hit the ground with enough force to knock the wind out of him, pulling him out of his trace. A hand around his throat, keeping him pinned against the wood as he tried to fight back against his attacker.

"Fuck! Let me go!" He frantically tried to free himself as he heard the woman running away, her heartbeat becoming harder and harder to hear.

"Are you fucking insane? So, you can kill some trust fund baby and have the entire LAPD up our asses?!" Ronnie growled, wrestling with the younger man until he was able to lock him in a chokehold.

Andy clawed at his hands, ripping open deep gashes in his skin. The older man cursed in pain, dragging the singer back inside. Andy's sudden energy was surprising given his weakened state, the need to feed overcoming it. The animalistic compulsion completely taking him over as he struggled to overpower Ronnie, ultimately losing the battle.

"This is exactly what the fuck I was trying to avoid. You can't just go after anyone! Ask the fucking assholes I was in jail with how that worked out for them!" Ronnie chastised the singer.

Andy pushed himself up, his arms shaking from exhaustion. Stunned at the lack of remorse he felt for having almost killed the woman, something he would have never forgiven himself for. All he could think of was how good her blood would have tasted, how it would have made the burning ache in his stomach finally stop. The fever, night sweats, nausea, fatigue, and insanity had to end; he couldn't take it anymore.

"Fuck... why did you stop me..." he cried, collapsing onto the hallway floor.

"Andy... please... let me help you..." Ronnie begged, the frustration with the man fading as the longing to protect him took over.

He knelt beside the singer, offering his hand. Andy glanced up at it, the scratch marks already starting to heal from the scuffle outside. The scent of Ronnie's blood still lingered, the younger man's eyes going to his tattooed neck as he took the man's hand.

"It hurts so bad..." Andy whispered, allowing the older man to pull him into an embrace.

"I know, babe... that's why you need to let me teach you how to hunt," Ronnie replied, shocked by Andy's abrupt softening to him.

"I'm so hungry..." Andy rested his head on the man's shoulder, his lips brushing against his neck.

"Andy... what are you... ah- fuck-" Ronnie gasped as the boy's fangs sunk into his flesh, catching him off guard.

The taste of the man's blood was euphoric, the pain in the singer's gut starting to dissipate as he slowly started to drink from him. Andy closed his eyes, relaxing as Ronnie stroked his hair gently. 

Ronnie tilted his head back, biting back a moan. As far as he knew vampire blood didn't do anything for other vampires, but then again there was still so much he didn't know. After five days of starving and suffering the consequences, he'd give the boy anything that might alleviate that pain.

Andy gasped for breath as he pulled back, the agony he was in lifting enough that he could gather his senses. Ronnie brushed the singer's hair back, watching as life started to return to the boy's features. His beauty and youth absolutely breathtaking despite the blood staining his lips. The walking corpse that he had resembled disappearing before his eyes.

Andy opened his mouth to speak but words failed him, overcome by the sight of the man in front of him. Feeling at peace for the first time in what felt like forever as the world melted away. All the fears of losing his connection to the man faded as he looked into Ronnie's eyes. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the support and comments I've been receiving lately! I just wanted to let everyone know that I start back to school on Monday so updates for this story and my Matt/Andy one might be a little bit slower <3


	21. Reverse This Curse

**Chapter Twenty: Reverse This Curse**

"Andy?" Ronnie broke through the silence, hesitating before reaching out and cupping the side of the boy's face.

"Oh my god..." Andy breathed, closing his eyes and relaxing at the man's touch. "It's back..."

Ronnie looked at the singer in awe, still questioning what exactly had triggered the bond again. Was it solely feeding or was it because he'd drank _his_ blood, somehow reigniting their connection?

For the first time since he'd turned Andy felt like he could breathe again. Though still in pain it had lessened considerably, his veins no longer feeling like they were on fire. His mind was calm as Ronnie's presence once again brought him comfort. It was so much more intense now, stronger than anything he'd felt as a human. He'd move heaven and earth for the man.

The older man smiled, "Does this mean you don't hate me anymore?"

"Ronnie... fuck, I'm so sorry... I didn't mean the things I said to you-"

"Hey, it's okay. I'm sure I was an asshole to everyone around me when I was going through it as well." Ronnie interrupted the singer, helping him to his feet.

The words Andy had said to him had hurt. They had cut like knives through his flesh, and unlike real wounds, these didn't heal right away. _A pathetic, miserable existence_ ; those were the words that had been on loop in his head since he'd woken up in that prison infirmary. Until he met Andy; that had given him purpose to his existence. He was light in an otherwise dark world. To have that light turn against him, refuse him, and blame him had been agonizing.

The events of the last week were some of the hardest he'd ever endured. Between watching the singer die only to come back and suffer day after day had nearly killed him. Andy had been right; he was the reason for his pain. If he never came into his life, then he'd probably be alive right now. On tour and thriving without a worry in the world. Instead, here he was. Damned to a life of murder, violence, and heartbreak.

Hearing him on the phone with his mother was torture. He could feel the sorrow in his voice, and he'd seen the burns on his fingers from the necklace. Unlike him, Andy actually had a mother who loved and cared about him. If only she knew what he'd done to her only son, there was no doubt in Ronnie's mind that she would put a stake in his heart.

Ronnie took the younger man's hand in his, turning it over expecting to see blisters from the silver. He raised an eyebrow at the flawless skin, not a single trace of the burns was left. Silver burns took days to heal, sometimes weeks depending on how deep they penetrated.

It was all starting to hit him now as he stared at the boy's fingers. It was the blood. It was the same reason he had gone from intending to kill Andy in his car the first night to dedicating his life to protecting him. Was it random chance he stumbled into that bar and picked Andy out from a sea of potential blood bags? Or was it fate, pulling the puppet strings on them both. Forcing them together time and time again. And for what? Was this always the inevitable outcome? Vampires were known for being cold, callous creatures who killed without remorse. Was this the universe's way of giving them an Achille's heel, tying them to another, and forcing them to have a heart?

Andy leaned into the older man, lacing their fingers together. Frowning when Ronnie turned his head to the side, looking away.

"Ronnie?"

He felt guilty for not sharing the singer's newfound enthusiasm for what was objectively a fucked-up situation. Andy had been right; it was his fault. He was the first domino in a chain of events that cumulated in the younger man's death. When the bond was broken that revealed the truth; Andy did want this life. For five days straight he'd refused his desperate attempts to help, then in the blink of an eye he loved him again?

Ronnie's mind was in a tailspin. It's just the bond; it was always just the bond. Andy wasn't giving his love out of free will, it was some supernatural curse controlling his heart. It was back, but the illusion had been shattered. Was the life Ronnie had imagined having with the younger man, joined together in immortality, just the end goal of a curse to create more of his kind?

"It's not real... How you feel, it's not real. What _both_ of us feel... isn't real, Andy." Ronnie sighed, letting go of the singer's hands.

"What are you talking about... of course it's real. Ronnie, it's exactly how it was before... stronger actually." Andy felt his heart drop in his chest, a frantic feeling in his veins.

"You hated my guts twenty minutes ago; don't you see it? It's just the universe fucking with our heads" Ronnie shook his head, the realization threatening to undo him.

"Fuck... don't you get it now? The way we feel about each other, the bond, it's just a fucking curse. Meant to weaken us both..."

Andy shook his head, not understanding why Ronnie was suddenly acting this way. How could he say their feelings for each other weren't real when he'd never been so sure of something in his life? Even if it was just the bond, he didn't care. It didn't change things; wasn't that all love was anyways? Chemical reactions inside the head.

"Ronnie... I never _hated_ you. I still loved you the whole time... _that_ part never left. And fuck it, even if it is all some vampire voodoo supernatural shit... I don't care. I love you..." Andy pleaded, hoping that Ronnie would snap out of whatever 'epiphany' he was in.

"And you're dead because of it. What kind of fucked up love story is that? You were right, what happened to you _is_ my fault. I couldn't let you go... and now you'll never get to have the life you were meant to have." The older man started to choke up, his mind going back to that cold December night at the bar.

Andy had been so full of life, warm skin, a beating heart and an insatiable thirst for all the world had to offer. Behind the cocksure attitude and Rockstar bravado, he'd seen the kind heart of a kid who only wanted to leave the world a better place. The polar opposite of a bloodthirsty killer leaving violence and death in his wake.

"Loving you isn't a curse... why aren't you happy? Nothing can ever tear us apart again; we have eternity to spend together... isn't that what you wanted?" Andy replied, the raw emotions threatening to break loose.

Ronnie turned his back to the singer, making his way down the hall to the spare bedroom. He could hear Andy's boots clicking across the floor as he followed behind him, stopping at the door frame. His crystal blue eyes were full of panic. Ronnie knew the type of fear he was feeling, the fear that he might lose the most important thing in the world. It was the same dread that he felt every time Andy wasn't near him. The only thing that made living forever not terrifying, the only thing that kept him from driving a stake through his own heart, was Andy. Now _he_ knew that feeling. That was the curse.

"Do you feel it? Like there's a fucking bolder on your chest and you can't breathe? That you might lose me and suddenly forever becomes a never-ending nightmare?" Ronnie asked, turning the sharpened piece of wood over in his hand.

"What are you trying to do Ronnie... is this pay back for what I put you through or something?" The wavering nervousness in Andy's voice pulled at the strings of the older man's heart.

"The truth is we're not truly immortal. We _can_ die. And unlike last time there's no loophole to bring us back... and then the other is left behind..."

Ronnie held the stake up, offering it to the singer. Andy hesitated before taking it, trying to push the thought of why Ronnie might have it out of his mind.

"Do you know what that is?"

"A stake?" Andy answered.

"Yeah... I made that the night you saw me kill someone, the night you _almost_ died. And I planned to use it on myself if I ever lost you. You know I almost did... when you weren't waking up... I thought about it. All because the thought of existing on this earth without you was unbearable." Ronnie took the shard of wood back, tossing it into the bedside table drawer.

"That's the curse. And it's taken me until now to realize it because I didn't want to see it. It's a fucking punishment, Andy. Vampires... they fucking kill people without remorse. They destroy lives and leave heartbreak and sorrow in their wake. So, what does the universe do? How does it make things right?" Ronnie laughed bitterly, pushing his hair back as he paced back and forth in front of the stunned singer.

"It gives us a heart. It gives _us_ someone to lose. It _makes_ us feel a love no human in the world ever could... and then... one day... it'll take that away. And the pain of that won't even compare; not to silver, not sunlight, not a fucking stake through the heart."

Ronnie looked up, studying the boy's reaction. Andy bit his lip, his eyes brimming with tears as he stayed completely silent. His arms wrapped around his thin frame as he struggled to keep his composure. He wanted to scream, prove to Ronnie that he had it all wrong. There was no way that love could ever be a curse, there had to be another explanation.

"No... I refuse to accept that. You said it yourself... finding your match is almost statistically impossible. Seven billion people and yet we found each other? If it was a punishment don't you think it would be... easier?" Andy retorted.

"And more importantly, who knows why anyone loves anyone?! I don't care _why_ I love you... it feels just as real regardless." Andy's mind refused to entertain the idea that fate had brought them together just to destroy them.

The past week had been full of unimaginable pain, the thought of going through anything worse seemed too cruel to consider. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't petrified of his new existence, or that he was done mourning the life he had. He hadn't even killed someone yet; he knew there was more pain to come but Ronnie was a life raft in a sea of uncertainty. He'd experienced what it felt like to lose the bond and the comfort it brought. _That_ felt like punishment.

Ronnie sighed, deciding against arguing with the boy any longer. "You're too much of an optimist about things... the world is cruel, Andy."

The older man sat down on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands. The memories of Andy's death had been haunting him since the night it happened. Edging him closer to the brink of insanity every time he closed his eyes. He'd failed him; if he'd only listened to the boy's pleas to stay then the events of that night might have been drastically different.

"You should go get some rest... you still need it." He finally spoke, tears welling up in his eyes.

Andy stood motionless in the doorway, still in too much shock from the day's events to process anything the man said. A deep aching feeling in his chest from the sight of Ronnie's pain. Through everything he'd been through, he'd failed to consider what it had been like for Ronnie, how much it hard worn him down.

The singer knelt down in front of Ronnie, resting his hands on the man's knees. Through his dark brown hair, Andy could see the tears running down his face, his fist clenched so tight his knuckles were turning white.

"Come lay down with me?" Andy whispered, relieved when Ronnie nodded in agreement.

Ronnie stared up at the silk canopy above his bed, taking a sip from his glass of whiskey. The bitter liquid burned his throat and numbed his mind. He wanted to believe Andy; he wanted to believe that their bond wasn't a curse. That their love was real. That the worst was behind them now. It was the uncertainty of things that gave him hesitation, there was still so much he didn't understand about it all. The only other vampires he knew were locked up on life sentences, not that he particularly trusted them anyway.

He glanced down at the younger man curled up beside him. Andy smiled softly, reaching a hand out and caressing his cheek. It would take him a while to get used to not hearing the boy's steady heartbeat every night; the feeling of his warm skin pressed against his own. Andy didn't yet realize what was in store for him. It had taken Ronnie months just to be able to control himself around humans, and he still found it hard to resist draining them whenever he fed. Andy had mere days before they were both expected to be on tour, surrounded by thousands of people every day. Performing in broad daylight and living on a cramped bus while keeping his new reality a secret from the people he considered his brothers.

In retrospect, prison had made things easy for him. Locked in a cell for the majority of his time; and who cared if he couldn't control his urge to kill? Would the world miss the murderers, rapists, abusers, and pedophiles he fed on? Of course not, it was the perfect place to learn self-restraint.

Andy pressed his lips against the older man's jaw, sensing his tension. "I love you..." he whispered.

"I love you too," Ronnie replied, turning onto his side to face the singer and pull him in close.

He prayed he'd be able to control the worst in Andy; save him from the things he didn't yet know he was capable of. That he wouldn't lose himself to the blood lust that he was already trying so hard to deny. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not being able to update for a while, school is very intense this semester. But I wanted to get a chapter out for Valentine's Day <3 thank you all for being so patient lol. I'm hoping my course load lightens up a bit come March for more frequent updates.


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